Published May 12, 2007
I ain't tryin' to play games with you.
You can't control me.
And I can't control you.
You think your so cool
and oh so fine.
But when it's decision time.
You can't seem to tell me what's on your mind.
So I'm gonna say;What you want?
What do you need?
If you don't tell me baby I am gonna leave.
When your with your friends.
You can tell them exactly what you think.
But when your around me you freeze.
So I would like to say; What you want?
And what do you need?
Cause if you don't speak up honey
I am gonna leave.
Boy listen to me. I know you ain't shy.
You were flirtin' with me the day you met me.
I believe it's because in public you have a
reputation to uphold.
But when we are alone
you grow silent and cold.
And that has to stop!
Tell me what you want?
And what do you need?
Because I'm facin' the front door baby.
Yeah I am ready to leave.
Speak now honey.
Because I'm ready to leave.
What you want?
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139,521 Literary Works • 672,597 Reviews
Uh...it's a little shallow doncha think?
Ah... Moving this to lyrics, it seems.
I agree. As lyrics, these have potential; as poems, absolutely none. Reclassify, and keep writing!
Sooo this does sound more like lyrics than a poem though that might not have been your intent. Anyways, the only thing I find were a few minor grammatical errors, such as your when I'm pretty sure it should be you're and some semicolons that I think are unnecessary. Maybe a few analogies would be nice to spice this up a wee bit and make it even more interesting, but of course that's just a suggestion. Anyways, all in all though this still was good!
Hmm...I think I'm gonna have to start reading your poems with 'pop-punk' in mind.
Otherwise I'll just write them off as shallow.
But yeah, these should prbably be in the LYRICS section. Mmk? Lyrical poetry is not the same as lyrics.