Wolf Heart -Chapter (?)

Wolf · 2007-10-25T20:57:16Z

..The cracks and groans of breaking sea ice echoed eerily in the night. Ayra shifted restlessly, her eyeslashes fluttering feverishly as she dreamed. The crude cotton blanket was rough against her cheek. In the cot beside her, Guinevere, her best friend, muttered something indiscernible before rolling over again. Ayra woke with a start, her heart racing. Eyes wild, she scanned their small room for signs of danger. But there was only the chair, closet and her backpack...but in the deep blue shadows, anything could be hiding. Silent footsteps, muffled by the thick, gleaming floorboards, broke the silence like ripples disturbing the calm waters of a pond. Ayra leapt gracefully up the stairs; three at a time, until she reached the top. The deck of the ship was moon washed and brilliant, all gently ruffled sails and quietly groaning timbers. She padded soundless to the rail and looked down on the dark waters, letting her mind wander.... (to be continued. Do you like it? Can I improve on some things? Tell me what you think.)

Fan

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Fri Oct 26, 2007 9:17 pm

Fan says... · Fri Oct 26, 2007 9:17 pm

You do realise you can edit these posts? (the button on teh top right of the message box. You should add what you've posted to your main story (the first post) and similar to what I said before, this is not a blog!

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Wolf

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Fri Oct 26, 2007 9:19 pm

Wolf says... · Fri Oct 26, 2007 9:19 pm

Ok, ok! :}
Sorry if I sound defensive, but I'm actually only 12 and also, I joined this site yesterday.
But thanks for the advice! ^^

[edit 1]

Sorry if this is blogging, but I'm going to put together all of what I've written and move it to the Fantasy/Fiction forums.

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mizz-iceberg

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Mon Oct 29, 2007 11:12 pm

mizz-iceberg says... · Mon Oct 29, 2007 11:12 pm

It says so many reviews because it's also counting the replies you posted yourself.
hehe.

It's too short right now, but I like it! great descriptions!

I see you are a new member.
PM me if you have any questions about anything at all.

-Icy

I'm a godmother, that's a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I taught her that.
--Ellen DeGeneres

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Meep

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Tue Oct 30, 2007 1:33 am

Meep says... · Tue Oct 30, 2007 1:33 am

Please, please, please do not post immediately after yourself. This isn't a chat room, and unlike some of those ginormous websites (like, I'unno, Gaia Online), you don't need to bump your thread to keep it on the first page (it's frowned upon, if I remember correctly).

✖ I'm sick, you're tired. Let's dance.

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