Nightshade

Hi bookworm, Eloquent Dragon has given you a ton of good nitpicks, so I'll just throw some general impressions your way. The first paragraph seems very abrupt and underdeveloped. I ...

Really great job, Persy. I can't believe how much you improved this from the piece you showed me. I have a couple suggestions, but they are all nitpicks. cancerous ghosts ...

I read the first Idolatry, and you have a really great idea here. I would review that one also, but you've done a ton of great work on it, and ...

Hey Kaitlin :) I tend to agree with what you've written in your spoiler. You have some really nice stuff here, but it needs some cleaning up. I'll jump right ...

This is easily my favorite poem of yours. Your imagery and emotion are in perfect balance, and every line is carefully placed and meaningful. I loved your the style of ...

This is one of my favorites of yours. You've started to work in some emotion to mix with your imagery, and it works really nicely. Actually, my main criticism is ...

I have to disagree with the previous reviewers on grammar and structure. The ideas behind a poem form its core, but the presentation of the piece is tremendously important in ...

Hey Kamas, I've decided to give you an annoyingly late review :) Reading this, I ended up feeling very similar to what Elinor described.The poem seemed like a giant conglomeration ...

You have some really nice sparks of insight and creativity here, but right now some flaws are distracting a lot of attention from them. You built this on an interesting ...

Really great work, lass. I think you've set a new standard for yourself here :) Lumi has given you a lot of great stuff, so I'm only going to hit ...

Hi Lumi :) The ideas and words you lay out here are pretty incredible. You show a tremendous amount of insight and ability with your words. However, I felt a ...

It's great to see you experimenting with your style. There are some strong elements in here and some that need to be reworked and built upon. That's to be expected ...

This made me very very happy. You've done a great job of conveying one of the most awkwardly joyful experiences most people have, and the short length of the piece ...

You use some nice language here, but the content didn't do a ton for me. I ended up feeling like this was a collection of sketches built around an idea, ...

This might be the most intriguing poem I've seen you put out. The poem built nicely on the "body is a cage" metaphor (which reminded me almost distractingly of the ...