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Hearts Afire

by sparrow143

Hey Friends... 

I'm Sparrow. That's how I like to be called😇. I'm new in Young Writers' Society. Hope all the young writers are doing good and safe. I'm here to share a story. The story of a girl and a boy. The title of the story is "Hearts Afire". Hope you'll like it. 

So here I begin my journey.... 

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User avatar
29 Reviews

Points: 3429
Reviews: 29

Fri Jan 22, 2021 11:22 pm
EtherealGarbage wrote a review...

Hey there!

It's nice to meet you, but publishing things is usually reserved for poetry or parts of novels/a short story. This feels more like it belongs on your wall, or maybe in your blogs tab. No worries though! Although, there isn't a way to actually review this. I'll give it a go:

The story of a girl and a boy.

Anything is a story of a girl and boy if the characters in it identify as such. I see the tags, so it is a romance. How do they meet, what are their personalities, etc? Of course, no need to give out all the key plot parts, but some info would be nice.

I can't decide if I like something just based off of the title of the story, the genre that could mean so many things, and a basic description of what their gender is. I could also get into that both boys and girls act like people, so just saying that isn't getting anywhere, as people are people; they do their own things.

Nitpick thing. "Afire" sounds a bit off to me, so something like "aflame" could fit into that better? A quick Google search can tell you if anyone has already named something that, so check that if you'd prefer.

Welcome to YWS! I hope you like it here!


Random avatar
sparrow143 says...

Hello friend
I'm so happy to see your response. Actually I don't know how the title came into my mind. And I was just thinking about a change of the title. It will be updated soon. Anyways thank you so much for the suggestion dear friend.

User avatar
37 Reviews

Points: 1625
Reviews: 37

Fri Jan 22, 2021 12:21 pm
Haileyg21 wrote a review...

Hiyo! Hi This is Hailey! Its nice to meet you sparrow. And I can wait for the story your gonna write. Im Using this As a before you write it Review. I think this story Is gonna be really good.
"I'm here to share a story. The story of a girl and a boy. The title of the story is "Hearts Afire"."
I think this was honestly the whole reason I wrote this because its Nice and I like that you stated it this way. So thank you. Even though this didn't need a review i gave it one because you are amazing.

Random avatar
sparrow143 says...

Hey friend
This response means a lot to me. Thank you so much for these encouraging words. There will be a change in the title of the story and it will be updated soon.

All hail the mighty Glow Cloud.
— Welcome to Night Vale