Revolution Of The Gifted

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I am a beginner author, and this is the first story I have written that I think is worthwhile writing. Please review! :D


Brennan meant tears or sorrow. This was the first and the only significant thing that his father ever told him. His father had died of a rare disease when Brennan had been 10—at the same age when Brennan found out he that had special powers. Now, six years late Brennan was starting to fully understand them.
As the men closed in and blocked the exit of the dark alley, Brennan focused his mind on what his name meant. Immediately one of the men started crying hard: he was remembering the saddest event in his life, and Brennan doubled the anguish the man had felt. Brennan summoned the man’s tears and made them float through the air and solidify before falling into his hands as metal tears.
Brennan looked at one of the men and a tear shot out of his hand, zooming through the air towards the man’s chest. The tear hit its mark and sank deep into his chest, piercing his heart. The man crumpled like aluminum can under a giant weight. "Want some of this?” Brennan smiled threateningly at the rest of the men as their cocky smiled twisted into looks of shocked fear.
They scattered and Brennan let them go, not wanting to kill someone else. As they left, Brennan felt the rush of a fight leave him. Remorse at yet another death he’d caused, Brennan sighed. He looked around himself and walked slowly onto the main street, then quickly turned down another alley. He reached his shelter, which consisted of a sleeping bag and a stolen shopping cart that held his meager belongings. It was a luxurious house—for the gutter.
After his father died, Brennan had been kicked out of his cozy house when the bank foreclosed it. Brennan had known what was coming: foster care. Running away was the easiest option for someone like him. With that memory fresh in Brennan’s mind, he sat down and settled into a deep, troubled sleep.
Around 300 miles away, a small military buggy carrying 6 US military officers zoomed at 100 miles an hour to where a satellite said Brennan was. The military had been tracking people like him, trying to recruit them into their special forces.
Brennan was woken by the sound of footsteps. Before he could hide, someone spoke. “We know you’re there. Don’t go, we’re not trying to hurt you. We’re one of your kind.” Brennan paused, unsure about what they might mean. As far as he knew, no one had powers like him. He peered into the darkness, trying to see the speaker. There seemed to be some sort of mist around the speaker.
She spoke again. “Yes, we do have powers like you. And yes, I’m reading your mind. All of our kind can communicate telepathically if we’re within a certain range of each other.” There she went again, talking about ‘their kind’. What was this? Was she really reading Brennan’s mind?
Brennan stayed silent and finally the mist shrank and took on a form, solidifying into a boy. Brennan was too shocked to even take in what was going on. Three figures moved into the dim light the moon provided. They looked worn down, but otherwise they seemed like normal kids. The same girl as before spoke, moving forward. “We have powers, just like you.” Her dark brown hair glinted in the moonlight, but what really struck Brennan were her eyes: they seemed to glow with their own dark green light.
“Yeah right.” Brennan was incredulous, but he already knew that she had to be telling the truth. How else would she have been able to read his mind or even known that he had powers?
“We do.” This time the mist boy spoke.
“I need more proof.” Brennan was stalling, trying to decide if he could trust these people.
“Fine, we’ll give you proof.”
The boy turned to a fine black mist, and the black cloud of mist shaped itself into the shape of the boy. Then the mist solidified next to Brennan.
The girl who had first spoken smiled at Brennan and then turned herself into pure steel. The third boy shrugged at Brennan, who was staring in shock. “She does that sometimes. I’m telekinetic.” He reached out an arm and one of the bricks on the floor of the alley floated towards him.
Next to the telekinetic boy, the girl returned to normal. “So, yeah. We have powers like yours. We’re with a group of rebels—people like us who are resisting the government.”
Brennan was completely confused. “The government?” He’d never had anything to do with the government.
The mist boy’s face darkened. “Yes, the government. They’re trying to recruit us into some sort of Special Forces army—they want to make America the strongest country in the world.” He said it angrily, and Brennan could tell that this wasn’t the only grudge the boy held against the government.
The telekinetic added on to what the mist boy said. “They are taking people like us, with gifts, and inserting microchips into their brains to control them.”
Brennan gulped—he hadn’t heard anything about this before, not that it was common knowledge among the public. “That’s horrible.”
“Yup. What we do is we rescue them. We’ve a doctor who takes out the microchips.”
Brennan knew what he wanted. “I want to help you.”
“Good.” The metal girl gave an approving smile. “By the way, the military is looking for you.” She said it casually, as though they were used to the military hunting them.
Just then, Brennan noticed some shadows on the wall of the alleyway from the main street. He silently pointed to them and the other kids turned, saw them, and quickly scaled the wall of the nearby restaurant. Just as they got onto the roof, six men came into view.
They looked around the alley and looked up just as Brennan and the others pulled back from the edge. Then they began looking through the things in his cart. Finally they stopped searching, and one said, “Well, he’s obviously not here. We don’t need his powers anyway. There are others.”
"But won't the general be angry? He spent money on our transportation, our funding for the mission, and our supplies. He's going to be pretty damn pissed at us for this." Said another military man, a wiry figure with a thin wisp of hair.
The boy next to Brennan changed into the black mist and floated next to one of the men. He wrapped the man in mist and when the mist unfolded, the man fell to the ground, unconscious. The other men whirled around, but it was too late. One man was dropped with a brick that the telekinetic moved with his mind, and the other was immobilized in his clothes, which had just been turned to metal by the girl.
“Let’s get out of here.” The metal girl examined their handiwork with a grim smile. “By the way, there’s another person we forgot to introduce you to. Kaci, you can become visible now.”
A girl appeared a few meters away from Brennan, looking bored. “Okay.”
“Can you call Jackson, please?” The metal girl asked.
“Yeah, sure. Whatever.” Kaci disappeared.
The mist boy offered an explanation in answer to Brennan’s unspoken question. “Kaci can turn invisible, and there is something called invisible travel which lets the people that can become invisible teleport themselves to any other place in the world, as long as they’ve been there before.” He said nonchalantly, as if he were discussing the weather.
“So, do you guys have a headquarter or something?” Brennan asked, trying to get a little information on where he was going to end up.
“Yes.” Said the mist boy.
“What are your names?” Brennan inquired.
“You know Kaci, the other girl is Lisa, I’m Jace, and the telekinetic boy is Mandik.” Said the mist boy.
“What’s your name?” asked Jace. “Even though we can all read each others’ minds if we want, we can’t find out your name.”
“I’m Brennan. I can control tears and make people sad.”
The effect was immediate. Jace’s face turned pale, and his eyes grew wide. “Don’t control my sadness. Believe me, my sadness without some kid multiplying it was bad enough.”
“I’m sorry about your sister, Jace, but there was nothing you could do. The men who took her were too strong, and you didn’t know how to channel your powers back then.” Brennan said it casually—he’d always understood why people were sad.
Jace gritted his teeth. “Don’t. Talk. About. It.” He said, the threat clear in his menacing tone.
Just then, Kaci reappeared. “Is he causing problems? Because believe me, I can end that very quickly,” She said menacingly, disappearing, and reappearing right next to Brennan’s ear. “Very, very easily.”
“C’mon Kaci, let ‘im be.” Said a voice from behind Kaci’s back. “What’s up?” A mousy, brown haired boy nodded at Brennan. “I’m Jackson. You?”
“Brennan.” Brennan offered, nodding back.
“What do you do?” Jackson looked genuinely curious. “I control water.”
“I can control sorrow, and tears.” Brennan replied.
“Cool.”
“Shall we get going?” asked Lisa impatiently. Brennan cast a glance around the alleyway that had been his home for the last few days and sighed. Life was going to be a lot different.

~~~

Jackson led the way through a maze of buildings and alleyways until finally the group reached the shoreline. They were unaware of the small fishing boat floating in the shadows. The hunched figure on board scrutinized them silently.
Jackson and the other five kids hurried into a boat, and Lisa gunned the motor. Once they were out a fair distance, Jackson raised his hands to the sky. His expression was one of utmost concentration. “He makes that face and does that hand thing to make it more dramatic. This is the easiest thing in the world for him.” Lisa informed Brennan.
Brennan watched Jackson curiously. “Don’t watch him, blockhead, watch the water.” said Kaci. Before Brennan’s wide eyes, the water around the boat started to boil. The bubbles grew bigger and bigger, until Brennan thought the sea god was pouring a bubble bath. Then, an ominous shape started growing beneath the boat.
“That’s creepy.” Said Brennan, his voice trembling. The others said nothing, looking bored. Finally, the black shape reached the ship. Only then did Brennan realize it was an underwater tornado. The boat was sucked inside, and Jackson kept a bubble of air around the boat as they zipped down the tornado’s length.
At the bottom of the tornado, Jackson created a hole in the sand. The boat kept on going, and at the last moment, the boat somehow changed itself into 6 small pods that went one by one into the tunnel, ending up in an under-sand cavern. Brennan released a shaken breath, his nerves completely frayed.
He got out with the others and walked on wobbly legs down the width of a hallway, slowly adjusting. They ended up at a double door. Once inside it, Brennan’s jaw dropped. How was this possible? He was filled with a sense of awe. He was inside a corridor, but a corridor that seemed to be metal and high tech. The rooms on either side where what Brennan would expect a secret service base to be like. Computers, cameras, surveillance, constant codes scrolling across screens, and tons more high tech equipment. “Where do you get the money to pay for all this stuff?” Asked Brennan wonderingly.
“There are adults that are also endowed with powers. Powers usually run in families. So we have tons of families here. And adults give us the funding. A lot of the richest people in the world have powers—their powers help them make so much money.” replied Mandik proudly.
“Oh,” Was the only thing Brennan could think of to say. They continued their walk down the hallway, until they reached a room with a golden plaque with the engraving, “Sector 45, Building C, Room 92, Common Room” Mandik pushed open the heavy double doors, grunting as he did so. Inside, there was a large room filled with kids and adults of all ages. All conversation stopped and everyone stared at Brennan. Brennan shuffled forward uncomfortably, feeling his cheeks turn bright red, and looked at his feet.
A murmur passed through the crowd, and people looked at him strangely. What’s wrong with them? He thought.
We’re just checking out the newbie, don’t worry. A humorous voice rang in his head, making Brennan jump. Right, the telepathic communication. Kaci took over, explaining how they had found him and what had happened. Brennan was accosted by people introducing themselves, but before long he was whisked off for a tour.
He had a dormitory to sleep in and there were bathrooms everywhere. There was an indoor garden, a play room with video game systems, a TV room, a dining room, a library, and a little mall. Brennan soon forgot this was an underwater headquarters for rebels—it looked more like a five star hotel.
Brennan’s favorite room was the training room where people learned to control and manipulate their powers better. Apparently there’d be an attack drill later today. Brennan had no idea what that was, but the name was somewhat self explanatory.
A little later, after Brennan had settled into his room, a loud bell rang. All of a sudden a drawer in one of the walls of his room popped open. When Brennan looked in, there was a special waterproof suit with a pistol in its belt. There was also one small knife, a pack of six grenades, ten ammo packs, and a small UZI. His guide had told him that he’d have to get into a suit that ‘would be provided’, but Brennan hadn’t been prepared for this extreme.
He slipped into the suit and ran out into the hallway. He had noticed that there were little metal shelves sticking out at intervals in the wall. Now, a mechanical sound came from them, and a folded machine gun slowly unfolded itself and a rebel sniper appeared behind it, ready to attack if needed. Following the stream of people, Brennan found himself in a cramped hall and joined one of the many lines.
At the front of the line, he was ushered into a four seater pod with a driver in the front. The co-pilot manned the aiming system for the torpedoes, and it was the passengers’ job to load the torpedoes in, following the instructions written on the sticker above the loading space. The pod sunk, and targets appeared around the pod while the passengers loaded the torpedo tubes with plastic, fake torpedoes. After a quick destruction of the targets, each passenger had to attempt to man the wheel.
Brennan did what was told, completely overwhelmed with all the rapid action around him. Finally, they were let back to their rooms. Brennan noticed the metal shelves emptying of snipers and machine guns, and also noticed the pods sinking back down into the garages. Occasionally the river of people would stop as large rows of mines descended back into the floor. Behind him, someone murmured, “I heard that tomorrow we’re having another attack drill, but this time, it’s a type two.”
Brennan turned around. “What’s a type two?”
“A type one is when we train our skills with the technological weapons. A type two is when we test our skills with our gifts.”
“Cool!” Brennan couldn’t wait to try his skills.
The man slipped back into serious conversation with his friend. Brennan fought his way through the crowd and to his dormitory. There he sat down, returned his clothes and weapons to the wall drawer, and took a shower in the nearest bathroom.
As Brennan thought about what a type two would be like, the hunched figure in the boat was talking through a walkie-talkie. “General, have found the entrance. Roger that.”
“Good, soldier. We can attack in force in approximately a month.”
“Roger.”
“Return to base, now. We’ll need a surveillance camera there.”
“Yes, sir.”
The man slipped back into the shadows, setting up the camera.
Brennan awoke to the sound of boots clomping outside his door. He sat up groggily, his eyelids drooping. He shuffled to the light switch with a yawn, squinting at the fierce light that came from the light bulbs. Once he got dressed in the clothes he’d found in his drawers, he left his room and followed the stream of people crowding the halls. People were streaming towards the dining room.
Brennan let the pull of the line get him through the double doors, and then he grabbed on of the plastic plates that were neatly stacked beside the door. As Brennan scooped up scrambled eggs, bacon, toast, and butter, he scouted for an empty seat. When he found one, he sat down and started on his meal.
A boy sat down next to him and smiled engagingly. “Hey. You’re a new kid, right? I’m Kel.”
Brennan examined Kel: He was a well built red-head with freckles spattered across his nose. “Yeah, I’m new. My name’s Brennan. I was brought here yesterday after the military tried to get me. What can you do?” Brennan couldn’t get over how many people had powers—how did the public not know?
Kel grinned. “I control fire.” He held out a hand and a small flame appeared in his palm.
Brennan stared. “Sick!”
Kel shrugged and the flame disappeared. “Your gift’s pretty cool too.” As he saw Brennan’s confusion, Kel smiled. “Telepathy, remember?”
“Oh, yeah.” Brennan and Kel finished eating quickly.
“Want to go to the training room?” Kel asked as they stood.
“Sure.” Brennan followed Kel’s lead and put away his tray as they left.
They set off down the hallway to one of the ten training rooms. They reached the nearest training room, training room six. The room was split into four by bulletproof glass, with microphones set into the glass so people could talk, but not hurt each other by accident.
Targets appeared around Brennan and he let loose a shockwave of sadness, a physical one. Immediately, the targets were flattened. Then he shot his tears at the targets that popped up in front of him.
“Want to try a solo training?” asked Kel.
“What’s that?”
“It’s when people train alone, so they can do things like destroy the glass, which will automatically replace itself, without having to worry about the other person.” replied Kel, switching to telepathy in the middle of his sentence.
“Sure, I’ll try it.” Brennan answered.
So Kel left the room, and Brennan saw his face appear in a window above him, so he could watch. Brennan smiled and mustered as much sadness as he could, trying to break the glass of his section. He breathed deeply, and forced his hands down, sending out the shockwave. It was so strong Brennan could see it, and so could Kel. The glass of his compartment instantly flew apart and the shockwave continued, smashing the other sheet of glass. Then it struck the wall and the plaster flew apart. The whole wall was vaporized where the shockwave hit it, and the rest crumbled. The shock wave stopped there, but the shards of glass continued on, shredding the walls, some leaving deep marks, others ripping through the wall completely. One whole wall was shredded apart in that one shockwave. The targets had been vaporized instantly, and the machinery that made them pop up was melted away, and some of it had welded itself onto the other pieces, jamming it.
Kel stood above, watching this in awe. A man came running out of a door on the other side of the room, and the glass floated into his hand, and with almost affectionate care, he placed each piece of glass back into the sheet, and welded it back into the sheet. He did the same with the wall, and soon the wall was back to normal.
Kel ran into the room, and looked around the room in shock, probably picturing what it had looked like before. “Your turn,” grinned Brennan.
“Wow,” was all Kel said.
“I didn’t even know I could do that!” exclaimed Brennan.
“I know I won’t be able to do that,” cried Kel, looking disappointed.
“I’m sure you’ll be able to do a lot of damage,” reassured Brennan.
“Thanks,” replied Kel.
So Brennan climbed the stairs to the room where Kel had been watching. He sat down on the provided chair. Kel looked up at him and his hands started to glow red, and he raised his hands to face the glass. He waved his hand dramatically toward the glass, and a large stream of fire burst out. Kel then made the fire curl on itself, and finally it rolled itself into a ball of fire, which Kel sent shooting at the glass. The glass melted quickly, and Kel made the fire spread in a thin layer on the glass, until the glass was in a casing of fire.
A few minutes later, the glass was non-existent. Brennan watched with his eyes wide, and then his jaw dropped as Kel made a giant wall of fire, and smashed it on the floor. The fire spread out like Brennan’s shockwave, except made of fire. Brennan knew two things: He and Kel had each others respect, and Brennan didn’t want Kel as an enemy.

~~~~

A few hours later, a different bell started ringing. It was a lower tone, and to Brennan’s ears it sounded more serious. When he ran out into the hall, the rebels were being lined up. A heavily muscled man put him in one of the lines and Brennan was ordered not to move an inch.
Each line was assigned a position in the building. The slots in the hallway that had been used for snipers yesterday were now manned by Brennan and his team, who watched tensely, waiting for the targets. They appeared around the corner and started moving on a chain that was embedded in the ground.
The world erupted. The man next to him yelled something too high-pitched for Brennan to hear and the two targets in front of him were vaporized. Another waved his hand at one of the targets, making it explode into a million pieces. Kel shot fire balls and Barak, Kel’s friend, aimed streams of lightning at the targets.
A little girl who appeared to be around three years old sneezed innocently and the target in front of her was destroyed by a hail of solidified snot. Another boy across the hallway froze the targets until they were fragile as glass and Mandik used his powers to smash them.
Jace shot clouds of black mist around the targets and when the targets reappeared they were mottled and twisted. Lisa kept reaching into her jar of toothpicks, turning them into metal, and firing them at the targets. Kaci was also destroying them, but Brennan couldn’t see how. He himself sent a hail of metal and flaming tears towards the targets.
Do you know Kaci, Kel? Asked Brennan.
Yeah. She destroys those targets by using the force the invisibles channel. None of the rest of us knows what the force comes from because they refuse to tell, but it always does a considerable amount of damage.
With a newfound respect and fear for Kaci, Brennan returned his focus to the targets. Soon the chain of targets was destroyed, and the room emptied. Brennan was the last one out the door, and when he reached the hallway, it was as busy as a highway at rush hour.
People were stopping to inspect the remains of the targets, so Brennan joined the throngs of spectators. The chains on some places were snapped, and other parts were melted and bent. There were signs of Brennan’s flaming tears, and signs of the normal tears. There were also signs of Lisa’s toothpick war. Jace’s brother had made considerable damage to the workings of the chain, and the targets.
Soon even the hallway was empty, and Brennan was the only one there. He sighed happily, and headed back to his room, the tenseness he had felt during the type two fading away. He collapsed onto his bed, and submitted to the drowsy feeling of sleep, and the darkness edging across his sight.
As he awoke from his nap, he looked at the time. 11:00, it read. Brennan got up quickly, and hurried to the dining room. It was already packed slightly with the early-comers that were looking for good seats. While he was waiting, Brennan decided, he would go to the training room. He hurried down the hallway to the training room, and pushed open the doors. He smiled and looked around at the empty room, ready for use.
Just as he was about to start, Kaci appeared. Each getting over their shock of the unexpected meeting, they started to talk over each other. Finally, Brennan stopped, and Kaci went on. “Hi Brennan, what’s up?” She yelled, her voiced raised because she hadn’t expected Brennan to stop talking. “Oh, nothing much. Just decided to come train before lunch,” He answered, still rubbing his ears, and feeling slightly intrusive.
“Sorry if you were planning to do some solo training, but I needed to loosen up a bit,” She said sheepishly.
“Oh it’s fine, don’t worry,” He cried, feeling very sheepish himself. Awkward he though, trying to release the tension.
I know, seriously She answered her voice filled with relief as the awkwardness left the air.
Which section do you want to take? Asked Brennan courteously.
I’ll take the far left, just so that I don’t get blasted to pieces if you slip-up. She laughed.
Brennan’s cheeks burned as he realized that the story had gotten around.
I’ll take the far right so that you don’t accidentally vaporize me. He shot back, joking.
She smiled and smacked him. OW! That hurt! He cried.
It was supposed to. She replied matter-of-factly.
He stuck out his tongue childishly, and she stuck out her tongue back at him. They moved to the other sides of the room, and stepped into their section. Brennan set his microphone to connect with Kaci’s and tested it’s efficiency by talking into it. “Can you hear me Kaci?” He asked, loudly.
“Yeah, loud and clear,” She replied, also yelling. He winced, and then a sudden thought occurred to him.
“Hey Kaci, do you know how we got our powers? I always thought it was through gene, but my mom and dad never had powers. Wait a minute. I never really knew my mom, she died when I was 3 and my dad never told me about her.” He asked distantly.
“Yeah. Of course I know. It’s like this. You’ve heard of the black plague, right?”
“Yeah,” He replied indignantly.
“Ok. Well, there were two. One in the time that we were still apes, and one in the medieval times. The black plague was a sickness, but more than that, it was a force. There were two forces in it. The bad force, and the good force. The good force was very powerful, and it was hard to be strong enough to stand up to it. But the people who did manage to control the good, became gifted, like us. Some people saw what happened to the people who did get the good, and tried to get it to. Some of them lived, but most of them died.”
“The people with more of the bad had this unexplicable urge to kill everyone with powers. Like Hitler, he was possessed with the bad, and lots of the people he condemmed to death were people with powers. Look at the Nagasaki bombing. The other bombing was an accident, but the people that were driving the plane were possessed by the bad, and the place where they dropped the bomb happened to be the meeting place of the gifted,” She rattled off as though she had recited this a million times.
Brennan had listened without interrupting, but now he said, “This changes my whole way of looking at the world. Are some of the most important or remembered people gifted? Does the good or the bad get passed down through genes?” He was feeling overwhelmed with all that he had just learned, and was bursting with questions.
“Yes to both. Bill Gates, Cleopatra, King Arthur, Ramses, Columbus, and many others. Yes the gifts are passed down through the genes, but only if the good is dominant. If the bad is dominant, the child gets no powers. The child doesn’t always get evil from the bad if the bad is dominant, but it does sometimes,” Kaci added to her last answer.
“What happens if the kid does get evil?” Brennan asked, relieving his mind of another question.
“They get evil, nothing more,” She replied.
“Hmmm,” Murmured Brennan, mulling over what she had said.
Then they both returned their attention to their targets, and spent the rest of the time in silence. Finally though, when Brennan’s stomach was growling like a lion, the gong that signaled the start of lunch rang. Kaci and Brennan dashed to the door, and darted through the gathering crowd, all the way to the dining room.
They found open seats that were conveniently next to each other so they could chat. They talked mostly about the historical figures that had been gifted, until their conversation finally turned to fighting tactics, and then died away. At the moment when Brennan thought that the awkwardness that had been building up was beginning to make the air solid, the seat next to him emptied. The brown-haired woman that had formerly occupied it was now replaced with a blue eyed, brown-haired, and averagely tall boy.
The boy bent over his food and began his attack on his potatoes, and in the middle of a particularly vicious jab from his fork, he noticed Brennan looking at him questioningly. “I’m Jack, who are you?” He asked casually, giving Brennan a quick once-over.
“I’m Brennan, the new guy,” Brennan replied a little to fast.
Kaci had been watching the exchange in amusement, although Brennan wasn’t sure what joke the conversation had triggered in her mind. She spoke now, saying, “And I’m Kaci, you know me right?”
“Uhhh… Nope, I can’t say I have,” His voice was slightly topped with confusion, probably wondering if he was in the presence of an important figure. “But, I can say I have heard of you. Just some small snippits of conversation about the “new kid.”
Kaci muttered something unpleasant about newcomers getting all the attention, followed by a few curse words. Jack turned his attention back to his meal, and followed up his attack on the potatoes with an epic battle between the toughness of the meat, and the sharpness of Jack’s knife. The pork eventually gave way, and Jack’s plate was soon empty, save a few pieces of pork scraps.
“Wanna go to the training room?” Suggested Brennan.
“Sure, why not?” Jack replied.
So they got up from their seats, and Brennan saw Kaci sneaking a few chocolate chip cookies from her neighbors plate before he turned the corner to the hallway. Down the hallway they headed, avoiding the desperate people that dashed toward the dining room, who were trying not to miss the meal.
The pair reached the training room without any incidents, and entered it with ease. A man with a ridiculously large moustache was just exiting as they entered. After recovering from the fit of laughter that assailed them at the sight, and from the indignation of the man, they entered different sections.
Brennan had warmed up and was just going to start the flow of targets when Jack said, “Check this out.” Brennan looked over obediently, and Jack was there with a pile of needles he had somehow aqquired. Jack stared at the needles for a moment, and then at a target, and the needles promptly disappeared and reappeared in the target’s bulls eye.
“Awesome!” Exclaimed Brennan in awe, feeling completely amazed.
Jack shrugged modestly, “It was nothing.”
“IT WAS NOTHING!!!???” Cried Brennan incredeously. “That was one of the coolest things I’ve seen in my life!”
“Yeah right,” Retorted Jack, looking embarrassed. Brennan rolled his eyes at the barely concealed pride, and grinned at Jack.
“Watch this,” Brennan nodded at Jack, feeling pumped. He mustered a sizable amount of tears, and shot them toward the tears in a wide beam of flaming wooden tears. They pierced the targets, and then stuck there, as Brennan had not applied much force. There they spread their fires across the targets, burning them from the core. The fire was soon put out by a sprinkler that turned on, probably put there specifically to put out fires on the targets.
“Now that’s something cool!” Exclaimed Jack, watching Brennan squeeze himself into a corner of his section, trying not to get soaked. Jack watched in amusement while Brennan glared at the sprinkler silently. Then Brennan heard Jack’s muffled laughter, and then his glare was pointedly aimed at Jack.
The sprinkler soon stopped spraying, many thanks to a passing maintenance man who saved the day from the training room’s control room. Brennan stood in the center of his section, thoroughly soaked even though he had put lots of effort into staying dry.
Brennan continued glaring at Jack for a few seconds, then his chin trembled, he snorted a few times, and finally burst into an unstoppable spasm attack of laughter. Jack joined in, and a bemused janitor rushed into the room, scratching his head as he watched two sixteen year old boys doubled over, laughing outrageously. Shaking his head, he slipped out the door, and the boys stared after him, still in hysterics.
“Why were we laughing?” Asked Brennan, not completely sure if he was still completely sane.
“I’m not sure, but that janitor’s face was so frickin’ funny!” Answered Jack, getting off the floor.
“I don’t know how Kel turned off the sprinklers, but he certainly found a way!” Exclaimed Brennan. But Jack’s attention was fixed on the sprinkler itself. Brennan turned to look at it, and saw to his surprise, it was dripping red.


“I hope that’s not blood,” Was the first thing Brennan said.
“That’s what I was thinking,” Replied Jack.
“We should call maintenance,” Said Brennan.
“Ok,” Confirmed Jack, happy to do something.
The maintenance team came two minutes later, and immediately interrogated Brennan about what had happened. Brennan told the story, and the maintenance man kept silent until the end, when one of the men said, “The sprinkler pipes lead to the main tank, and that has a pipe leading off that sucks in water from the sea and cleans it. Maybe something dead is caught in the grate that’s in front of the gate.”
“Good thinking, lets go check it out. You kids can come, if you want,” Said a different man, probably the leader. Brennan and Jack followed the maintenance crew down the hall, drawing curious glances from the other passerbys. Brennan shrugged at them, and kept on moving. They all reached a large room filled with diving suits, and Brennan and Jack found suits for themselves. Then they headed down the corridor again, and as Brennan thought about how he felt like an austronaut, one of the men turned the heavy wheel that opened the door, and they were in. It was large and made entirely out of metal, and Brennan felt like he was in an aluminum can ready to be squashed. Not a good feeling.
The room started filling with water, and a door at the other side of the room opened slowly. The sea was there in front of Brennan, and it was gorgeous. Sunlight filtered through the water in great sheets, illuminating the water even at this depth. The coral swayed with the current like a palm tree swaying in a gentle breeze. The fish swam about lazily, and the whole scene had a peaceful sort of aura.
Brennan noticed the rest of the group ahead of him, and swam fast to catch up. The rusty color of the pipe was beginning to show, and soon the whole pipe was revealed. The end of the pipe was near, so Brennan swam ahead, trying to get a closer look. He found that the grate covering the pipe was untouched, and nothing was there. The rest of the crew had caught up by then, and one of the men pointed at the ground, frowning grimly. Brennan gulped, and forced himself to look down. Blood flowed in small streams from deep gashes in the body. The lead maintenance man flipped over the body, and Jackson stared at Brennan, his pale face contorted into a grimace of pure fear and dawning realization.
Brennan’s eyes widened, and Jackson stared back, his lifeless eyes seeming to draw the strength out of Brennan. The maintenance men recovered quickly, and grabbed Jackson’s body by the arms and the legs. Jack just stared at Brennan, his eyes telling exactly what he felt. Brennan’s mind was in turmoil, and one moment was seared into Brennan’s mind, seeming to play over and over in Brennan’s brain. Jackson’s white face stared at Brennan again and again, and the deep gashes cut themselves into Brennan’s eyes. He snapped back into reality, though, and swam after the others. Jack seemed to snap out of it to, and followed Brennan.
They put away their clothes, and almost immediately a female doctor ran out of a neighboring room, and rushed Jackson inside the room, which Brennan assumed was a doctor’s office. Brennan figured that one of the maintenance men had called ahead for a doctor, and apparently he was right because the moment they had arrived, Brennan had spotted a small group of onlookers, and knew that the news had spread. He ran inside the room, and the doctor said, “Close the door and lock it, please.” The doctor’s voice was a bit low for a girl’s and slightly rough.
Then she stared at Jackson, and Brennan winced as he heard a few bones snap into place, and flesh moving back into place. Strands of skin laced themselves around others, and soon the wound was all clean. Brennan heard the sounds of in-body fixing, but that stopped after a few seconds. Finally, all that was left was a small cut. Brennan was about to ask the doctor why she was keeping it open, when a trickle of blood came under the door. When there was a decent sized puddle, it turned into a small red cloud, and flew into Jackson’s body though the small cut. “The blood he lost,” Explained the doctor, seeing Brennan’s creeped out look.
Soon it was all gone, and the doctor closed the cut. The doctor looked hard at Jackson’s chest, and it had the same effect as CPR. Jackson’s chest started moving, slowly at first, but then growing. Soon he started to cough feebly, and then he coughed out water. He looked around, his eyes looking bleary, and spotted Brennan, Jack, the maintenance group, and the doctor. “What happened?” He asked. Brennan and the rest of group laughed with relief, and patted Jackson on the back, their spirits lifted. Brennan felt a weight fall off his shoulders, and smiled.
Jackson’s eyes widened then, and he cried, “I remember everything now!” The rest of the group leaned forward in the chairs they had been sitting on, and looked at Jackson eagerly. “Can we get the rebel leader here so I don’t have to repeat this a million times?” Jackson asked.
“Yeah, sure,” Replied Jack. Brennan was just about to agree with Jack, when suddenly he realized that he hadn’t thought that there would be a rebel leader. It seemed logical that there would be, but Brennan hadn’t thought of the possibility.
“Who’s the rebel leader?” He asked.
Jack gaped at Brennan, and then smiled and said, “You’ll find out. I think you might know this person. Brennan nodded, happy to keep it a mystery for a few minutes, and one man in the maintenance crew walked down the hall. A few minutes later, Brennan heard the sound of footsteps coming down the hall, and the doorknob turned.
The door opened, and in walked the maintenance man, and the person Brennan least expected walked in with him. As Kaci walked past him, Brennan shot her a confused look. She just smiled and smirked, probably loving the attention. Brennan thought about it for a few seconds, and the more he thought about it, the more it made sense.
Kaci looked a Jackson, and said, “Well, come on, I’ve got things to do.”
Jackson swallowed hard, and began, “I was just swimming around, doing my normal daily routine, swimming in the coral, sitting on the rocks, and taking a look at the oyster shells to see if any of them had pearls, when I heard this sort of swishing noise. I looked around, and didn’t see anything, until I looked all the way behind me. There was this sort of man shaped shadow, and I don’t mean the black mist like Jace makes, but I mean a real shadow, that was formed like a man. Sure I’ve heard the rumors about them, but I didn’t believe them until now.”
“What rumors?” Asked Kaci a little sharply.
“The rumor that the military has found a way to control the Shadow Wraiths,” Replied Jackson.
“That’s impossible. The Shadow Wraiths have never agreed to any sort of contracts, unless it includes the contract-maker giving them a helpless life.” Kaci fumed.
“Well this thing sure did look like a Shadow Wraith. When he moved, his cloak moved, and the Shadow Wraith produced the swishing noise that the Shadow Wraiths make when they’re angry,” He informed the group.
“I think this might sound stupid, but what is a Shadow Wraith?” Asked Brennan, hoping he hadn’t just made himself sound like an idiot.
“Yes that is a stupid question, but a Shadow Wraith is the spiritual embodiment of the bad force that was mixed in the Black Plague. They are immortal, and they appeared on Earth right after the Black Plague ended. They are made of Shadows, hence the name, and they are extremely dangerous. They feel an unstoppable hate for the Gifted, and they would do anything to wipe us out. They can kill us very easily, and the only way we can kill them is if we are Wraith Hunters. Wraith Hunters are a special kind of Gifted that are as rare as one in a hundred and they are endowed with the normal powers, as well as this sort of power they channel that can kill Shadow Wraiths. The power comes from the Light Wraiths, which are the spiritual embodiment of the good force. The Light Wraiths also show themselves, and they are what people call angles.” Kaci said, sounding sort of exasperated.
“Oh,” Was all Brennan could say, his brain still processing this new information.
“So anyway,” Interrupted Jackson, impatient to get on with his story, “I was just backing up, when I hit the pipe, and realized I had nowhere to go. At that moment, a shark passed the Shadow Wraith, and died on contact, obviously, and the Shadow Wraith extracted it’s teeth, and shot them at me. I dodged, but they still slashed my arm. It must’ve thought I was dead, because it floated away, to the top,” He finished, looking pleased with himself.
“Is the Wraith still out there?” Asked Kaci, looking alarmed.
“No, miss,” Jackson said respectfully.
Obviously pleased, Kaci smiled, and looked at Brennan.
“By the way, sometimes the Light Wraiths can take the form of humans, but they glow slightly. The Shadow Wraiths can’t do that, but they can turn into shadows of humans.” Said Kaci non-chalantly.
“Ok…” Brennan replied, his response sounding slightly like a question because he was confused at why she had randomly mentioned this.
“So what are you gonna do about the Shadow Wraith problem, miss?” Asked Jackson.
“Well, I was originally planning to keep it quiet, but hen I realized I hate it when people keep things from me, so I decided to make an announcement over the loudspeaker. And, we will have to have a meeting with all the officials here. That includes you to Brennan, because you are very highly respected in the court, and you Jackson, because you are the witness,” Replied Kaci, her voice very firm. Brennan was surprised that he was respected in the court, and was also wondering why he had gained such a large amount of popularity.
“Thanks,” He said. Kaci nodded at him superiorly, and swept out of the room. Brennan returned to his room, thinking over the day’s events, and trying to get the fact that Kaci was the rebel leader out of his mind. After a few hours of waiting, and after dinner, Kaci finally went onto the loudspeaker.
“Hello, all rebels! This is Kaci speaking here, with an important announcement. We have almost had someone killed in the waters outside the building, by a Shadow Wraith. Somehow, the military has found a way to make a contract with the Shadow Wraiths. Let it be known that a weekly payment of a helpless life is not beneath the military. There might still be Shadow Wraith water invasions, and maybe even some attempts at entering. Let it also be known that the Shadow Wraiths will not breach our defenses. I just want everyone to be aware of this. Good night, fellow rebels.” Brennan was surprised by the formality and the strength in Kaci’s voice. She sounded like a true leader, strong and firm.
As Brennan hurried to the conference room where the meeting was to be hosted, he heard lots of voices talking and complaining about the news. Most of them were very frightened, but were trying to hide it. He finally found the right conference room, and took a deep breath. “I have to make a good and strong impression on the court.”
He opened the door, strode into the room which held a large table, and all the people sitting around it. Without saying a word, he took big steps to the table, took an empty seat, and looked straight ahead. “Hello, Brennan! Thank you for coming. I understand that this is the first meeting you have had with everyone here, but since this is not exactly a social event, there is no time for introductions,” Kaci said from her position at the head of the table.
Brennan nodded and said, “I’m sorry I’m late, but I got lost.” There were a few laughs at this, but Kaci silenced them with several well aimed death glares. The meeting then continued, and everyone’s focus slipped away from Brennan, and to Kaci. Only then did Brennan dare to let his ‘good impression’ slip. He gazed around the room in awe, at the old fashioned style, and the crystal chandelier, at the two rows of laptops lining the room, ready for use, and at the beautiful painting at the back of the room.
He turned his attention to the meeting after a few minutes of gazing, and found himself incredibly bored, as Kaci had stopped talking to let the court talk. They were arguing about the cost and consequences of certain action. Then he caught Kaci’s eye, and she looked ready to fall asleep, her expression just as bored as Brennan. Kaci pointed at the court, wrote ‘lol’ in the air, and rolled her eyes. They were in silent hysterics and having a silent conversation, until one of the court members said, “Let’s ask Kaci her opinion.”
Kaci straightened up like a bullet, just in time to look like she had been listening, interested, the whole conversation. “We were just arguing about the consequences of trying to summon a Light Wraith to attack the Shadow Wraiths,” Said one.
“Well, I don’t see the harm, because the Light Wraith would most probably kill the Shadow Wraith, and the Light Wraith’s don’t demand anything from the summoner,” Said Kaci.
“Yes, that’s what I was thinking, but Jenna thought that it would be a bad idea because summoning a Light Wraith sends out a sort of message to the Shadow Wraiths, and attracts the Shadow Wraiths like ants to a picnic.” Said another one.
Jenna stepped forward and said, “Well it is true, you have to give me that, at least.”
Kaci sighed, and decided, “Let’s not summon a Light Wraith. The Shadow Wraith is gone, anyway, and I don’t want to attract Shadow Wraiths. But, I don’t think it would be a bad idea to make a contract with the Light Wraiths. We need allies in the coming war, after all.”
Brennan was feeling confused at first, but then got the flow of things, and agreed with Kaci. But what coming war? “Excuse me, but I agree with Kaci. I am also wondering what coming war you are talking about,” Informed Brennan. All eyes turned to him, and Kaci looked gratefully at him. He nodded, and looked at the court.
“The war with the Military and the Shadow Wraiths against the Rebels, and hopefully the Light Wraiths.” Jenna answered. Her words sent a shiver down Brennan’s back.
“Who will make the summoning,” Asked one of the men.
“Brennan, of course,” Said Kaci. Brennan wondered if he had heard correctly.
“What? Why? Me?” He spluttered.
“Yes you, of course,” Kaci replied, looking amused.
“But why?” He asked.
“Because you are the Wraith Hunter. The writings say that you are the Wraith Hunter. Not a Wraith Hunter, but the Wraith Hunter,” Kaci said.
Brennan’s mind went into turmoil at that moment. He was a Wraith Hunter? No, the Wraith Hunter. What was the difference? Thoughts and questions whirled through his mind like a whirlwind. Finally, though, he regained control. “I’m a Wraith Hunter? How do you know?” He asked.
“We know because we have noticed your immense power. Like in the training room. Wraith Hunters have that a lot,” She said.
“And what do you mean, the Wraith Hunter?” Brennan inquired.
“The one Wraith Hunter that would find a way to summon all the Wraith Hunters in the world to kill the Shadow Wraiths,” Kaci replied.
“And is this some sort of myth?” Brennan asked sarcastically.
“Actually, yes. It was in a sort of prophecy this guy made a few thousand years back,” Said Kaci casually.
“Ohhh,” Brennan’s voice trailed off in the middle of his sentence.
“So you are destined, if you are the mystical person, to destroy every single Shadow Wraith. And, you are also destined to make an army of Wraith Hunters. The man who made the prophecy said that you will have a test, and the test is that you have to be able to summon a Light Wraith, and make it bow to you,” Kaci said.




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Hey, I guess I'll be reviewing ^^

So, the first thing I want to say, is that this might have been better if it had been divided into sections. It took a very long time to read, but if you had put out different parts at different times, it would have been easier.

One problem I saw mainly had to do with editing. There were some typos and errors that could have been fixed with closer editing, but that isn't a very big problem.

The whole thing about the powers and the government tracking them to control them reminds me of a movie I saw a trailer for, but I can't remember what it was called. I was also reminded a lot of Harry Potter at the part where there was almost a lock down because of the Shadow Wraith. (It reminded me of the Dementors [Spelling?])

I really liked the part where Jack and Brennan were laughing, and then they saw blood. It made a surprise twist from a happy mood to a creepy and scary mood, and I love it when stories do that, so wonderful job! ^^

Overall, it was long, but also very good. The ending seems very cliff-hanger-ish, so maybe there will be (or is, I didn't bother to check) more. If there will be/is, I'll be looking forward to reading it.

Hope this was helpful, and if you have any questions about anything I've said, feel free to PM me.
~~DisturbedDisorder~~

I am a little more provocative then you might be..
It's your shock and then your horror on which I feed..
So can you tell me what exactly does freedom mean..?
If I'm not free to be as twisted as I wanna be..!?

-Divide, Disturbed




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Hey! I was going to review, but I didn't get all the way through. Not because it isn't good--it is--but because it would be really hard to review so much. I'd suggest making it smaller. If you do, mind PMing me? I'd love to review, but it takes a while and this is really long. Thanks.

loveness, ultraviolet
"Blah blah blah. You feel trapped in your life. Here is what I am hearing: happiness isn't worth any inconvenience."

~asofterworld.com




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Hey Max, I've added this to my reading list and will be reviewing in the next week.




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All I can say is....i want more! The story had a great plot and It kept me reading. There were a few editing mistakes and just somethings I remember is that you repeated the word tears in a couple of sentences throughout the story. Also, I think some pieces were just fluff. If you're going to have them in there, maybe detail them a little bit more. Other than that, I loved the whole idea.

-gabby
There is no secret left unspoken.



It's been many years since I had such an exemplary vegetable.
— Mr Collins, Pride and Prejudice