Snoink

AHHHH I'M GLAD YOU LIKED IT IN ALL CAPS!!! :D I love how the swans seem to adhere to fairy-tale logic. Hmmm...what do you mean by fairy tale logic? The ...

Hello again and thank you so much for another review! :D I will say, this chapter is pretty long. I enjoyed all of it as I don't mind longer chapters ...

Yay! Thank you so much for reading this, sound! (Also, getting it out of the Green Room, woooo!) You use the phrase %u201Cgrew red%u201D at least five or six times ...

IMP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D It's been too long! I'd love to offer line edit, but I'd want to know what stage the drafting was in before I did that -- and whether ...

Yay! :D Someone who has an insight of the other draft! Would you say that this is improved??? Sometimes, I worry that my edits only make things worse, hahaha. That ...

Ahhh thank you so much for your review, Kay! :D I'm glad you liked the worldbuilding aspect and thought the dialogue held up, even though it's very dialogue heavy! In ...

I shall wait with bated breath! :o

Ahhhhh! Thank you for taking my work out of the green room, Raven! :D It did feel..definitely not bloated, but a teeny bit drawn out for an opening chapter, like ...

... this is going to sound bad, but I have no recollection of writing this. XD I'm going to have to go though my notes from ten years ago and ...

(With that said, I would totally have the detective and that awful woman make passive aggressive swipes to Hinata. Like, not enough to make Lydia realize why they're making the ...

Hmmmm... So an idea, possibly, is to make Lydia acknowledge, briefly, that she was surprised by Hinata's appearance, but that she was also okay with the idea of a woman ...

Ahhhhh! Thank you for your review!!! ^^;; Oy... that age thing! Honestly, it's hard for me to nail down ages. I don't think I did a good job on this ...

OMG. XD I forgot about this work! It's actually a parody of the novel that I was writing at the time, which was called FREAK -- yes, all caps, lol. ...

Omg, I love this so much. XD I hope Wist loves it too. :3

Ysy! I'm glad it helped. Also, it occurs to me that instead of saying cavernous rift, you can say chasm and it would be even more powerful imagery...