Ross

This was very sweet, but it bordered on cliche. A little bit. The memory stuff is cliche and it isn't very Ron-ish. Try it like this: "Ever since I saw ...

I was confused about the theme also. I think if it is about God, then you should scatter more hints throughout BEFORE coming to the bridge. Right now, the bridge ...

Well, I was reading it and at first I was discouraged because to me, it was all telling. But as I kept reading, the mood seemed to get more ethereal ...

I read them obsessively when I was in grade school. "Among The Hidden" is a very well-written book, partly because of the sympathy Luke gets as being a Third Child. ...

I *heart* To Kill A Mockingbird. Let me tell you my reasons: 1. The voice is described in impeccable detail. I actually knew the narrator before I had even started ...

A long time since I've heard her voice sound so plainly happy, free of so much pain and resentment. This last line seems a bit unneccessary. You're basically repeating what ...

For the most part, a friend of mine and myself have been warring off on who Bella will finally stick with. And I'm happy that it has been settled once ...

He knew what he wanted tonight, his new club had just been named the number one club in Chicago and he was planning on celebrating his victory by having the ...

It's over. It's so over. Your smell of cheap cologne is nauseating. Your once lovable touch makes my skin crawl. I can't believe I had once loved you. You promised ...

I'm going to kind of change it according to my opinions and stuff. Then I'll bestow on the praise after. :lol: I am packing . B oxes clutter what was ...

SECRETS IN PERIL As the cat was yaw n ing, Douglas [s]pulled[/s] Pulled isn't very good description. How about hauled? his muscular frame up from the couch and walked over ...

This is admittedly full of grammar errors. Your spelling stuff is okay, but I need to give you a book about story-writing because this isn't exactly professional-looking work. And also, ...

I have to agree with the first and second posters above me. (Hi, there!) :lol: This seems to have a very light impact on the reader. If you were trying ...

This was just a little something I cooked up yesterday and I hope you like it. ---- When Death Kissed the Moon “It’s been nearly a century since any goddesses ...

This was actually very refreshing to read. I had a little trouble with writing sex scenes and making sure they were appropriate for this site. You've paved the way for ...