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MotherVirgo

MotherVirgo

  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: A Wantasy Legend ~ CHP. 1 (Editing #2)

    Well...the newer chapters will only be uploaded on Wattpad. :)

    Aug 3, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: A Wantasy Legend ~ CHP. 1 (Editing #2)

    I'm serious. I really want this story to be good, and you're a talented proofreader. With this being said; I make this proposal genuine. Also, I just edited both of ...

    Aug 3, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: A Wantasy Legend ~ CHP. 1 (Editing #2)

    Yeah, you are helpful. Please...stick around. I think you'll come in handy...I'll even shout you out if I publish this as a real book one day. :D

    Aug 3, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: A Wantasy Legend ~ CHP. 1 (Editing #2)

    Also, you mentioned dialogue many times. I think that If I started a new paragraph for every time a new set of quotes started, some paragraphs would just be sentences.

    Aug 3, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: A Wantasy Legend ~ CHP. 1 (Editing #2)

    By the way, the planets orbiting Wantasy are like our planets orbiting the sun. Wantasy's moons are inside of Wantasy because it's huge.

    Aug 3, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: A Wantasy Legend ~ CHP. 1 (Editing #2)

    Don't worry, I revise what's already here, thanks to you. I find the: "And breath!" part funny. Anyway, this was more constructive than any of the critiquing I've had this ...

    Aug 3, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: A Wantasy Adventure ~ CHP. 2 (Editing #1)

    Exposition; If I explain things the way I'd want to it would just go on the other side of the spectrum. >_

    Jul 30, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: A Wantasy Adventure ~ CHP. 2 (Editing #1)

    -earth years, *Wantasy years~

    Jul 30, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: A Wantasy Adventure ~ CHP. 2 (Editing #1)

    - I deleted the two other Mantel things, and will edit it. - I did mention the barricade; it was the walls that began to concuss around the capsule once ...

    Jul 30, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: A Wantasy Adventure ~ CHP. 2 (Editing #1)

    Thank you for your input. It felt more negative than positive, but that's life right? When life gives you lemons, squirt em in your wounds. Hey, thanks. I get that ...

    Jul 29, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: A Wantasy Adventure ~ CHP. 2 (Editing #1)

    Hi, I just have a few questions for your review. So, what I'd like to know is: 1. Do capsules usually move themselves? Probs not; This capsule, however, CAN move ...

    Jul 29, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: A Wantasy Legend ~ CHP. 1 (Editing #2)

    Hey, please read it once I edit it!

    Jul 28, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: A Wantasy Legend ~ CHP. 1 (Editing #2)

    This is exactly what I was told when I said that about drawing. The problem is that it isn't an interest of mine...yet.

    Jul 28, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: A Wantasy Legend ~ CHP. 1 (Editing #2)

    *Tackles and smooches* Thank youu! I know, there are more errors than there are perks, and I know I shouldn't write. I know I don't have talent, but I've been ...

    Jul 28, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: A Wantasy Legend ~ CHP. 1 (Editing #2)

    FOR # 1

    Jul 27, 2017


We think in generalities, but we live in details.
— Alfred North Whitehead