Warning: This work has been rated 16+.
Warning: This poem contains themes that may cause anxiety and features negative body image.
I always look forward to weekends
A break from the stresses of school
But what is the point of the weekends
If worry is all that I do?
Sometimes I forget what I look like
When I try on the clothes that I’ve bought
And when I go check in the mirror
I always look worse than I thought
I aspire to be told I am perfect
From people who don’t even know
How I push myself to keep going
When I don’t even know where to go
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125,016 Literary Works • 672,851 Reviews
That’s a touching poem. Relatable and moving. Great job. Only one note:
“School” and “do” doesn’t really rhyme as in the other stanzas. It’s has a very good meaning that I’d totally keep, but I’d also change one of these sentences so it would fit with the poem.
That’s it, keep up the good work!
Omer.
Thank you for the feedback!
Powerful, both in structure and in style. Your meter is solid, your rhyme is solid. I almost want this to become a sonnet. Just two more lines, and...man. My only suggestion for the structure is to maybe change "I am" to "I'm" in order to keep the smooth 9-8-9-8 meter that you've got going in your stanzas.
Great message, and it speaks the truth. So, good job.
Thank you for the feedback!
I love this! This... pretty much sums it up. I especially love the last line.