To Slay a Dragon

by wafflewolf7

Published October 25, 2018

E - Everyone

In Short Stories

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The ground shuddered beneath the stallion’s onyx hooves, the sun glinting off its dark coat. The fearsome beast’s hoofbeats pounding the earth mimicked its rider, Tristen’s, heartbeat. He wiped his brow, his gleaming armor stifling in the setting sun. He smirked as he relished the life he’d soon have, finally living in the luxury he knew he deserved. His sword hung heavy at his side, and he was itching with the anticipation of wielding it. He squinted, the blazing sun an inferno in his tawny eyes. He flicked the reins, edging the horse from a steady canter into a gallop. The lush grass slowly faded into desert under his steed’s mighty hooves, giving way to a wasteland as he approached his destination.

The wind rushed through Tristen’s blonde hair as he whizzed by charred trees indicating the creature’s presence. A burst of heat seared his skin as his horse carried him past one newly ablaze. The stone fortress of the dragon’s keep rose in the distance, its inky stone seeming to drink up the sunset. He squinted, longing to see the captured princess calling out to him. The stallion skidded to a halt and whinnied as its hooves arrived at a steep cliff above a ravine. Tristen dismounted, tied the reins around the branch of an intact tree, and brandished his sword, a shrill noise echoing as he pulled it from its scabbard. He placed his platinum helmet on his head and wandered once again to the edge of the precipice, peering into the steam rising from below. He glanced up at the tower, searching for any sign of distress. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed a rusted bridge still glinting in the setting sun. Indomitably, he placed his foot on the bridge, causing it to groan under weight it likely had not endured in ages. He grabbed the rusted rail and shook it, testing the bridge’s strength. The railing snapped off and sailed into the steaming abyss below, almost taking Tristen with it. He jumped back and watched it fall, descending much farther than he thought. His stomach churned as it descended. When it found the bottom, a monstrous roar erupted from the pit.

In a burst of steam and heat, a magnificent dragon arose from the depths, baring its teeth at Tristen. The setting sun glinted off its silver scales. Smirking, he took a swing at the beast, conducting his sword with the skill of only one who had endured years of training under the summer sun. His sword did not meet scales, however. The dragon flew in an arc above him and dove below, returning to the abyss.

That was easy, Tristen thought. He continued across the bridge, warily this time. He snapped to attention as a small thump shook the bridge, his hand on his sword. Suddenly the whole bridge rattled, knocking him to the ground and tossing his sword a few feet away. The bridge was torn in half by the dragon that flew up from underneath it, and Tristen’s world began to tilt as the bridge began to fall into the abyss below. The bolts holding the bridge to the tower island behind him began to spring from the ground. The dragon hovered beneath Tristen as he dangled precariously from the rusting bridge, opening its mouth, waiting for him to fall. Grabbing the final bolt, he hurled himself to land and turned to face the dragon. Its sharp teeth, splattered with its last victims, waited below him, its snakelike tongue blazing with orange flame. Growing impatient waiting for Tristen to fall, it began to rise in pursuit.

This is my opportunity, he thought. Squinting his eye, Tristen thrust the longsword into its open maw, watching as it sailed into the darkness of its throat. The dragon wailed in agony, steam erupting from its nostrils as it choked on the sharp blade. Its eyes almost appeared sorrowful as it landed on the ground beside him. He was going to miss his longsword, but at least he’d have a doting princess. If only he could find her. He marched toward the ominous tower, spirit proud despite his moaning legs. His armor clamored as he searched for a point of entry, his aching legs threatening to collapse under its weight. He approached an archway leading to a staircase at the foot of the windowless tower.

“Who are you?”

He glanced up at the landing, eyes finally capturing the beautiful princess he’d been searching for as she glided to the base of the stairs. He removed his stifling helmet and ran his hand through his golden hair.

“You’re welcome princess! I’ve slayed the hideous beast and rescued you! Return with me at once and you shall be my bride!” He leaned in for a kiss.

The princess swayed to the side with finality, causing him to stumble.

“What have you done?”

She walked to the dragon’s corpse with wide eyes and began to survey it, her hazel locks obscuring her delicate face. Before Tristen could tell her to step away from the creature, she knelt by the vicious head and cradled it in her lap.

“Princess?”

She paid him no heed. Tears began to roll down her cheeks, barely illuminated in the light of the hardly visible sky. They splattered on the dragons shimmering scales, rolling down its face like it was mourning as well.

“Princess, step away from that terrible monster.”

She glared up at him, her piercing green eyes sharper than the dragon’s teeth.

“You are the only monster here,” she said with cold indignation.

Rising to her feet, she stalked toward Tristen, her swishing icy blue dress creating an ethereal air around her.

“I don’t understand!” Tristen said, scratching his blonde hair in confusion, “She imprisoned you!”

“She saved me! She protected me from a world who only wanted to harm me. And here she lies, what a token she’s been given for her courageous acts! Slain by a petty knight, and only in pursuit of property!” She spat, her emerald eyes gleaming with rage.

He was taken aback, but began walking toward her to comfort her, feeling useless standing idly.

“Princess, I-”

“I have a name,” she cut him off. “I am Zephys, and I am not your princess.”

A gust of wind accompanied by a twitch of her hand sent Tristen flying backwards, hitting the rocky ground near the steaming canyon with force.

“I loved her.” Zephys said, tears staining her beautiful face as she reached down to the dragon’s corpse. “We were happy, almost like mother and daughter, living here, protected from the cruel world.” She tore a tooth from the dragon’s mouth, cradling it in one hand.

She strode toward Tristen, rage alight in her gleaming eyes, tears reflected in them.

“Until you came along.”

She plunged the tooth into his abdomen, slowly twisting it and watching the pain on his face with grim elation. She let him fall to the ground near the remnants of the bridge when the battle had taken place. She turned and walked away, leaving him to either die or to crawl away and live.

“What are you?”

She turned sharply on him, her dark face wet with tears and twisted with emotion. She grimaced and strode back to where he lay, placing her boot on top on his chest.

“The last thing you’ll ever see.”

And she shoved him into the ravine.

Comments & reviews · 7
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ofmenandmice Review
ofmenandmice wrote a review Review · Dec 17, 2018

I love the plot twist. Your writing is pleasant to read, and your grammar is excellent.
I do think that the fight scene should've been longer. A hitch would've been nice.
For example, his sword catches on something on the way down, then at the last minute,
falling down the dragon's throat. Also, there isn't much of a description for the dragon.

GREAT WORK.

Ohhhhhhh hitches are fun!! I might take you up on that!! :) Thanks so much for all the nice praise! :)

Your welcome.
Keep up the great work.

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Horisun
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Horisun commented Comment · Dec 5, 2018

Awsome! Loved how you didn't make the Dragon a vicious monster and the princess a damsel in distress.

YES that's what I wanted- the other way is boring! :)

User avatar
Gnomish
Review
Gnomish wrote a review Review · Nov 18, 2018

Wow!
I loved the twist at the end, I was almost worried reading it that it would just be a classic "knight kills dragon and marries the princess" story, and I loved how you changed it around at the very end, while still making it flow easily!

I do think that you should have prolonged the fight with the dragon a bit more, and perhaps added more details. For example you said that Tristan jumped off the breaking bridge onto the ground, and I assumed it was the side across from the keep. But then, Zephrys appeared, presumably from the keep, which meant that she must've flown across the ravine.

Just thought you might want to make that part a bit clearer!

Great job!
-Gnomish

Thanks! I'm currently working to fix the fight so that it will be more clear and I'm also having some friends tell me what confuses them so I can make it clearer. Thanks so much for reading my work and helping me make it better!

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sophies36
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sophies36 commented Comment · Nov 2, 2018

A couple things!
1- It's really well written! There isn't a lot on the dragon though! it was super fast and I wanted more!
2-it flows so amazingly! everything connects so easily!
good job I love it!

Thank you so much for your commentary and for brightening my day with your lovely avatar! I'm working on the dragon scene currently and will update it here when I'm finished. Thanks soo much and I'm glad you liked it! :)

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Cyvain87
Review
Cyvain87 wrote a review Review · Oct 29, 2018

Wow what a very different and interesting twist this story has! I also love how you describe the battle between the dragon and the Knight, it flows so beautifully. The demeanour (i think that's the word I'm looking for) of each character you depict amazingly too. I love this story very much, well done.

Thank you so much! When I was little, dragons were my favorite thing in the whole world and I was always upset that they were always villains in their stories- I guess that's where I was coming from :)

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Wriskypump
Review
Wriskypump wrote a review Review · Oct 25, 2018

Hey! Since u tagged me I see that u have published and I happen to have a space of free time at the moment.

"The powerful beast’s hoofbeats pounding the earth...etc" = Powerful and pounding tells us the same thing so it is a bit redundant. U told us the ground shuddered in the previous sentence too, so we KNOW for sure this beast is powerful. Pounding can stay, and it's good, because we can really relate that well to a Heartbeat. :)

He smirked as he relished the life he’d have soon, finally living in the luxury he knew he deserved. His sword hung heavy at his side, and he was itching with the anticipation of wielding it. = Here's just some really good emotion and character development that is gorgeous. I definitely want to point out how engaging that is to a reader. I'm hooked.

(I would start anew paragraph here, since the subject matter changed off of Tristen's thoughts to the sudden realization that we are in pursuit of some creature)
*The wind rushed through Tristen’s hair as he whizzed by charred trees indicating the creature’s presence.

"Unfearingly, he placed his foot on the bridge, causing it to groan under weight it likely had not endured in ages." #
@(1)(Several things with this. He goes from looking for a way to cross the ravine to enter the fortress, to actually venturing to that way after spotting it. Likely a good time to start a fresh paragraph). ---> Then we have this word unfearingly, which I believe is not a word. There are words like Confidently, Assuredly, Not daunted, Indomitably, or ideas like Without Hesitating. -(2)-

The dragon flew*# (you could say hovered) beneath Tristen as he dangled precariously from the rusting bridge, opening its mouth, waiting for him to fall. +Grabbing the final bolt, he hurled himself to land and turned to face the dragon. (this transition happened way too fast in my opinion. He climbed it as if he was the one who could fly. He's back on land and i felt like I watched it in fast forward)

By the way... what color was the dragon?


"Growing impatient waiting for Tristen to fall, it began to rise in pursuit. This is my opportunity, he thought. Squinting his eye, Tristen thrust the longsword into its open maw, watching as it sailed into the pit of its stomach. ^(NOOOOO!! Happening way to fast. Life happens with little transitions. I can't picture this in a smooth stream. A little more description please. I didn't know how close the dragon was to Tristen when he either - threw or thrust the sword, I couldn't definitively decipher^)

The dragon wailed in agony, *(part of me wanted to watch a specific reaction, like choking or rolling or thrashing the air and falling)* steam erupting from its nostrils. Its eyes almost appeared sorrowful as it landed on the ground beside him.

He’d _(was going to)_ miss his longsword, ][it just reads better that way for some reason I think] but at least he’d have a doting princess. If only he could find her.

“What have you done?”
-& She just barrels onto the scene out of TRULY nowhere. XD. Why didn't she try to interfere WHILE he was about to harm the dragon?

He pivoted, gazing upon the beautiful princess he’d been searching for."
+Now what does this girl look like? Is Tristen in a full suit of armor, or does he have any features too? it helps me from seeing them as either stereotypes or merely faceless figures+

Oh, I see that Tristen has some blonde hair. Might have been nice to know closer to the beginning. I had seen him with brown hair the entire time.

That was definitely an unexpected ending. The princess could have avoided skilled knights needlessly dying by putting up a sign nearby saying, "Living Happily with Dragon, Not in Need of Saving."

Then if Tristen had tried to battle the dragon anyway he would have deserved to die.

Thank you soooo much for helping me edit this! I definitely plan to make the dragon fight longer because it's really short right now and I will update it here when I'm finished. I also knew that I should have added some paragraphs, but I wasn't sure where, so thanks a ton for giving me some distinction. I'm currently adding detail to all the characters (including the dragon, who is silver by the way) and I didn't realize it but I totally agree with Zephys just randomly appearing- where the heck did she even come from? (I'll have to fix that...)

Yeah, a sign would have been a really good idea, but I feel like Tristen is the kind of person who would ignore it to 'get the girl' anyway. I'd put one there so that ignoring it would be characterization, but I feel like it takes away from the twist at the end of the story.

Thanks again!!! :)

Glad my review was helpful. Yeah, having a sign would be tricky to introduce into the story now that you mention it. But there should be some way he is warned unless Zephys doesn't really care if scores of Knights meet their doom

A funny thing is that I imagined the dragon as silver and black. So i guess i was close. U think it could be two-tone? XD

100% silver scales, black underbelly

Hey, I have an idea for a bit of a longer short story I think that might be right down your alley.

Here it is: On a windless halloween night after all the trick-or-treaters have deserted the streets a vampire (who may or may not prey on kids and then release them back as they were but dazed so they don't remember the encounter) is doing some ritual on the back porch involving the constellations to find some lost ancient vampire songs when she hears something in the gutter. So she leaps up on the roof and finds a yelping little jack-O'lantern hyperventilating and raving about some terrifying "Pumpkin Creaming Looneys" chasing him.

This quiet young 50-year old vampire has green eyes with black scleras, a dark brown complexion, and no hair. She is a little tall, quite muscular, and has six claws on each hand. She likes wearing old-fashioned clothing. She happens to like getting involved in others business, and owns numerous books of assorted monster specimens which animate the pictures when opened, and looks deceptively innocent. - possible name suggestion for her could be Astrea Screamer

The jack-O'lantern is receiving sinister messages from these paranormal entities. A partially-burned letter is found in the basement from them threatening the vampire if she should decide to protect the pumpkin

These beings are towering mongrel creatures that have lairs int he mountains. They attacks with rapid blows, venom and projectile weapons but they only obliterate things in the way of reaching their pumpkin: they alwasy take their pumpkins alive and screaming because they make special dishes for their Pumpkin King. They hunt in mobs of 2-4. They can be easily injured with bright light.

Oddly enough, the ancient Vampire song is called Slayer of Lords... and the reason Astrea wants to get her hands on it is because she is bound under a spell by a cruel vampire who uses her to carry out dangerous missions for him against her preference.

The pumpkin thinks he has heard something about the location of this song. So do u think you can pull off this story? :D

Astrea could also use the song to kill the Pumpkin-devouring King. When they are fleeing from the Pumpkin creamers and searching for the song they run into a tiny forest and at a large pond meet a creature called a Karnab which owns a Ysoki Refactor Suit. The suit is made mostly of emeralds & a few bloodstones. (bloodstones are greenish with a red dot or two in the center). The suit is a natural helper of noble causes and can make costumes.

Oh, and the jacko'lantern could be painted with a baby dragon for a face, no actual carving having taken place upon it.

the song is behind a waterfall in possession of a lightning druid. They won't be powerful enough to fight the druid so they prob need to trick it with a costume.

The Karnab swims cuz it lives on the rotted logs in the lake. Looks overall like an overgrown black leaf or crumpled paper, but the distinctly loose features at the top end of it resemble rams' horns and a circular horn looking snout, while the bottom half the shape and movement of an eel

I really want to write this now- i might change some details, like i think that the jack o lantern isn't really alive but 'possessed' or 'animated' by a friendly spirit who's trying to help or something- but I've literally already started writing!!

Awesome! I'm so excited about it. Yes, feel free to change any factors u wish! :D

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wafflewolf7
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wafflewolf7 commented Comment · Oct 25, 2018

Thank you so much to @Wriskypump for helping me get the points I needed to publish this!!



If you don't know where you're going, any road'll take you there.
— George Harrison