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E - Everyone Language

Absolute Equality

by suhani


Feminism. A word that stands for unity and equality but is often addressed with conflict and controversy. I am a Feminist. I believe every human being should be a feminist. It makes no sense to me why Feminism is seen as a system of belief that one can choose to either believe in or not. Feminism is not a belief, it’s a way of life. One needs to accept it as a basic necessity next to food, water and shelter because Feminism means Equality.

Equality is not something that one can just decide not to believe in. Equality is not like Religion where you can be a Believer or an Atheist, Equality is the basic right of every human being and no one can take it away from you. When a person says that they are not a feminist, this person is implying that “I am a human being who does not believe in making other human beings feel human”. If that sentence did not make any sense to you then worry not because such people who say they are not feminists actually don’t make any sense.

I don’t intend on attacking any group of the society and their opinions because I truly believe in respecting every individual and what they have to say, but it saddens me when I do not get the same treatment that I offer because my opinions and suggestions are coming from me, a girl. Despite living in the 21st century, an era of progressive thinkers and enlightened teenagers who know what they are doing and don’t need their parents to nag them all the time, I have felt the deep routed haunting remains of Patriarchy that once crept in our society. Of course, not in a very obvious in – your- face manner but rather in such subtlety that makes it even harder to recognize it. Microaggressions-These are even more dangerous than upfront misogyny because they hide behind the apparent humour and jest with which they are vocalised. Microaggressions are the comments which are spoken with supposed light hearted intentions but have serious and offensive implications. Ask any girl in the world if she has faced these and the answer is unfortunately positive.

I really don’t have any solutions to this problem. I don’t know what is it that I can do to stop this. I try to call it out whenever I see it or experience it but is that enough? Why is it that Feminism and its objectives are considered only a responsibility of women? Why is it that it is only the job of women to strengthen our status in society and ask for all the rights that we already deserve? Why do we girls constantly have to take the burden of coming up with solutions to the problem of gender disparity?

Feminism sure is about uplifting women but I think that lifting something from top is much easier than pushing something from bottom. Does that make any sense? What I’m trying to say here is that we seriously cannot think of coming on par with men unless we involve them or rather unless they involve themselves in this journey.

I think that it will be easier to involve men in this journey towards absolute equality, if we understand that even though they are major influencers of Patriarchy, they too are victims of it. Toxic Masculinity. Yes, that’s the unsaid disease that most men are inflicted with. They are supposed to be bold, domineering, bossy, self-assured, in control of emotions and women. Why? Because Patriarchy meant oppression of women and to oppress women, they had to become the oppressors. Hence, the characteristics of an oppressor were a necessity for them to feel like a man and be accepted as one in the society as well.

Sensitivity, gentleness, sentimentality, delicateness……be honest, didn’t these words make you think I was going to talk about Femininity? That’s how stereo typed we have inevitably become. Men who depict the aforementioned qualities are regarded as girly, weak, not man enough. Men are not supposed to cry. “Stop crying like a girl” is what they are told as children when their basic instinct of shedding a tear makes them look ‘weak’ and ‘frail’.

Well, this is not the case only with guys. This happens among us girls too. Putting on makeup, dressing up, doing your hair, painting your nails, purchasing beauty essentials, wearing pink and so on, makes a girl ‘too girly’. Wearing baggy clothes, having total disregard for makeup, dejecting the concept of beautifying yourself and pretending not to care how others perceive you makes a girl a ‘tomboy’. Tomboys are supposed to have manly traits hence the word ‘boy’. I’ll be honest, I was a ‘tomboy’ for a brief period in my life. The period where I rejected to associate myself with anything ‘girly’ and I felt proud in saying that I am a tomboy. I thought that to feel like an empowered female, I had to behave like a man, sit like a man, talk like a man. I can’t tell you how ashamed I feel for having thought that because instead of taking pride in my femininity, I considered it to be my weakness. I love watching romantic comedies, I cry at the smallest of things, I am sensitive and emotional but I tried my level best to hide these traits as I thought I would seem weak. Somewhere I feel that I associated these traits with girliness and I associated girliness with weakness.

This too is an example of sexism. I was sexist. There, I admit it. I am sorry, well I should be apologizing to myself…. sorry Suhani, for making you feel that to be a strong girl, you had to be manly. No one needs to be something they are not. Besides, this categorisation of both genders on the basis of the degree of femininity is absolutely absurd.

Being feminine or girly or simply just being a girl means accepting yourself and embracing your womanhood. A girl could like wearing makeup or wearing baggy clothes, she could like playing the cello or playing soccer, none of this, however, gives anyone the right to classify her as a girly girl or a manly girl. She is simply, a girl.

Similarly, a man’s degree of ‘supposed manliness’ does not define his strength or lack of it thereof. I think it takes great strength to show your weakness, hence, a man who can cry is probably stronger than all the muscular gym junkies out there.

Every individual has a masculine and feminine side to them. When we learn to accept both and be proud of both, equally, is when we can think of ending the sexism in our society. Relieving ourselves from the expectations of fitting the box that is unknowingly created for every gender is of paramount importance as only then could there exist absolute equality.

By-

Suhani.


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Fri Apr 23, 2021 7:54 pm
LizzyTyler wrote a review...



Wow. Just....wow. At first, I was reading this and thinking, "she's one of those people who think girls should be given everything, and that we should be on top" But then, I read on and it touched my soul. It was everything I've ever thought and more. Equality. Not oppression. The beauty of freedom and love that came from your words made my day.

-Lizzy




suhani says...


Thankyou Lizzy, glad you liked it!



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Fri Apr 23, 2021 7:50 pm
chikara wrote a review...



Hello there! I love a good informational work ~

basics

So in all of my reviews on articled and essays, I bring up formatting. The most important part of an essay, besides main topic and general consistency, is the formatting because that is what readers will see at first. A moderate first impression is basically crucial to readers enjoying or learning something from your work because it dictates reactions.

Now I'm not picky when it comes to essays and related writings, but I like to look at everything from the view of a strict professor. If the basic essay structure or outline is missing something or getting lost in other areas, that is a major thing to bring up. I can say the same about citations and actual opinions vs. factual statements.

The basics of formatting are: introduction to the general idea of the text, the body to restate ideas and give examples of why, and then it should end at a conclusion to neatly wrap up the ideas, examples, and state more about your opinions / where you found the factual evidence to support that idea. Of course, there's more, but that's a nice foundation.

The other formatting things are simply unimportant because I assume this isn't going to be graded or shown to an audience meant to critic in a educational way. If that's the case, a much more thorough look through is needed to make sure it's all good. I am not a professional at those look throughs though, so moving on -

advanced comments

Feminism is not a belief, it’s a way of life.


This is untrue. I believe that feminism is a very important thing to have around and to believe in, but some people disagree. That is not something that can be altered, and most people stuck in that mindset will not change it easily. It's a part of life to see people with feelings you disagree with, even if they are/seem harmful.

Equality is not something that one can just decide not to believe in.


It technically is; in a world with racism and classism and other -ism words, of course people can disagree with things. Is that a good thing or something to be proud of? I'd say it's actually hurting people, but like I said, people have opinions and believe in things. Nothing will change that because humans are complicated.

Equality is not like Religion where you can be a Believer or an Atheist, Equality is the basic right of every human being and no one can take it away from you.


I must bring up that throwing religion into a discussion about feminism is fine, but I'd be careful doing that in an actual essay about feminism and not religion. It's a matter of organization and making it easier for potential readers.

Ask any girl in the world if she has faced these and the answer is unfortunately positive.


This is assuming every female identifying person has faced these, which isn't true at all. Of course, the majority probably have, but the majority is not all. I'd once again suggest being careful with this kind of phrasing because it's on the borderline of throwing away all supporting evidence of your idea and general topic here.

Sensitivity, gentleness, sentimentality, delicateness……be honest, didn’t these words make you think I was going to talk about Femininity? That’s how stereo typed we have inevitably become. Men who depict the aforementioned qualities are regarded as girly, weak, not man enough. Men are not supposed to cry. “Stop crying like a girl” is what they are told as children when their basic instinct of shedding a tear makes them look ‘weak’ and ‘frail’.


An essay about toxic masculinity and how it effects men would be a nice topic for an essay because it's a problem just like sexism towards women. Although, this essay is not about that, so having that there is, once again, wandering away from the actual topic.

This has potential to be informative and still personal to your thoughts and experiences surrounding sexism and feminism, but now it's just painting with a broad brush a lot and swerving into slightly related and just unrelated ideas.

Good work ~

chi




suhani says...


Thank you for this insightful review!



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Wed Apr 21, 2021 5:35 pm
illy7896 wrote a review...



I'm so glad that you confronted this issue because I feel as if it is not talked about enough today. Although women are given rights, equality and justice in the modern era, there is still so much sexualisation involved that all females are victim to. Even at a young age, you can see the inequality and the subtle hints of discrimination from the media, tv etc. There are these signs saying that if you don't follow the latest trends or wear make-up, then you can't be considered as a validated girl. As somebody who probably does not exactly fit the 'guidelines' that a female must follow, I often feel pressured or alienated from modern society and as if I don't follow the latest trend or craze: miniskirts, make-up, interest in fashion, interest in beauty products. But when you strip away the expectations, realistically, a girl or a woman is a human being that...I ain't gonna go into the details but you follow me. Or somebody that chooses to be a female because of their sexuality.

The same happens with men, of course, but I feel as if girls are more subject to this inequality. It's always them that get called out by men or have crude comments spoken about them. But men still do have these expectations that they must follow and can sometimes feel oppressed since perhaps they do not share the traits considered as 'manly'. How many times male classmates have found it cool to say inappropriate things about girls, to show off in front of their friends. This is sexism in both perspectives.

Firstly, I loved your range of vocabulary and the way that you have gotten your point across. You have given a good detailed explanation and voiced your own opinion through concise paragraphs.

Secondly, in the third paragraph, could you show us some examples of modern sexism? What type of microaggressions do girls suffer from? How are they presented in everyday life and society?

Thirdly, I have noticed that in your work a lot of capital letters have been used unnecessarily. I have the same thing lol, I always capitalise a word that is important because I feel as if I need to. The words patriarchy and equality do not need to be capitalised unless they are at the beginning of a sentence. Just make sure that you only use capital letters at the start of a line or when referring to specific places or people.

Other than this, I absolutely adored your work and couldn't agree more! Keep writing these awesome essays!




suhani says...


Thankyou so much. Will definitely consider your suggestions!



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Wed Apr 21, 2021 7:15 am
suhani says...







Properly trained, a man can be dog's best friend.
— Corey Ford