Loose

Well, I admit I'm a bit nervous. Heh. Anyway, this is the latest Shiny New Idea. By all means rip it apart. Challenge accepted! Faro sat in the back of ...

Yayayayayay! Chapter twoooo! I am liking where this is going, dear. So much potantial. The sweet and innocent new student being taken away by the nasty pasty "cool" girls. A ...

All right, dear. I think pandapez got most of the nit-picking stuff out of the way. I want to talk about that first paragraph there. **cracks knuckles** You spend the ...

That was quite a cute story. However, I did have a few problems with it. You use the term "murk" and "murky" quite a few times. I suggest pulling out ...

Snoinkus, I love you, but I have to admit that I found this piece a little dry. In my opinion (and odds are no one else will agree since you ...

In my honest opinion, I felt this was way too dialogue dependant. It starts off cute, but after a while the "cram the story full of dialogue and keep description ...

I completely know where you're coming from and I don't usually get that with poetry. That's why I don't read it. But I understand this and I agree with it. ...

Oblivious to Saints comment of there "not being much here", I liked this. The metaphor of his friends being reflections really came through, and I felt this piece was heartfelt ...

Haha! I liked this, Razie, and I can't wait for more. Vince seems like the most adorably devilish character. I have a problem with what I assume is a prologue. ...

Ok, Pingi... As I mentioned before, it isn't really defined. My first opinion was that there was some sort of crazy bus crash or something. I know that you want ...

Wow, Black Cat. This was amazing. It was a very poetic and sensual way to describe what I'm going to guess is a bushfire? One little thing: The embers will ...

Aurora Addison 17 - Quiet - Shy - Always reading - Not very open You shouldn't be telling us that. You should be showing us. If you feel you get ...

Ok, I have a few complaints... Apparently, so back to more important I think that between "apparently" and the rest of the sentence, there should be more of a pause ...

This piece seems incomplete. You begin talking of a task set before the MC, then you talk about how they travel, then you introduce us to a conversation they had, ...

Wow... ok... . Signs of a brief struggle were evident, but the assailant had won, and her grandfather was dead for three days before a neighbor found him. Adrian shuddered ...