Published January 5, 2010
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140,592 Literary Works • 673,545 Reviews
Tnx EmmaJane i'll think about it the next time...I Think i'm gonna start all over again ...
I'm really confused with what is happening in your story. I mean ... what..? Everything seems everywhere, and pretty random. Maybe you should slow down a little more and explain things more thoroughly, 'cause I don't have much of an idea of what's going on.
And cutting the number of exclamation marks and the length of the ellipses would be good, too..
C:
Happy writing,
~EmmaJane~