Rydia

Hai! Just a couple of nit-picks for you first: Joseph continued sawing the cross beams. Though his fingers meagrely hinged after the years of labour, [Some very strange phrasing going ...

Hai! Here I am and I shall start with a few line-by-line comments... During the so called “dark” ages... [Okay so instead of telling us in this way, you could ...

Hi again! I have come to take a look at your other poem :) Line-By-Line Raw. Paralyzed. Heaving. Wallowing. [I'm not sure if I like this. The words are good ...

Heya! Okay so my first comment is for the title. No Name. It's a little ordinary and doesn't excite much interest. I'm thinking that Nameless would be better, or perhaps ...

Hey, hey ^^ Alright so my first thoughts are that this feels a little disjointed and while there's somewhere there, the flow isn't quite right and the tone's a little ...

Haiiiii just little old me :D Line-By-Line My daughter and her Chink fiance were on the way for dinner and the night. [Slightly awkward phrasing. Maybe simply leave it at, ...

Haiii! Okay so you have a beautiful beginning, though I'm not sure that 'scorned' is the right word in that second line. It feels really awkward and it's hard to ...

Hai! Here I am as promised, sorry it took a while ^^ Line-By-Line Captain Needew and his men were on this flight for five hours now, they were deep in ...

I think I shall make this my last review for the day :) We were back on the road and my legs were aching. I’d decided not to mention the ...

Next chapter! First off, I like the concept of humans having their names written all over them. It brings a lot of interesting thoughts to my mind and it's just ...

Hi again! I meandered slowly through town, Victor following me closely as if he was about to lose me. He reminded me of a small beggar child, following behind a ...

Be nice and be honest? Those are two rather contradicting instructions ;) But I kid, I kid! This is a lovely poem you have here, not perfect but there's certainly ...

Hi again! Just little old me :) Opening Your opening confuses me! It doesn't flow on from the prologue, but then I suppose that's why you made that part a ...

Hai oh team-mate of mine, I'm here to shower your novel with some love as requested. I probably won't do more than a section or two today, but I'll try ...

Hey again! Okay so I'm not sure if the poem at the top is inspiration for this or part of this but it was cute. I think I'll concentrate on ...