Reilly Soar~part 1

Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),

Hi! I'm here to leave a quick review!!

Anyway let's get right to it,

The only thing I knew at that moment was to get away, 'cause they wanted me, bad. Who wanted me? Why the towns people, of course! I shot through the woods, every tree was a blurr of green and brown. Coming to the end of the woods, there was a river. No man could cross that river without a boat, the rapids were too tough and the water too cold. I, however, could cross it. Not to brag, but I could. With one leap into the air, I flung out my wings (yes, wings) and soared higher into the sky. With every down stroke, I could feel my muscles work, and hear the wind whistle past me. Ahhh flying! I highly recommend it, good for the soul, good for the body! But, I'm getting ahead of myself, this isnt the begining, ohno! This is the begining... of the end...

The day when it all started was normal. I woke up, dressed in my breakfast gown, (yes, gown, my island country seems not to have caught on to the progress humans have made after the year 1700 A.D.) and started my morning lessons after "early meal" (a.k.a. breakfast). A bit into study of sciences, I complained to my advisor of a sore throught. My advisor, being the gullible person he is, told me to see the witch-doctor (remember, I said we're stuck in the 1700's). At the cave where Nagijuanna the witch-doctor lived, she checked me over thrice, and gave me a pill "to make me feel better". But did the pill make me feel better? Of course not! Just my luck! Instead, when I got back to the palace, (did I mention that my mother's the queen of the island of Quantara? Oops...) I sprouted, you guessed it, wings! Now everyone will love me! Or just burn me at the stake for "witchcraft", which every good townsfolk like to see! You could imagine the look on my mother's face... her beautiful young daughter, the princess, with long elegent red hair and gleaming eyes... ruined. Mother almost fainted. That was when I knew i had to fly away... but where?

But, I'm getting ahead of myself, this isnt the begining, ohno!

Thank you. I'm going to try to post part 2 in a few days, so check in soon!

twiggers wrote:The only thing I knew at that moment was to get away, 'cause Please, use the full words. Short form like that only works with speechthey wanted me, bad. Who wanted me? Why the towns people, of course! Using the exclamation mark there makes it seem like it's obvious. it's not obvious I shot through the woods, every tree was a blurr of green and brown. Coming to the end of the woods, there was a river. No man could cross that river without a boat, the rapids were too tough and the water too cold. I, however, could cross it. Not to brag, but I could. With one leap into the air, I flung out my wings (yes, wings) Brackets there are unnecessary and soared higher into the sky. With every down stroke, I could feel my muscles work, and hear the wind whistle past me. Ahhh flying! I highly recommend it, good for the soul, good for the body! But, I'm getting ahead of myself, this isnt the begining, ohno! This is the begining... of the end...
The day when it all started was normal. I woke up, dressed in my breakfast gown, (yes, gown, my island country seems not to have caught on to the progress humans have made after the year 1700 A.D.) Same, with here. use commas and started my morning lessons after "early meal" (a.k.a. breakfast) again, use commas. A bit into study of sciences, I complained to my advisor of a sore throught Throat. My advisor, being the gullible person he is, told me to see the witch-doctor (remember, I said we're stuck in the 1700's) You don't need to repeat the fact about the time. . At the cave where Nagijuanna the witch-doctor lived, she checked me over thrice, and gave me a pill "to make me feel better". But did the pill make me feel better? Of course not! Again, the exclamation mark makes it seem obvious. Just my luck! Instead, when I got back to the palace, (did I mention that my mother's the queen of the island of Quantara? Oops...) I sprouted, you guessed it, wings! Now everyone will love me! That is an overload of exclamation marks. Like, way too many. Or just burn me at the stake for "witchcraft", which every good townsfolk like to see! You could imagine the look on my mother's face... her beautiful young daughter, the princess, with long elegent red hair and gleaming eyes... ruined. Mother almost fainted. That was when I knew i had to fly away... but where?