-KayJuran-

What makes the perfect slice of cheese? Thick enough to get the flavor Thin enough to melt on a slice of toasted bread Only the Finnish cheese slicer can perform ...

I don't understand... Do you mean this is something you've written yourself, or are we supposed to guess where it's come from? If it's the latter, then it should be ...

Hm, not sure if you still need help with this or not, but.... As of yet, I am still unsure of my final destination. Having immensely enjoyed both Law and ...

Bearskin wrapping belly caveman rises from fire dunking a stick into and taking it away from he stands erect like metal black beard blossoms cheek and arches it all the ...

Wow, this is actually quite creepy... Is she supposed to be going mad or are there actually voices there? The impression I'm getting is that it's either supposed to be ...

Couldn't find a lot wrong with it grammatically. Just one or two things I should mention: I'm often told that love is the best, feeling to have deep in your ...

Trident makes a good point. Imagery and metaphors could add a lot of depth to this. At the moment, it's nice, but just nice... I really think you can make ...

It's not so much that it's too long exactly... it's just that it's currently very hard to read and therefore critique due to it's format. But don't worry! All you ...

Just a rough effort. The story should be posted soon. These are lyrics for a song, right? So I'm guessing from this part ^ that it would be part of ...

Normally, I'd rather the capitalisation and punctuation were there, but because of the shortness of the poem, it works as it is. =) The French really interests me as well ...

Some formatting tips! =D It all started one Saturday when John heard footsteps coming down the stairs. This should not even be put into a script. It's fine in a ...

I like the 'I' and 'you' that you use here. It makes it more personal for me, and it's also something I've never been so good at myself. The meaning ...

Argh! I feel bad everytime I see people post crits... as I'm reminded how I still haven't done it yet. *hides face in shame* Mind if I skip to my ...

'Fraid I can't give a proper critique at the moment, but there is one thing that jumped out at me: “Autistic”. That’s what they said I was and used it ...

Right, here goes... [Just to warn you, I usually critique prose rather than poetry, but I'll try and be as constructive as possible. :) ] Hehe, first of all, I ...