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after the war

by soundofmind


A/N: If you can, please listen to the song alongside as you read. It is recorded, played, and sung by me.  Link to the song here.

You never told me
How you felt after the war
Never said goodbye
To the corpse of your life
You left before
Tell me was it easy
Moving forward
When you knew
That all you left behind
Would be better in time
If you’d just waited
In line

I told you it gets easier
If you forget who you were
We’re always changing
Into something different
Than we were before
Tell me is it easy
Moving forward
When you know
That where you tried to go
To escape, it follows
And you can’t
Let go 

You can't let go

Tell me
Are you lying best friend
When you tell me
You’re fine
I read between the lines
I know the signs

I know the signs (x3)

You can't let go
Because you know
The people you’d love to leave
Would love to see you again
Best friend
Do you know, do you know
I can see
The turmoil in your eyes
I can see
You’re nearly hypnotized
By the dream
Of finding somewhere new
Where you can be
Someone else entirely
You don’t want to leave (not really)
You don’t want to leave (not really)
You don’t want to leave (not really)
You don’t want to leave (not really)
But you’re scared and grossly unprepared

Tell me
Are you lying best friend
When you tell me
You’re fine
I read between the lines
I know the signs

I’ll help you pick up your life
And move away from all that drains you
I’ll help you pick up your life
And move away today if that helps you


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Mon Aug 12, 2019 9:03 am
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Dreamy says...



Dude, this is so cool! why am I seeing this only now! </3 This is amazing, you're amazing! <3




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Fri Aug 09, 2019 5:25 pm
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Asith wrote a review...



As a hobbyist songwriter myself, I was intrigued, and this is genuinely one of the best amateur-written pieces I've heard. I am by no means a professional or even professionally-taught, and there's no need to take what I say as gospel. Songwriting is one of the few art forms where I'd say that the writer's view may be so entirely misrepresented by critique that they can simply ignore it.

I enjoy the simplicity of your lyricism, even though each line is packed with deep meaning. It's an interesting skill - to say heavy things in a conversational tone. It's worked for many songwriters in these types of alternative genres, and I think it's a great place for your lyricism to be in.

Listening to the song, it did feel like there was too much build-up for a chorus that is so mellow. There's nothing wrong with mellow choruses, of course, but there's always the question of whether it achieves what it's expected to achieve in the listener's ear. Try to give it an honest listen and see if there's anything missing.



You can't let go
Because you know
The people you’d love to leave
Would love to see you again
Best friend
Do you know, do you know
I can see
The turmoil in your eyes
I cans ee
You’re nearly hypnotized
By the dream
Of finding somewhere new
Where you can be
Someone else entirely
You don’t want to leave (not really)
You don’t want to leave (not really)
You don’t want to leave (not really)
You don’t want to leave (not really)
But you’re scared and grossly unprepared

This is easily my favourite part of the song. "Someone else entirely" really hit me, and your style of singing really compliments it. It reminds me of emo-leaning music that is really good at bringing out emotion through musicality. I enjoy that music, so maybe I'm just projecting.

Musically, I have a nitpick with that instrument you use at the beginning of the song - a harmonica maybe? The first two "hums" are on very awkward beats. Considering they are heard immediately as the song begins, there's no time for the listener to grasp any concept of the song's melody, so the first two hums (or even three, because the third starts ever so slightly after the expected beat) jarr into eachother. As the bars repeat, or even on a second listen, they do not sound so misplaced, but located as they are at the very beginning of the experience, they stab at the listener's sense of time. I would advise either pulling back the first hum so it lies on an even time interval (I.e. on the first beat, followed by the next note's hum on the third beat), or having two hums of the first note (adding a hum on the first beat, preceeding the hum that's already there). It is pretty much the only thing in the song that threw off my listening experience, and I fear I may not be alone it that.

Apologies if I explained my last point terribly - I only have self-taught music theory knowledge :p




soundofmind says...


Hey Asith! No worries! I totally understood what you were explaining in the end about the start of the song. I honestly agree, but somewhere in my sleep-deprived brain (as I was recording the song) I couldn't seem to find the tempo and the harmonica got off and I just didn't fix it. So yeah, totally not just you lol. I'll have to fix that,,, eventually :,)

Thanks so much for the feedback/review! I'm glad you liked the lyrics. :)



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Fri Aug 09, 2019 12:46 pm
saint1y wrote a review...



I listened to the soundtrack while reading these lyrics and i must say that everything is very good. your voice, the tune to it. It is a very good song to listen to. I also like your way with words, it is truly inspiring and I would love for this song to be the base of my book in a chapter that i will be writing at some point in the future.




soundofmind says...


Thanks for the feedback!



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Thu Aug 08, 2019 9:36 pm
Zrillis wrote a review...



Ok. I enjoyed this (I have not listened to the soundtrack)

I do have to say, however, Your rhyme pattern seems broken. The verses show thier message fine but the rhymes mess it up for me. Overall your grammer and spelling is decent, however I saw in "paragraph " 4 line 9 you wrote I cans ee instead of can see.

Overall well done.




soundofmind says...


Glad you enjoyed it! :)




If you don't know where you're going, any road'll take you there.
— George Harrison