Indianwarrior12

Thanks! I'm not used to writing first person, so I kept switching back and forth on the past and present tense thing, but I think I have it now. Also, ...

This is a very good story and i enjoy reading it. but there some things that you could do to make it read smoother. i noticed a lot of run ...

this is a very good story. im really good at nit picking and i really cant find much to nit pick. i would really enjoy reading more of it.

That's a very good story and I would like to see more of it, but you could introduce the character a little more, like what's her name (or his)? I ...