LukeStarkiller

Thanks so much! Really valuable comments, especially coming from someone who hasn't read the novel, since I'd like to make it stand on its own pretty well (although it is ...

I don't, but a quick Google search turned up some parallels to your own story. I really like the idea of a romance-turned horror storyline, and I think that if ...

So then shouldn't it be "Minerva" McGonagall at the beginning? I'm pretty sure that was her name in the books... Entertaining fanfic though!

Re-reading my poem, I completely agree. The first stanza was a very good parody, but after that, everything became too random to be functional as a satire. I'll see if ...

Thanks so much, Rosette. Don't worry; there isn't an underlying message and theme that you're missing. I tried to make this as ambiguous and therefore nonsensical as possible. I completely ...

For starters, thanks so much for these great criticisms. I'm glad that you didn't spare my feelings, and I think you hit on some pretty important problems with this story. ...

Your review did help, actually! I realize now that I should include at least some characterization for the governor, and I will be sure to properly foreshadow the way-too-sudden appearance ...

Thank you so much for your kind words and areas to improve. I'll make sure to include your comments in my edit.

Thanks so much for pointing those things out. I didn't realize the first time around how sleazy the governor came off as and the plothole with Wilcox, and I actually ...

Thanks so much for your critiques! I realize now that the ending can be a bit unclear. The point I was trying to make was that the drug doesn't actually ...

Thanks so much for your critiques! I realize now that the ending can be a bit unclear. The point I was trying to make was that the drug doesn't actually ...

Thanks for reviewing! Interestingly enough, all three of your critiques were things I struggled with when I was writing this. 1) I thought about putting it in the essay category, ...

Thank you so much for your comments. I definitely agree with your issues with the pacing; I wrote this in the span of about 7 hours on a whim, and ...