Ellette meets Vaughn

Hey friend! Ellie here with a quick review for this short story! It has been a while since I reviewed one of your short stories, but it is always a pleasure. Let's get right into it!

Of course, that wasn’t possible. Monsters and creatures of the night didn’t exist. Trees were wood, dirt was dirt, and worms were worms. Ellette had to live with being in a world as interesting as her Math textbook.

And look! A gaping cave, where many animals could have resided! What harm could it do for Ellette to look inside? It’d only be for a second!

So into the cave she went.

Who spent all that time building him? He was absolutely gorgeous. He had black hair that reached his shoulders, pale, ghostly skin, wore a long-sleeved black shirt, ripped jeans, and brown boots. He had black eye makeup around his eyes. His nails weren’t nails, but claws. His ears were pointed, like an elves’.

Whoever made him must have taken a liking to alt boys and fantasy. But why didn’t they make him…normal sized? Wouldn’t that take less work? And why here, in a cave? Ellette thought to herself.

“Vaughn. You’ll come back, right? You’ll come back so I can eat you?”

“Eat me? What do you mean?” Ellette asked, goosebumps skittering around her body.

“I just met you, so I won’t do it now. But next time, I’ll eat you. I’ll eat you, and then, we can be together forever. Nothing will keep us apart. I’ll have so much time to learn about you then. I promise, Ellette. I will eat you when I see you again.” Vaughn gushed.

Hi!!!
really enjoyed your story, I quite enjoyed the O'henry twist at the end, it certainly wasn't what I expected, it really threw me off!

The idea that Vaughn wanted to eat Ellette so that they could be together forever is really intriguing, very original and thoroughly refreshing.

--KB

Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),

Hi! I'm here to leave a quick review!!

First Impression: This was quite a fun tale. I think you've combined that classic formula you use so much very nicely to get us a bit of a twist of an ending here and its quite fun.

Anyway let's get right to it,

Another bright summer day, where the flowers bloomed and the sun shone benignly on the world. The Thompson family was having a picnic in the park, Beckham and his parents eating their sandwiches happily.

Ellette Thompson, however, didn’t feel much like having another bite of a sandwich. Every summer was the same. Just her and her family. She had friends, but they never invited her. There wasn’t much else for her to do. Somehow, she felt as if she was failing to have the “correct” summer vacation.

So, because she was older, Ellette could go take a walk in the park, to help clear her thoughts and get “fresh air”.

Ellette wasn’t supposed to go to the woods part. That part of the park was off-limits.

But there she was, walking through the dirt and passing by the trees. It was dark, it was unkempt, but it was different. It was far.

This looks like a place where people get lost in horror movies. I wonder if something will come after me…

Of course, that wasn’t possible. Monsters and creatures of the night didn’t exist. Trees were wood, dirt was dirt, and worms were worms. Ellette had to live with being in a world as interesting as her Math textbook.

But sometimes, it was fun to imagine.

And look! A gaping cave, where many animals could have resided! What harm could it do for Ellette to look inside? It’d only be for a second!

So into the cave she went.

Surprisingly, the cave wasn’t as exciting as Ellette expected. It was just walls of rocks, where nothing but dead leaves lay on the ground.

Why’d I waste my time like that? I should probably get back by now, my parents will start looking for me.

But there was a silhouette on the cave walls, the shape of a boy. Only, it was a statue, because there was no way a boy could be the height of a skyscraper. Too tall…he could easily grab Ellette…it was just too ridiculous…

Who spent all that time building him? He was absolutely gorgeous. He had black hair that reached his shoulders, pale, ghostly skin, wore a long-sleeved black shirt, ripped jeans, and brown boots. He had black eye makeup around his eyes. His nails weren’t nails, but claws. His ears were pointed, like an elves’.

Whoever made him must have taken a liking to alt boys and fantasy. But why didn’t they make him…normal sized? Wouldn’t that take less work? And why here, in a cave? Ellette thought to herself.

It was a bizarre find, but it was something, at least. She left her phone at home, but that was alright. She’d remember him herself.

But his chest..it was moving slightly…as though he were breathing…but he wasn’t breathing, was he? No, he wasn’t even alive…no way…

“A-are you alive?” Ellette asked. She felt like a stupid little human for asking, but it was the only thing that she thought to do.

The boy grinned at her with sharp, eldritch-like teeth and said in a rasping serpentine voice:

“Of course.”

Ellette would have screamed, but she didn’t. Annoyingly so, she didn’t even have the strength to run. She was just like the pathetic first girl to die in horror movies, doomed to die alone, doomed to go missing, doomed to-

“How did you get here?” He asked.

Ellette blinked. He wasn’t trying to kill her? But why? Why would he…

“I walked here. How are you even alive?” Ellette asked. It was a little rude, but again, she couldn’t help but ask.

“A curse. I used to be human, like you. Now I’m not.” He said.

It was a straightforward answer, he didn’t seem upset, but there was a sense of sadness, a sense of loneliness…

“I was actually bored, so I left my family and went out here. Don’t you ever get bored in here?” Ellette asked.

She only just met him, and he wasn’t human, but perhaps, he wasn’t as bad as she thought.

The boy shrugged and said:

“I always do, but at least they don’t have to see me. It’s fine, though. I get to see you.”

Ellette blushed a little. No boy had ever said that they liked to see her. She didn’t think it was that big of a deal until he said it.

“How’s life with your family? I haven’t seen mine since I was cursed. I’m pretty sure they’re all dead by now.” The boy laughed half-heartedly.

“Could be better. They sometimes stress me out, but at least they love me.” Ellette said.

Her answer sounded generic, but it was the best answer to come up with. Sometimes she hated them with every fiber of her being and wished them dead. Sometimes she loved them dearly and felt that she was terrible person for ever thinking ill of her blood.

At least you have a family. He doesn’t. Be more grateful.

Yet sometimes, the human anger crept in, despite how much Ellette tried to push it away.

“I get that. My own friends left me behind for a Christmas party. Funnily enough, that was the day a lost ornament in the woods made me what I am today.” The boy said.

“An ornament cursed you?”

It wasn’t the answer she expected, but again, life had unexpected possibilities.

“From an elf named Axira. She left it lying around. I haven’t seen her again, and I never want to.” The boy said.

“I’m sorry that happened to you. I hope that you’re at least happy here.” Ellette said. She wasn’t prepared to comfort someone who went through his unique situation, but it was the best she could do.

“It’s alright. It could be worse. At least I’m still alive.” The boy said softly.

They were both still alive, but were they truly happy? No, that wasn’t something for Ellette to worry about. She should just be grateful…

“I’d love to stay, but I have to go. My parents will probably be looking for me.” Ellette said.

“You’re not lost?”

“No. The park rangers mark the trees for people to find their way back.”

“Alright then. Goodbye.”

Ellette prepared to walk out of the cave, to go back to the reality of her world, but then:

“What’s your name?”

He wanted to know her name? He wanted to remember her? Well then…

“It’s Ellette. Yours?”

“Vaughn. You’ll come back, right? You’ll come back so I can eat you?”

“Eat me? What do you mean?” Ellette asked, goosebumps skittering around her body.

“I just met you, so I won’t do it now. But next time, I’ll eat you. I’ll eat you, and then, we can be together forever. Nothing will keep us apart. I’ll have so much time to learn about you then. I promise, Ellette. I will eat you when I see you again.” Vaughn gushed.

“Do you promise to come back?” Vaughn asked shyly.

“I will. I’ll come back to see you. I swear to it.” Ellette said.

She felt terrible for lying to him, but what else was she to do? He confessed that he was going to kill her. It wasn’t his fault, it was the only way they could be together.

But sometimes, quick interactions were meant to be fleeting moments. Nothing more, nothing less.

On she walked, to go back to her so-so family and leave the boy in the cave, where he would probably die alone and forgotten.

Time to go back home.