Jetpack

Back again, for another review. I'm stalking your novel. 8) “I’m sure,” I grumbled at the boy. “Today is your first big assignment.” I don't think you can really "grumble ...

Another great read; this is shaping up so well. I'm also unsure about the start of the chapter, though. It's too repetitive; the problem with the structure you're using is ...

I'm also slightly lost as to where the conflict is here. It doesn't have to be literal; perhaps elaborate on Sleeping Beauty's death by wax tears. You could make the ...

Hey, TSW. Here's a belated welcome to YWS. I've read the first chapter and now this, and I have to say, you have me hooked. I'll try to cover the ...

Hi, ziggiefred. I'm in awe of your prolific reviewing, so when I saw this, I thought I'd comment. As always, nitpicks and grammar concerns are first, followed by some general ...

Welcome to YWS! I read over the first half of this chapter the other day and meant to give you a review, but it seems that you've had a couple ...

Hey, Jet here for a review. Nitpicks first, and then some more general comments. I wasn't a complete freak, I laughed and had crushes and acted like a silly teenager ...

Hey, Leilani! I love your username. Welcome to YWS. I'm here as requested for a review. Nitpicks Haha. I’m Ted Riley. And this is 94.1.” Love. I hate love. Never ...

This is the first time I've done this kind of review in a long while. My corrections and suggestions are in bold . The troopers soon all woke up, and ...

Chapter 1, here we go. Nitpicks The vehicle rattled on the desert floor. The ground was hard and almost nothing grew. I'm not in love with this opening: two very ...

Yuri's given you a great review above, so I think my job has been reduced. Here as requested, though, and I'll give you a general review. Description This mainly concerns ...

If you have a novel to post, there's a whole "Romantic Novels" forum where you can do so. As a heads up, as well, this is pretty long for one ...

You see, don't worry I also just figured this out, when ever you have an ending to a sentence (past the end quotation mark) the words to come are not ...

As a quick note, I wouldn't start off by explaining what's going to happen. As it is, I can't judge how effective you were in making your point because I ...

I really enjoyed this, actually. It's quite refreshing to read something that isn't about love at first sight, but a relationship that just isn't working out anymore. The setting of ...