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Re: Lyla. Part 7
I just can't stay away: Da-ja-vu hit me as I shuffled through his front door; the ghost of myself three months ago lingered. I think it's 'déjà vu'. Weird spelling ...
Jul 13, 2008 -
Re: Lyla. Part 6
Hi, it's me again! That was a man in a suit that was stood behind me. There was a man in a suit, standing behind me. and he goes how ...
Jul 13, 2008 -
Re: Lyla part 5
Hi again! myself in the mirror, psyching myself Repetition here=bad. than dad Capitalise the first‘d’. In fact I noticed this error a few times. A year on I'm sure you've ...
Jul 13, 2008 -
Re: Lyla. Part 4
Hey once again! As I said before, the flashbacks are working brilliantly. I'm just loving the way you have some narrative, then a recollection of the past to add along ...
Jul 13, 2008 -
Re: Lyla. Part 3
Hey Alainna, This was a lovely piece, and already I can see your writing improving. The flashback is working very well, a great build up. At the moment though, I ...
Jul 13, 2008 -
Re: Lyla. Part 2.
Hello again! There was far less to say here, and in terms of character development I think the pacing is just right, but again, I think a dramatic opening would ...
Jul 13, 2008 -
Re: Lyla. Part 1
Hi Alainna! I’m going to try and get through all of Lyla, it looks like a good story and I need something to read. So far, this isn’t bad and ...
Jul 13, 2008
