Sometimes

I absolutely loved this. It can be related to anyone. Humans always tend to think that they aren't good enough for someone, that they don't measure up. Well, maybe not everyone, but I know I do. It causes me to believe I've been getting looked down on. But the reality can be different.

There's nothing I think you have to change. I just liked it c:

Have a good day!

-housecat

Hey there, tgirly. I don’t think we’ve ever been formally introduced but I’m lilymoore!

Anyways, I like the idea of parallelism that you used here in you poem and the way both he and she seem to be thinking the same thing at the same time. It’s a nice reflection to just how oblivious people can often be to the advances of others. Yet it’s still very vague. But that’s the beautiful thing about romance and more importantly romantic poetry. Being as vague as possible is half the battle.

The one thing that does throw me off is the lack of rhythm or much flow. That’s not always a bad thing but because of how short this poem is, the lack of flow between lines seems infinitely more distracted that it would be in a longer poem. Consider adding even a few extra descriptions here and there to add a bit of flavor to the poem and make an idea that’s been seen multiple times far more flavorful.

Overall, the biggest thing you should focus on with this poem is that you should consider putting more focus into adding extra zest to a poem. Love poems have been written time and time again so for it to be outstanding, find a way to really spice it up.

This is so cute
And true.

Well, I like this because it's simple, uncomplicated and straight down the line. It's easy to understand and practically impossible to misinterpret.

The lack of structure is different, but I wouldn't call it bad. I find it refreshing.

He doesn’t know
How his eyes make my heart
Ache.
He doesn’t get
That his smile
Is like the sun.