Kafkaescence

I wasn't sure I liked chapter this *quite* as much as the first. You sounded rushed, more rushed than you needed to be, considering how much there was to be ...

Alright! I'm totally going to do this. I'll try for one review a day, so hopefully this won't be too long. Still - ten's a daunting number. >.> This is ...

Bonjour. I haven't read any of the other reviews, so I apologize if I repeat anything. I don't think I've ever reviewed anything of yours; it was, needless to say, ...

She looks just like him , (Italicized so that we know that it is an actual thought, and that "I think" is not simply parenthetical.) I think as they take ...

DreamWalker pretty much nailed it. Poetry is an art in itself. It is an art that yearns to be explored, dissected, experimented with. It is an art that craves metaphor; ...

Joshua! Sorry it's taken me so long. I've been busy, what with school starting up and all. This was a very intriguing story. Your grammar and phrasing could be touched ...

Juliet’s sister-in-law Rella giggles at this practice, because Charming is so entirely different in her eyes. But Juliet knows her twin brother, knows how he dreams and loves him for ...

Here as requested! I think a nitpick review will serve my purposes best here. I killed a lamb last week. See, you say this, and it's a great first sentence ...

His body shook as the ice-cold rain pelted his skin and clothing. It wasn't helping that his finger was on the trigger to a gun that would end a life ...

There is a stone slab resting on the couch of apartments. The stone slab and the couch are referred to time and time again throughout your poem, so I think ...

Hi. I'll be blunt. If I picked up some book in a library and read this, I would stop reading the novel and think nothing of it. I'm not saying ...

I'll say that your writing has promise, and that I'm excited to see where it goes and where it will take you. However, I'll also say that, at the moment, ...

I herded the sheep into the pen. Not an entirely drawing beginning. To give you my clichéd advice, try describing the herding of the sheep. Your beginning will be that ...

This is, er, quite the piece of writing you have here, Shad. I guess I'm not entirely sure what to think of it. Like other reviewers have said, it was ...

This all sounded a bit rushed, didn't it. Yes: to describe a scene as large, as intense as this, it takes time, otherwise your diction ends up ends up sounding ...