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Re: For a Friend
The promised critique: Nit-Picks It was a thing that she had dearly bought, though not with money. Thing? Ew. Find a different word. She stopped. She found the phrase that ...
Aug 14, 2008 -
Re: Pandora's Box
*Boogies* You know I love you, Snoink, and I'm super excited to read this. XD I already read the first part, up to 'looks like', and I looove it! *Glee* ...
Aug 14, 2008 -
Re: Pretty Butterfly
The promised critique: Nit-Picks He really should not be at that place. Should be: 'He really should not have been at that place.' At his age boys do not care ...
Aug 14, 2008 -
Re: The Watchers
The promised critique: Overall Comments Hmm… it's not your best work, Con. And you made the same mistakes over and over again, so I think an overall would benefit you ...
Aug 14, 2008 -
Re: Never Worn
The promised critique: Nit-Picks We get so lonely anymore. Grammar mistake – I can't fix it 'cause I don't know what you meant, but look at it. within it. Then, ...
Aug 12, 2008 -
Re: Thanatos
Hey ProfessorRabbit! Thanks so much for entering the CIA contest. Yours was a very nice read, and definitely original. However, I'm a lazy bum. So I'm gonna put this in ...
Aug 12, 2008 -
Re: Casting Shadows Prologue [Edited.]
Here's your critique for entering CIA's grammar contest. Jabbs will give you one shortly. So, I'm a lazy-bum, okay? I'm too lazy to do nit-picks here. So open up that ...
Aug 7, 2008 -
Re: Du Og Meg
Here's your critique for entering CIA's grammar contest. Nit-picks are attached 'cause I'm a lazy bum. XD Hmm... actually, this isn't gonna count as a critique, is it? But it ...
Aug 7, 2008 -
Re: Teacup: Tam Aged Twelve
Not a promised critique, but I figured I'd read this part, too. She’s never been in a house before. You need to make it more obvious that she lives in ...
Aug 3, 2008 -
Re: Faerie Wings- Tam: Aged Eight
The promised critique: Helen went all the way to Galway to the clothes bank and found her some things. Tam doesn’t much like dressing up, but she lets Mam this ...
Aug 3, 2008 -
Re: The Statement
Here comes the promised critique: He turned and kicked his computer, hard. That couldn’t do it or anything else any good, but it felt good to him. He was frustrated. ...
Aug 3, 2008 -
Re: Duncan's Death
Nit-Picks The last time I saw Duncan before the accident was the night of our father's arrest. Duncan had fought with me about [s]dad's [/s] Dad's case[s],[/s] ; he didn't ...
Jul 28, 2008 -
Re: His Mind.
Nit-Picks My mind won’t leave me alone! Ditch that exclamation point. I’ll give every happy thought, every happy moment I ever had before that day. All you give me is ...
Jul 28, 2008 -
Re: Journal of a factory worker
Hello! Overall Comments I'm not going to give you a nit-pick, because you can easily catch any mistakes you made and nothing jumped out at me. So! First things first. ...
Jul 28, 2008 -
Re: Not Alone.
Okay, so I was talking to Sade, and I told him to pick a number between one and eight. He chose seven, which meant I was going to critique science-fiction. ...
Jul 28, 2008