What happened to the good ‘ol days?
Why didn’t you stay?
The memories we lost
at what costs?
Was it hard?
Knowing that I will forever be scarred
Love or lust
I guess I’ll learn to adjust
To weekend trips
that you’ll probably skip.
I’ve been dreaming every night
that maybe, everything will be alright
but I’m still in pain
at least I have something to gain
A cautious mind,
heart left behind
A little more wise,
knowing love will die
A lesson learned
A new skill earned
Screw you,
for what you put me through
My eyes are open,
only slightly broken
Heart glued back together,
always feeling under the weather
I’ve seen the real you
never seeing things through.
I can see a new perspective
But I cannot forgive.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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125,013 Literary Works • 672,842 Reviews
These would be wonderful like song lyrics or a rap or something. The way they flow together and create the image in your mind as you read is wonderful.
"A little more wise,
knowing love will die."
I really connected with that because I realized if you open your eyes to some relationships you realize some don't have a future so you do become wiser leaving those behind and moving on with your life. You are a gifted writer and I hope to read more.
Wow, I can't believe it . . . I'm doing my first review. Okay.
First, I want to praise your hard work: Very interesting, you pulled me in, and I stayed.
I am VERY impressed,
Second: I do have a recommendation: Try to add more similes, and add more emotion to get your point across.
Again: GREAT WORK!! (Applauds)
Please write more!
wow that was a wow poem it is heavy and has a lot of emotion. you can hear what your trying to say easily. you cause it to escalate so quickly in anger and pain and so many other emotions that do not have pain. but even better you make it drop so quickly a smoothly done job. I must mention it sounds more like song lyrics but that's just music. being a musician I have a habit of trying to put music to everything its weird I don't know why I do it but that's what it seems like to me but its your work go were you want. keep writing you are a great poet and will become ultimate so I leave saying good luck and don't stop.