CSheperd

It was pretty good. You pointed out your own vocabulary so the only thing i will say on that is it just doesn't mesh with your style of writing very ...

The only problem I had with your story is I'd actually like to read more. I think it's pretty unique simply for the fact i can't say I've read anything ...

I have to say I had a hard time finishing the story, it needs quite a few quotations and you should probably think about breaking dialogue off from the paragraphs. ...

I liked how the story took place with in the whole span of a T-10 countdown and the descriptiveness and imagery was very good. As for the plot, it was ...