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Re: Mistake (Part 1)
The question I kept asking as I read this story excerpt was "Why is she telling him this?" I wouldn't start the story with this conversation, but just before it. ...
Oct 7, 2010 -
Re: At Our Tea Shop
Hey I'm critiquing your story now. First of all the spelling mistakes were very distracting so I took the liberty of running this story through spellcheck before reading it. But ...
Oct 5, 2010 -
Re: Journey To A New World
Hey I'm BadNarrator and I'll be reviewing your story today. As I approach the mysterious object with anticipation, a shiver of excitement runs down my spine. It was early morning, ...
Oct 4, 2010 -
Re: Karp, Liver, Caviar, and Hell
Uh...I usually try to avoid critiquing stories like these but I guess I can take a crack at it. Once upon a time there was a enigmatic little imp named ...
Oct 3, 2010 -
Re: I Saw Nothing
Laden with ice and swaying in the bitter Alaskan wind the pines crackled in an eerie orchestra that could be mistaken for the thrashing and snapping of a wild animal's ...
Oct 3, 2010 -
Re: My Friend Teno
A tragic loss of a friend. Ernest Hemingway said that every great story should include a death. I think it was Hemingway who said that. Anyway, despite the need for ...
Oct 3, 2010 -
Re: My Worst Memory
Despite its length I found this story to be very intriguing. Unfortunately it is lacking in description which is always important for shorter stories. Here are my suggestions: MY WORST ...
Sep 29, 2010 -
Re: Story of a Teenage Theif
So first of all I want you to ignore all the complaints in the posts above me about people whining about the length of the story. Nothing annoys me more ...
Sep 28, 2010 -
Re: A Theft
I've got mixed feelings about the narrative mode you've chosen for the story. On the one hand I pretty much hate all 2nd person narrators, but on the other it ...
Sep 27, 2010 -
Re: Daffodilly Reborn [edited, but not yet rewritten]
I enjoyed this story. I generally don't care for the lyrical writing style but I think you pulled it off very well. In all there are very few things I ...
Sep 27, 2010
