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Published June 6, 2011
Read cover to cover
To see what lays inside
You will get a story
But can you pick out truth from lies
LIke a metaphor
I am a simile
Similar to abstract
This description is me
Many fragmented fragments
An image of imagery
You can read all I am
And still know nothing about me
Points:
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IP address:
Canary word: Present
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Original Text:
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142,228 Literary Works • 677,045 Reviews
Thank you:)
Beautiful, a sure epic for all lovers of poems, actually, I'm not a fan of poems, but this made me change my mind. You can surely write!
Though I did edit it slightly.
Congratulations. You explained a metaphor in a metaphor...in a metaphor?
okay thank you!!:)
I added in some punctuation.
Other than the missing punctuation this is a really great poem! Awesome job on the flow and word structure
Keep writing,
Alzora
okay thank you very much for the review...
I disagree in part with both of the previous reviews. First, with Amelia: While everything she says is correct, I would dispute the use of a dash in the third line. I personally would suggest a comma.
Second, with Ignatius: I thought the second stanza was quite good. A very clever use of semantics. I would, however, recommend you review the last line of the second stanza; the syntax of the line doesn't seem quite right. Perhaps "A description is of me."?
thank you for the review..
Well, it was all over the place, and I can't decide if that's good or bad. Not a bad effort, not a masterpiece, but I wouldn't count it as a failure, the nitpicks have been pointed out already, so all I will say is this: Fix the second stanza, I didn't like the simile and metaphor part, yes it was clever, but it didn't really mesh with this poem. Keep Writing!
Thank you very much I appreciate the review...
Hi! I loved this. Nitpicks:
Simply beautiful. Stunning. I was listening to a piece of classic music whilst reading this, and it was inexplicably emotive. Amazing... * sniffs *
- Amelia