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Earthfire713

  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Winter Chapter 1

    Welcome to YWS! First of all, great job on this. The imagery was beautiful and I could visualize it really well. My suggestions: Surrounded by the forest that was holding ...

    Dec 31, 2010
  • Novel / Chapter » Science Fiction, General Re: S.N.I.P.E.Rs Prologue

    Wow. That is a really unique way to write a prologue. Great job! That would be so creepy to listen to that on the phone. Anyways, I found a nitpick ...

    Jul 30, 2010
  • Short Story » Fanfiction, General Re: The Forest Again (through Voldemort's eyes)

    Hey, Enigma! I really liked this story. The description was wonderful and I could picture what was going on vividly. My only comment is that it seems...too like the book, ...

    Jul 4, 2010
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: Never a Happy Ending

    Hi silentpages! Wow. This was amazing. So sad, but amazing. You did such a great job at pulling at our heartstrings and retelling this story of the "Little Mermaid". Sorry, ...

    May 29, 2010
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: All A Bit Too Freaky Deaky (Prologue)

    Hi FreakyDeaky! I'm Earthfire, and I'll be your reviewer today. I really liked this story. It's original and the beginning caught my attention right away. :smt001 Great job! The only ...

    May 26, 2010
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Antheya Chapter One

    Hi LauraElizabeth! I'm Earthfire and I'll be your reviewer. First of all: Bravo! :smt001 This was a really interesting story which drew me right in. I love how you kept ...

    May 25, 2010
  • Novel / Chapter » General, General Re: Adrenaline

    Hi RiverStar! That was beautiful. I loved how you described everything so poetically, it just brought the image of the story to my mind. There are just a few things ...

    May 23, 2010
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: deleted

    Hi LaReina! I really liked this story. You made it seem authentic and just right for the time period that you're writing about. The only suggestion that I have is ...

    May 23, 2010
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: Neyri

    Hello! This story was cool. I really liked how you described the creature. I just have a few nitpicks that I found: Jamie could just see a muscular tail propping ...

    May 22, 2010
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Running Away

    Hi KAH! I'm Earthfire. I'm not really good at reviewing poetry, but I'll give this a try. I've read the book Crispin, by the way, so I think it's cool ...

    May 21, 2010
  • Short Story » General, General Re: The Popsicles

    Hi RainWanderer! I'm Earthfire and I'll be your reviewer today. This story made me laugh. I love over-dramatizing everyday stuff too. Great job! :smt001 I didn't see the word "hot" ...

    May 19, 2010
  • Short Story » Historical Fiction, General Re: Rosebushes [p.2/2]

    Hi! I really liked this story. You were telling it in a "proper" voice which added to the effect. :smt001 Great job! The only thing I was wondering about was ...

    May 19, 2010
  • Novel / Chapter » Fanfiction, General Re: Warriors: From SIlver Light and Grey Dark: Chapter 1

    Hi Allessandre! I'm Earthfire and I'll be your reviewer today. First of all, I just want to remind you about punctuation. You forgot to put apostrophes and periods in some ...

    May 18, 2010
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: Avarice

    Hi! This was really cool. I don't think I would be able to do that sort of challenge. The only thing that I would suggest doing is making it more ...

    May 18, 2010
  • Article / Essay » General, General Re: Deadly Jealousy

    This was a really good essay. Great job! :smt001 The only thing that I would suggest is explain the plot of "Othello" at the beginning for those who haven't read ...

    May 18, 2010


Go and make interesting mistakes, make amazing mistakes, make glorious and fantastic mistakes. Break rules. Leave the world more interesting for your being here.
— Neil Gaiman