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Young Writers Society



Poor Packers of the Pond

by parker-c-penne


Frivolous of me to say,
Poor packers of the stoney pond.

That lightened whispers will some day,
Free you of your acidic bond.

Please walk lightly while you may,
French strudle of the meagre, conned.

I'll tell then again someday,
Of stories, legends, true and fond.

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57 Reviews

Points: 890
Reviews: 57

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Thu Mar 15, 2007 9:35 pm
Goldenheart wrote a review...



Hey!

Your rhythm was nice, and I just loved the way the lines were situated, alternating between the same two sounds all the way through. Truly unique and interesting! I... I don't understand every bit of it...(Sheepish smile).. but I'm sure I'm simply reading it wrong. I got most of it, though, and I like it. Very well done! Keep it up!

All the best,

Goldie





My existence is political. And love is my statement.
— Kevin Abstract