z

Young Writers Society


12+ Violence Mature Content

Maisie & Mallory’s demise

by vampricone6783


*This is connected to my stories “The clown and the little girl:SHORT STORY” ,”The clown and the little girl:Part two” the last tales to my Christmas and Halloween stories and “It’s all a bit tragic isn’t it?” From my story “It’s all a bit tragic isn’t it?” We learn about Alexander.But what about his wife and daughter? Maisie is Alexander’s wife and Mallory is his daughter.I suggest reading the stories mentioned will help you out.Look at Gacha Club character designs on my wall.Enjoy!

Maisie’s story



Introduction

1974-Anne house,Maisie’s room

This story starts with seven year old Maisie Lucy Anne.

Maisie is playing with her dolls at the moment,but when she’s not playing with them,she’s chasing the strange boy in her neighborhood who always dresses in bright colors with a baseball bat.

He was older than her.He was eight,to be exact.

But he always got scared when she chased him,it was hilarious!

He would start crying and telling her to go away.She didn’t,of course.

Maisie giggled to herself.

She couldn’t wait to see him cross the street today so she could chase him!

Chapter One-Chasing the boy

1974-Oakland sidewalk,234th lane.

Maisie stood on the sidewalk,holding a baseball bat half her size,waiting for the boy.

One would think she looked quite adorable,standing outside with a bat,like she were in little league.

But she wasn’t using it for little league.She didn’t even like sports! She was only looking for a sickly colorful boy-

-A boy in bright colors was walking down the sidewalk.

Maisie grinned.Just the boy she was looking for.

A giggle bubbled from her lips as with much difficulty,she raised the lethal wooden weapon and jolted towards the unsuspecting victim.

She perceived the sound of cries and shoes slapping on cement.

With blind joy,she clutched his arm.

Afterwards,Maisie shoved him to the ground.

Cornered like an animal,she lifted the bat to the air,already knowing what to do.Why,it had been done countless other times!

“Stop! Please!”

“No!”

“It hurts!”

“No,it’s funny! You’re just weak and stupid!”

“You’re a boy! Daddy says boys are strong.You’re not strong.Why?”

Chapter Two-Back home

1974-Anne house-Dinnertime

Maisie grimaced at the sight of mushed peas before her.

There was no way she was eating that for Dinner.

“Eat.” Her Dad insisted.

“But..they’re so gross and mushy! I don’t wanttt to!” Maisie complained.

“If you don’t eat your food,you don’t get to chase the boy anymore.” He warned.

Maisie didn’t say anything.She snarfed down the green,slimy,and sludgy mush as if it were pizza.

Chapter Three-School

1974-Monday-Oakland elementary-entrance

“Goodbye,Maisie!”

“Bye.”

“Have a good day at school.”

“Okay.”

Chapter Four-Paint Spills

1974-Monday-Oakland elementary-The incident

“Alright,everybody! Put your beautiful drawings on the wall.”

Maisie gripped her handprint art she made a few days earlier.

Her teacher,Mrs.Alexis,wanted her class to make pictures with their hands and tape them to the classroom wall.

But putting up the pictures was so boring! She just wanted to be by herself-

Crying.Tears.

Who could be crying?

“Please don’t stare at him.It’s rude.”

Don’t stare at who?

She turned around and saw-

The boy she liked to hit covered in paint,being taken away by a lady.Maybe it was his Mom.

A little giggle almost escaped her lips,but she bit them just in time.

Mrs.Alexis would get mad at her if she did.

Chapter Five-Lunch

11:17 A.M-Lunchtime at Mrs.Alexis’ classroom

Hmm..that was kinda funny to see him covered in paint.

Why did he it on him,anyway?

Maisie almost laughed her food out,but she caught herself and started eating again.

She didn’t want to sit with anyone else.She liked being alone.

Chapter Six-Talent show

1980-Maisie’s room-thirteen years old

Maisie lay on her bed,holding up the talent show flyer she got at school today.

She could join,but what would she do?

The only talent she could think of having was chasing the boy with a broom.

Oh wait-didn’t she chase him with a baseball bat?

Maisie chuckled to herself.

She did,but people started to notice what was happening.They even yelled at her parents.

Maisie had to switch to a broom at twelve,so no one would think anything bad of it.It’s just a broom,after all.

She sighed.

“Guess I won’t join the talent show.No biggie.”

Chapter Seven-Flowers

1980-Maisie’s front yard-thirteen years old

There wasn’t that much people Maisie really wanted to talk to.

There was the boy,but she didn’t like him.

Why didn’t she like him? Why did she hurt him at every opportunity she got?

Maisie herself didn’t even know the answer.She just disliked his presence.

“Hey there!”

Speak of the devil,that was him!

The boy!

Talking to her!

Ever since that paint incident,he’s gotten a rash on the spots where the paint landed on him.

He didn’t look that much uglier than before.

“Hi! Who are you?” He asked,approaching her.

Maisie stiffened.Wouldn’t he hate her for what she did to him?

Eh,the baseball bat probably destroyed his memory or something.

“I’m Maisie.”

“You’re really pretty.”

“Thanks.”

“I’m Alexander.I found these flowers at my friend’s house.I have them with me.Do you want them?”

“Sure.”

“Oooh thanks! Here you go!”

“You’re welcome.”

Chapter Eight-Marriage

1980-Oakland junior high-auditorium-Wednesday-11:26 A.M.-Thirteen years old

Maisie clapped for the boy,Alexander who just did some clown performances at the auditorium.

It wasn’t that cool,but nevertheless,she would clap.

He’d probably forget all about it later.Just like he forgot that he gave her flowers a week ago.

Silly forgetful boy..

……………………………………………………

1987-Friday-twenty years old-Oakland church

She was marrying him.

Alexander.That boy,now a man.

Why?

Why would she want anything to do with that detestable clown?

She didn’t,but hey,it could be fun.Maybe she’d actually like him,who knew?

It wasn’t like she had a choice.Everyone thought she would end up with him,because if she hit him,that meant “oOh sHE liKes hIm.”

Her parents wanted them together.

The town wanted them together.

Alexander wanted them together.

So why not just do it?

……………………………………………………

"Why did you marry me? You used to scoff at me after that talent show years ago.It's like you only liked me then and didn't care afterwards.Why did you do it?"

"Because I love you."

"What made you love me?"

"You're entertaining."

That wasn’t a lie,technically.

"Oh..um..okay.Do you promise to stay by my side forever?"

"I already said that on the altar."

"But can you promise me when no one is paying attention to us?"

"Alright,fine.I promise to be by your side,forevermore.Even if the entire world wants to crash us down,I want to be by your side.Happy now?"

To her annoyance,he only laughed lightly at what she said.

"Yes."

Then,he whispered,infuriatingly soft,right in her ear:

"I promise to hold your hand through the darkness,the chaos and the madness.I promise to sacrifice my flesh and blood for your safety.No matter what."

"Don't you think that's a bit dramatic?" She asked.

"I like it." He said.

Of course he liked it! By god,he loved being so dramatic!

Was that what she would live with for the rest of her life?

Chapter Nine-The birth of Mallory

1991-Twenty-four years old-Oakland hospital-Mallory’s birth

Maisie just gave birth.

Her child.

And Alexander’s.

They had a child together.

An ugly child,that is.

She was sickly and gaunt.The doctor said it was because of Alexander.When he rubbed the paint off him many years ago,that exposed raw skin,which exposed a sickness,which..

…Which appeared in Mallory.

Yes,they just named her.

Maisie was alone with Mallory.Alexander wasn’t in the room.

The funny thing was that the name Mallory meant bad luck.

Yet he thought it sounded like her name.

It sounded nothing like it.

Maisie held Mallory up to her face.Nevertheless,she would love and care for her.Nevertheless,she would keep her chin up,Alexander oblivious and Mallory alive.

She lay in that hospital bed,looking into Mallory’s eyes,every bit of Alexander in her.

“This is the beginning,Mallory.Only the beginning of a long ride.”

Chapter Ten-Alone with Mallory

1994-Alexander and Maisie’s house-Hallway-Maisie is twenty-seven years old-Mallory is three years old

“Mommy,let me out,please! I promise I won’t-“

A series of coughing.

“Mallory,it’s too dangerous.”

“No it’s not! I’ll be fi-“

More coughing.Maybe even spitting out blood.

Maisie couldn’t let her parents see her like this.With a sickly daughter and married to a clown.(Even though they kinda wanted them to be together.)

Yes,he’s a clown now.She wasn’t even that surprised.

“Please?”

“No.”

“I wish Dad were here.”

Chapter Eleven-The fight

1995-Twenty-eight years old-Alexander and Maisie’s house-The fight

“Why are you always so protective of her?!”

“I just want her to be okay!”

“And I want her to be happy! She deserves to have joy in her life!”

“Yeah,she deserves to live!“

“You’re not helping her! You’re just keeping her away from everybody,that’s not helping.I don’t know what you think you’re doing,but you need to stop.”

“I’m done with you.”

“Great.I’m done with you too.”

She..she did grow kind of protective of Mallory.She never thought she’d love the now five year old girl.

Was it really love,though? Or obsession? What was the difference,anyway?

Maisie knew for certain that she couldn’t stand Alexander.

That’s why they were leaving each other.Forever.

Chapter Twelve-Death

1996-Mallory’s death

It was better for Maisie and Alexander to be separated.Better for her to have Mallory.

Just better.

In fact,Mallory was playing outside right now-

Wait.

What was that?

"Look! It's skeleton girl!"

A girl’s voice.

"Please..leave me alone."

Mallory.Pleading.Coughing.

"Aww..is the poor baby dying? Stevie,get a coffin!"

More mocking.

"Look at the poor baby!"

A boy’s voice.

"I'm not a baby-"

Mallory again.

She couldn’t just stand by and let her get picked on like that.She had to do something,anything.

Maybe that gun she found in this house would be of use after all.She was going to say something about it,but-

There was no time to think.She had to help her.

Maisie gritted her teeth and trudged downstairs,to the basement,where the gun was.

……………………………………………………

A few minutes later-Standing outside,holding the gun

“You..stay away from my daughter!”

The bang of her gun.

She did it.She killed her bullies.Now how was she going to convince Mallory that this was a good thing?

“Skeleton girl..she’s dead.”

What?

Maisie brought herself out of her daydreaming.

Lying on the ground wasn’t the kids,but..

Mallory.

The children gaped at her in horror.

“Let’s go,Stevie.”

“Yeah..”

They ran off,frightened.

Maisie was alone,like when she was seven.

Only.

She felt more lonely than alone.

……………………………………………………

1996-Three weeks after the death of Mallory-Maisie visits Alexander’s house

"It's been awhile since I was here." Maisie remarked,standing in Alexander’s house.

The kids never told anyone what happened.Probably too scared.

Maisie considered turning herself in,but then,could she really spend the rest of her life with hardened prisoners?

What much else was there for her to live for,anyway?

She’d do it.She would turn herself in and a spend life in jail if that was her destiny.

But first,she wanted to go to her and Alexander’s old house.One last time before everything changed forever.

"I..I never wanted to hurt her..I didn't even know it was her..I thought it was...a bully.Hey,I must have been imagining!"

She chuckled lightly,but inside,she was breaking.

Why did she hurt her?

Why did she bring that gun out?

What was wrong with her?

"It's kinda nice being here again." Maisie said.

Yeah,it was.The house was getting creaky and old,but it still held memories.

“Damn you!" A voice yelled.

That voice,was it..Alexander?

"Who is there?" She asked worriedly.

No,it couldn’t be him.Wasn’t she alone?

She heard thumping from upstairs,someone running,and then-

There he was.Right in front of her.The clown makeup may have been a little (Okay,not a little.It was entirely) destroyed,blood (What..where did the blood come from?) clogging his face,but it was him.

It was Alexander.

“What..what are you doing?" Maisie asked.

What happened to him?

Was this some kind of punishment?

His hands snaked its way towards her neck,something murderous in his eyes.

Was it murderous?

"You...what are you doing?"

He didn’t say anything.

Her throat was getting tighter,the room was a blur and all she could see was him..but he resembled a gruesome demon..

"This is for taking her life when she had so much to live for.This is for making this me terrible,ghastly beast.This is for everything,my love."

Dying.She was dying.

He was choking her.

No..she could still say one last thing..tell Alexander that she would always love him..

But that would be a lie.

Even if she could talk,she wouldn’t dare.

She’d only love Mallory.

Only her..

Mallory’s story

Chapter One-Going to the circus

Three year old Mallory was in the backseat of the car, while her mother was driving them to her Dad’s circus.

It was going to be amazing!

Chapter Two-Seeing Dad perform!

Mallory had finally arrived at her Dad’s circus and she couldn’t wait!

She quickly jumped out of the car and ran inside his tent,to see him perform! She didn’t even care that she was bumping into people and she could get hurt,all she cared about was seeing her father!

It was going to be such a wonderful day!

Chapter Three-Together

After seeing him perform,he hugged Mallory and then,they’d all go home together!

Boy,today sure was wonderful!

Chapter Four-Sickness

But when Mallory was in the car,she started coughing up blood.

This was from a sickness she was born with.Mostly she slept at home or coughed up blood,like now.

It would pass,hopefully.She really didn’t want her parents to help her..

Chapter Five-It’s still going on

But even in the car ride,it was still going on.She could feel the car picking up speed to take her home,to rest in her bed.

She didn’t want to sleep! She wanted to play! She didn’t want any of this!

Chapter Six-Back home

Mallory could see their house outside her window and knew what that meant.

Making her sleep in bed.

Really,it was nothing.

Chapter Seven-Lying down

And now,she was lying down,in her bed,in her room.

Why,though? Why couldn’t she just go out?

Chapter Eight-Hearing yelling

As Mallory laid down in her bed,she heard her parents arguing about herself.

Why were they so worried about her? She was fine!

She really wished they weren’t sad.

Chapter Nine-Lonely

It’s kinda lonely up in her room.

All she could see were her dark bedroom walls and all she could hear were her the voices of her parents.

No one knew why she was sick.She just wants.

And every time her Mom was with her,she would hold her forcefully close,as if trying to protect her.

But she just wanted to play!

Her Dad always tried to make her smile.Make her laugh.

Being alone like now didn’t make her feel better.She didn’t want to go to sleep.

Chapter Ten-Sleep

But sleep overcame her.It eventually crept up to her and took over.

It always did.

Chapter Eleven-Open eyes

Mallory opened her eyes to her dark room.Her parents were downstairs,probably watching TV.

She crawled out of bed.Next,she opened the door and walked downstairs,to where her parents were watching some news show.

Mallory sat down next to them,looking at the T.V. but not paying attention to the words.She just wanted to be with her family,that’s all.

Her Dad hugged her.

That was nice of him.

Chapter Twelve-Parents

One year later

It’s been a year since those simple days of Mallory going to the circus.She was four years old now.

Every day was the same.Her parents yelling at each other,trying to help her.Her Mom locking Mallory in her room, to “help.”

Her Dad sneaking her out to see his circus.

When did it turn out like this? Why did it turn out like this?

Was it her fault, because she was sick? Because she needed to go to sleep? Because she coughed blood? Was she the reason they were fighting?

That day last year,that simple day,was one of the calmest days of her life.

Chapter Thirteen-Playing with toys

Mallory took to playing with her toys,not caring about the TV anymore.

Underneath her Dad’s makeup, there were these pink blotches of skin on him.He said they were a rash,but he never told her how they came.

She would like to know,because what if they hurt him? What if he were in pain?

Why was she thinking about that? She should just play with her toys! Of course he was okay,he wouldn’t lie to her.

Chapter Fourteen-What happened?

A year later

Mallory pulled on her doll’s blond hair angrily as she glared at her bedroom door.

Why did Mommy take her away from Daddy? Why did she lock her up here,in her bedroom?

What happened?

Chapter Fifteen-The funhouse doll

She wasn’t allowed to see Daddy anymore.That’s what Mommy said, anyway.

But he did sneak into her window and take her to his circus.

One time,he made a clown doll with black hair in pigtails in a red dress.The doll was just for her!

It was back at the circus,though.She could only see it if she went there.

“I miss you,Daddy.” She said to herself as she lay in bed,staring at the ceiling.

Chapter Sixteen-Playing outside

Mallory was outside,playing with the dandelions growing on the front yard,when,all of a sudden,she heard two kids call out:

“Look! It’s skeleton girl!”

She almost tripped on herself when she tried to stand up.When she did,she saw..

Two kids.Angelica and Stevie.Her bullies.From school.

“Please..leave me alone.” She pleaded.She started coughing without control.

“Aww..is the poor baby dying? Stevie,get a coffin!” Angelica giggled.

“Look at the poor baby!” Stevie hollered.

“I’m not a baby-“

Something shot through Mallory and she hit the grass,not saying a word.

Chapter Seventeen-Alone

Ever since that day happened,Mallory was all alone,haunting her Dad’s circus.

Right now,she was speaking to a little girl named Heather.

She..she thought she saw someone..

“Daddy?”

A/N:What are your thoughts on these characters? Who do you feel the most sympathy for? Who do you loathe the most? Is Mallory like any of her parents? If so which one? “It’s all a bit tragic isn’t it?” is about her father.

Characters in Gacha Club:

Angel Mallory:

Demon Maisie:


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232 Reviews


Points: 1778
Reviews: 232

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Sun Sep 04, 2022 10:51 pm
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LadyBug wrote a review...



Hello Vampire! Jade here to review your story! I've been over a lot of your stories in more detail, so this review will be short and more generalized.

I saw the review below said a few transitions were a bit jerky, and I agree. Some scenes feel like jump cuts, which doesn't feel like it fits the vibe of the story. Another thing I have previously mentioned is the dialogue feels a little forced at times. It feels like insults come out of nowhere and at times makes no sense. For example:

"Aww..is the poor baby dying? Stevie,get a coffin!" This could have been executed in a different way, that feels more personal to the character's background and personal life. "Awwww, sick again widdle baby." or "Awwwww is little baby sick again." you have room to explore these characters as much as you like!

Another nitpick is grammatical. After a sentence, you should leave a space. For example, there should be a space after a comma, period, or any other punctuation. It's not required, but would add a nice polish to your story!

I did like the plot of the story and development of it, though. It felt well thought out and executed, which made the plot development flow. I enjoyed that! I enjoyed reading this and I hope you have a good day or night!

Jade




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Tue Jul 26, 2022 3:07 pm
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MailicedeNamedy wrote a review...



Hi vampricone6783,

Mailice back again with a short review! :D

That's great that you've included some questions that I'll try to answer.

What are your thoughts on these characters?
It's an interesting insight to learn more about Maisie, now that I've met Alexander in your other story. I find Maisie interesting. Something about her I find makes her very exciting to identify for her actions because it's not directly described in the story. Is it a drive of hers to be aggressive or does it go back to her own parents and upbringing. Nevertheless, I find Maisie very interesting because of that and jump straight to the next question:

Who do you feel the most sympathy for?
Maisie is, in my opinion, the person for whom I feel particularly sympathetic. With the other things I mention later, I don't think Maisie has it easy and I also think that what I mentioned earlier has more to do with her parents. I don't think you have to feel sorry for Maisie right away, but at least take her into special "protection", or maybe treat her like a raw egg until you find out why she is like that.

Who do you loathe the most? Is Mallory like any of her parents?
Difficult question. I wasn't sure at the beginning whether I shouldn't put Maisie here, because of her character, but I think Mallory is better here, because Mallory is just strange. At least that's the impression I get. In a way, Mallory is a cross between Alexander and Maisie. It seems as if she got the inner feelings and emotions from her mother and the outward appearances mostly from her father.

Other points I noticed while reading:

He was older than her.He was eight,to be exact.


I loved reading this paragraph. Somehow there was something about it where I don't know directly why I like it so much, maybe because the age was given here as something "forbidden" or "alienating".

But she wasn’t using it for little league.She didn’t even like sports!
A boy in bright colors was walking down the sidewalk.
Maisie grinned.Just the boy she was looking for.

I find the transition here a bit too jerky, the way you went from "She didn't even like sports!" to the next sentence. Here I think it helps a little bit to rewrite it so that the transition goes in a better direction. It seems like there's something missing in between.

The only talent she could think of having was chasing the boy with a broom.
Oh wait-didn’t she chase him with a baseball bat?

Here's one of those scenes where I'm not sure how to rate Maisie and yet there's something playful and diabolical about it, where I partly thought the story was written from the perspective of a sinister demon because it seems so playful, like remembering it was a baseball bat.
Have fun writing!

Mailice






Thank you so much for reading!

I edited that sentence.

Yes,Mallory is strange isn%u2019t she?





The entire family will need a therapist after this.





At the last part where Mallory is speaking to Heather,Heather and her older sister May were out for a day.This was before Heather and Loraine became friends.Mallory and Heather were having a lil%u2019 conversation with each other.Heather knew she was a ghost and wasn%u2019t afraid of her.




My tongue must tell the anger of my heart, or else my heart, concealing it, will break...
— Katherine, The Taming of the Shrew