Misty

heeheehee.... There are no words....simply none... *tear*

Hey, don't be a jerk. And if you're not going to critique it, don't comment.

The last two stanzas were excellent, as were some of the first. However, the first stanzas don't even suggest that it was rape. and I don't like the rhyme "mare."

You slipped into first person the last few sentences, which is annoying. Other than that...decent

Very run-on. The end--very abrupt. The paragraphs--not good. Everytime someone different speaks, you need to change paragraphs. The storyline is decent, though.

Last thing: timjim: never never never never never never never never never tell someone that something they wrote isn't a story. It's not up to you. It's up to the ...

Lol, Crys, I almost feel apologetic for sending you all of that...I meant to break it up. Hmm. If I could only learn how to *edit* posts... THE COOKIE THING ...

Sorry one last thing: It's the little thing in this story that makes it excellent. The bit about the hairspray. The dot under her eye. Her breaking the mirror. Those ...

Haha. You are quite very welcome. :P This is much better. I especially like the added bits. It is excellent like that, now you are only missing one thing: Motive. ...

BTW, you said you are having trouble knowing where this story is going? let me direct you to some GREAT links: Okay I think that's what it is. :P hope ...

I lied. No, not really, but I went and reread it after posting and it was uh...really really good. Lol, sorries. But the first stanza===EXCELLENT! lovely lovely. Sorry for my ...

lovely. just that. never tamper with this, it's too excellent.

2 Beck woke up with a crick in her neck, and rubbed it as she stumbled to the mirror. Oh, wonderful, she thought. There is a zit on my nose. ...

LOL---there are fifteen more pages and I'd be happy to post them. :P I just didn't want to put too much up the first time. Thanks so much for the ...

lol. this made me laugh. Kudos for the first good lotr spoof I've seen