Hippie

Great portrayal of Jack's fear. So he's got some sort of psychological disorder where he's scared of going outside. Then why did his brother ask him to come outside to ...

One thing that struck me was how the shopkeeper started trying to sell them romance novels the moment they walked in. Usually shopkeepers don't do that. If someone's in a ...

I presume LM Montgomery is a classical novelist. To be honest, I think you need to get rid of the old fashioned voice. There's a good reason that writing these ...

Alright. Firstly I'll say that I'm not a fan of breaking the fourth wall - i.e. when the narrator speaks to the reader and seems to have a personality. The ...

This is excellent writing. Although the characters do seem slightly generic, you more than make up for that with setting and atmosphere. The pacing was just right too. I'm sure ...

Every coming generation brings along hope to make the world a better place and to get rid of poverty once and for all in vain. This doesn't make sense. I ...

I do like the setting of WW1 trenches. From what I've seen in movies and read, it was a terrible place to be. What I don't like so much, is ...

I think you've got a great scene here. Apart from going over it for sentence structure (you missed a few words in some places), I think some more description would ...

I've already said The Handmaid's Tale, but I just read something nearly as bad. It was Area 7 by Matthew Reilly. If you want to know how bad it is, ...

The plot thickens! Another great chapter. I like this idea of "controlled reincarnation" and look forward to seing where it takes them. “Yes, I do. Well, not all of it, ...

Hello again. Thanks for your reviews. Lets see if I can help you out as well. Let's start with characters. I'd like to see some more individuality between Kevin and ...

I'm loving the characters here, especially Thomas, and Lola is highly intriguing. Her being an albino is a great, unique touch. The description of the proffessor at the start is ...

This is fantastic! I wanted to give you a review, since you gave me one, but there isn't anything to change. I guess I could do a few nitpicks. He ...

I think this could do with a little more description. What does the inside of the dark wing look like? What's the kids spy academy look like? etc. Also a ...

Looks like the nitpicks have already been done, so I'll just tell you my general impression. Firstly, I think you need to be more clear about the Black Wing. At ...