Rydia

Hey Alzz! Love the idea behind this but I think you could touch it up in a few places. Here's my general thoughts on flow and such: The Colors [In ...

Hey there hun

Hi again :) Alright so after reading this, a lot of my comments on the first half apply to this part as well. I still think you've got some good ...

Hey hey ^^ So I figured I might as well review the first half before I take a look at the second. In general, I think you've got a good ...

Hey hey ^^ Sorry about the delay, I'm in the process of moving so everything's pretty hectic XD Anyway, Introduction Love it. The dialogue is fast paced and amusing, the ...

Hullo again! Okay so I'll start with a few comments and then try to give you some overall guidance: There was a time before man and before the gods, a ...

Hey hey :) Loving the characterisation in this piece and the realism of it, that was very nicely done. Your characters are easy to connect to, the scene easy to ...

Hey hey ^^ Okay so I'll start with a few nit-picks/ line by line comments and then give you a few suggestions and such. Sound good? Here we go... Tense ...

Hey hey ^^ I haven't read the other installments but I'll see what advice I can give :) He must be dreaming , she thought with disappointment. (She also thought, ...

Hey hey ^^ So you have an interesting piece here, some good characterisation and a high level of detail. I think it needs some work but that's what you're here ...

Hey hey! My apologies for the delay on this, you caught me during exam week but hopefully this will be worth the wait ^^ “I bought you a rose.” [Sometimes ...

Hey hey! Okay so first impressions are that I like this a lot; you've got a good sense of style and there's enough hook to keep the reader interested throughout. ...

Heya! Sorry about the delay, essay deadlines have been kind of crazy this week. Instead of heading toward any of the homes’ front doors, [Sometimes I find your writing a ...

I'll do the sections thing again as you're probably not in need of any more nit-picks ^^ Bathroom Slow that scene down. That's the perfect chance for JoJo to be ...

Hey hey ^^ Okay so you have quite a few reviews already which means I'm going to skip the nit-picks and go straight to some sectional advice. Characterization It's a ...