JacobMoor

Hey, Tikaya, thankyou so much for the review! I've really got no idea what's with the shoes, ngl - as for that 2nd last sentence you pointed out, I'm not ...

Thanks so much for the advice, Dom! That really helps - I am still weirdly vague on the inner workings of this particular protagonist, it's a bit opaque to me ...

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Hi, Airback, congrats on your first submission here! Really like the way you set up the first paragraph and create the scene, the extra details with the deoderant and the ...

Thankyou, glad you enjoyed it!

Hi, Pandoradoomer! Thanks for the review, really appreciate it. You have a point about the man-made objects, thank you for pointing that out - I wouldn't have noticed that otherwise. ...

Okay, cool! Yeah, sorry, I misread that jabber mock bit, that's actually really clever

Cheers Chris! Thanks for the review

Thanks, Callie! Nah, you weren't too harsh, the feedback was really helpful. I'm glad you enjoyed reading it!

Cheers, mate! Thanks for the review. Now that I think about it, Charlie setting the thing up would've been a really cool concept - I might have to write him ...

Thankyou!

Thanks, Jade! That was really helpful

Hey, AngelLily! Thanks for asking me to review your story, this is really good. I like the way it starts off - it can be hard trying to balance story ...