A lost stone

by victoria781

Published December 19, 2011

I wrote this 2 years ago. I do see I need to work on punctuation :/ lol

A lost stone
moreso, thrown away
given a look, a second glance perhaps
before you walk away
because what you thought to be a sparkle
is merely a speck of dust
and what you thought would skip five miles and more
did not live up to your expect
and if I could muster up a shimmer or a song
I would
for you would be amazed by me
and want me, love me, keep me long
but I am not a shimmering rock
who sings and skips or pleases you
I am just a thrown away one
you do not need
just walk on by
and I sit amongst these shining pearls
and I'm lost...
who placed me here?
where are all the other pebbles whose gray sides have no glitter?
why am I the only one? who's left alone in this sad place(state?)
why can't I please a single one? who passes through this sad sad place
while you sleep and dream of your happy days
know, perhaps, that I instead lay
and cry
and wear and tear
and break down...
I weep
for I don't know what is wrong with me.

Comments & reviews · 2
User avatar
AliyahPillage
Review
AliyahPillage wrote a review Review · Dec 19, 2011

I enjoyed reading your poem, I would consider looking at your punctuation and fixing it.

I am just a thrown away one

this line made little sense to me, I would consider taking the word one out and maybe the a or changing thrown to throw then maybe it would make more sense.
Nice job other than those little things.
Keep them coming.

User avatar
Snoweary
Review
Snoweary wrote a review Review · Dec 19, 2011

Hello there! Uhh, yeah you really should work on the punctuation :D But overall, i honestly like your poem very much. When you wrote;

I would
for you would be amazed by me
and want me, love me, keep me long
but I am not a shimmering rock
who sings and skips or pleases you
I am just a thrown away one
you do not need
just walk on by
and I sit amongst these shining pearls
and I'm lost...

Cool! i totally love this part :D
Anyway, keep writing :D
-Snoweary



They who talk all day of beauty call all the plain things dirty
— John Darnielle