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  • Short Story » General, General Re: Victims of Violence

    Thanks for the advice folks. I'll sort it out to make it less confudling. Thanks again

    Oct 26, 2005
  • Short Story » General, General Re: Victims of Violence

    I've changed the "he" to "my stepfather" that should sort it. I've never read a book called "a child called it" who wrote it?

    Oct 25, 2005
  • Short Story » General, General Re: Victims of Violence

    ??? the headmaster didn't kill anybody, he simply got Johnny refered to Social Services and his stepfather went to jail. No one died.

    Oct 25, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Apprentice One

    OK, English homework done Nothing wrong with the idea or the story as far as i can tell, flows really well, but something needs to happen, as Griffin said or ...

    Oct 21, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Apprentice One

    I think someone would claim copyright to that idea Griff. I'll be back to critic this soon, just after i've finished my English homework...

    Oct 13, 2005
  • Article / Essay » Review, General Re: The Classics- Recommendations

    darn it, Peter Pan was published in 1911, so if you wait 6 years you could do a report on it then, The Three Musketeers was first published in 1844.

    Aug 30, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Action / Adventure, General Re: Prologue to The Lady Spy

    No, dont edit it, i just thought it was strange thats all, that a Male would think the character was male, and the female would think it was a female.

    Aug 5, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Action / Adventure, General Re: Prologue to The Lady Spy

    Thanks for the advice, thats really useful as i dont normaly write Prologue's so i'll take the advice to heart. I'll most likely change the bit about depth charges, it ...

    Aug 4, 2005
  • Article / Essay » Review, General Re: Deadly Doses

    When i first got Deadly Doses, when ever my parents annoyed me, i used to go get it and read it, saying aloud some interesting symptoms.... Anyway 1) Scene of ...

    Aug 2, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Hamstring's First Birthday

    Miss thankyou. but dont worry, your not the first to make that mistake.

    Jul 26, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Daughter of Kalmonder - Chapter 2

    IT WORKED!!!! *jumps up and hugs Snoink* Thats been bugging me for ages, thank you!! We have Italics!

    Jul 18, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: The Fantasy Writer: Chapter One

    I think Snoink caught all the error's. I enjoyed reading it and it made me giggle at some points, it appealed to my sence of humour. This is going somewhere, ...

    Jul 17, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Daughter of Kalmonder - Chapter 2

    *hurriedly feels forehead for trance of fever* no grammer mistakes? wow, thats rare, im gonna edit now and little green lines will pop up everywere. Thanks for the critic Eloere, ...

    Jul 17, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Daughter of Kalmonder - Chapter 2

    Sorry the italics are not working, again...

    Jul 3, 2005
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: Ann Ross ( a Cinderella Story) II

    This is very Cinderella and Little Princess, but i like it. It's a happy ending "awwww" type thingy with an extra twist at the end, Cinderella being real. Its another ...

    Jun 30, 2005


not to be woke but i just can't go around eating houses
— chi