Of Veils and Cloaks
What is it keeping me together?
What it is, I'll never know.
Because the smile I convey
Is eroded by the day,
By the grit and cutting grain we call the world.
So I arm myself with masks and false pretences.
I part the curtain, start the show.
But I've so few lines to say
That I've not already spoken.
How long will the pageant last,
I'll never know.
Oh, to cure this grim addiction.
Of perfection, cloaks and veils.
Though I hide in smoke and mirrors,
On occasion I do figure
That I'm not the only one, I'm not alone.
What is it keeping me from living?
What it is I'll never know.
Because the person I portray
May differ by the day,
but still the girl I am shrinks back...
She never shows.
Points:
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Canary word: Present
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,857 Reviews
This poem is very thoughtful, but I felt that the flow broke a few times.
These two lines felt a bit long to me, but they're very descriptive. All in all, your diction is good. Nice work!
This is amazing! It is really well written and the flow is good. Apart from saying 'is' twice in the first stanza and the miss spelling of pretences it is really good. I can't think of anything else to say!
Good Job!
A very deep and thoughtful poem. You might want to read the first phrase of your poem again. You wrote 'is' twice. Other than that your poem is awesome.