Blame

by reaganmcchristy

Published December 12, 2018

E - Everyone

In English 104

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Blame

We are taught self love

to be confident in the body we have

and proud of who we are

We grow up thinking this is how we should live our lives

being happy with the body we were born in

and satisfied with being ourselves

We get to high school

We get sent to the principal's office

because our shorts are too high on our sexualized legs

or because our shoulders are showing

on a day when the sun could fry an egg

We are losing that same precious class time

they are concerned that the boys would be deprived of

if they feel distracted by our looks

We are removed from the classroom

or even sent home

for wearing shorts that reach just an inch above our fingertips

We are told the boys can’t handle themselves

because of what we wear

NOT

because they haven’t learned self restraint

Why do we have to be punished for something

that is completely under the boys control

to stop

or avoid

We are told that it is our responsibility

for the lack of a boys self control

and punished for what we grew up thinking was strong

We are told that it’s our bodies fault

for how a boy acts

We are scorned for being comfortable in our own skin

As a woman, I know almost no women who like their body,

who feel good about their body,

almost none,

but you don't know how you got there.1

Until you look around and see the impact

of what’s happening in these schools

We are ruined of everything we were taught to love growing up

Works Cited

1. Wallace, Kelly. “Do School Dress Codes Body-Shame Girls?” CNN, Cable News Network, 30

May 2017, www-m.cnn.com/2017/05/30/health/school-dress-codes-body-shaming-girls-

parenting/index.html?r=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com%2F.

Comments & reviews · 4
User avatar
Caitlynn
Comment
Caitlynn commented Comment · Dec 17, 2018

I like the fact that you cited the work, giving credit is very important. I like the idea, and do agree that the dress codes can get very ridiculous, I see one typo and that's the 1 at the end of but you don't know how you got there. Otherwise very well written, and extremely truthful. Keep on improving.

User avatar
sophies36
Review
sophies36 wrote a review Review · Dec 14, 2018

Hi reaganmcchristy!! It Sophie here to review your piece!
~
Like the others said, I think it is a brilliant idea to have the works cited because it gives credit where credit is due.
~
I also like the topic of this story. Our modern world is corrupt and needs help. Writing is a great way to spread this word. Although my school dress code is pretty fair, (it's fine if we can't see your special areas) I know of some really stupid dress codes.
~
the only typo I see is this
"but you don't know how you got there.1"
i'm taking a guess but I think that's not supposed to be there.
~
other than that, this piece is very well written and very truthful. I love the meaning and slight anger behind it. it shows the piece is fighting for a cause.
~
just one more thing...
if you can, move the works cited down further so there is no confusion where the poem ends.
~
Welcome to YWS!
good job and write on

User avatar
MaybeInk
Review
MaybeInk wrote a review Review · Dec 12, 2018

Hi there, reaganmcchristy, it's MaybeInk here for a review.

First of all, I love the point you're making here, and like Bellarke mentioned, it's good that you also included the works cited.

Now, as a girl, I can understand this struggle, even though I myself have never gotten in trouble for dressing "inappropriately," but the reason why I haven't in past years gone to school in short shorts or a tank top is because I'm uncomfortable in my body. I hate my body, I hate my stomach and my thighs and my arms, but lately, I've started to come to terms with myself and love my body the way it is - rolls and all.

Anyway, I didn't notice any spelling or grammar mistakes, except for this piece here:

"but you don't know how you got there.1"

Just a guess, but I don't think that that 1 was supposed to be there.

And - just to make it easier to read - maybe move the works cited a few lines down.

Also, I noticed you are a new member, so welcome to Young Writers Society, I hope you enjoy it here as much as the rest of us!

That is all for now,
~ MaybeInk

User avatar
Bellarke
Review
Bellarke wrote a review Review · Dec 12, 2018

Hi! It is me, B!!! I am going to try to review this nice be for you!!

I just want to say that I absolutly love how you put a works cited. That was a very nice thing to do, I have not seen anyone do that on here so far.

The best part, in my opinion: "We are scorned for being comfortable in our own skin

As a woman, I know almost no women who like their body,

who feel good about their body," This shows how people feel, and I can feel the feelings in it.


HELP:
I think that you should get rid of the 1 at the end of the sentence.

"but you don't know how you got there.1"

also you should move the WORKS CITED farther down from the real poem.

That is really all that I see.

OVERALL: I loved this, you did well, and I completely agree.
Keep up the good work, and writing.
~B.



A person is more than their experiences, stacked up like stones... Our best moments are the foundations we use to reach for the sky.
— Yumi and the Nightmare Painter by Brandon Sanderson