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BlackDove

  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: The Wanderings (v2!)

    “True enough, but ye forget I have years of experience on my side mate I am sure you mean “but YOU forget” I am not sure Garret would be posh ...

    Apr 5, 2007
  • Novel / Chapter » Action / Adventure, General Re: Fear of the dark.

    from the flash from the muzzles of their weapons. A bit clumsy, you could try to reverse it. and pushed his chin down and brought his knife across the man's ...

    Apr 3, 2007
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: The Wanderings (v2!)

    with brown shoulder length hair and brown eyes approached this is a bit repetitive. Try to use a different word than brown greying brown hair, brown eyes, again, “brown” must ...

    Apr 3, 2007
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Tamia's quest part I and II

    “He panted with pain” this doesn’t seem the right word to me. I would be yelling “a grin borne from blood lust while he reached for his long dirk. “ ...

    Mar 24, 2007
  • Poetry » Narrative, General Re: Himdil

    wow, this was really good I really enjoyed it alot. it was like something you read in one of those epic poetry books. not really my taste, poetry, but this ...

    Mar 22, 2007


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