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Secret Agents of Fate (Part 1)

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Ember

“Run!” I zoom through the stairwell as Josh yells over me from upstairs. Adrenaline was flowing through my bones. Obviously, if we hear bullets we’re supposed to run out of the way. I dash through the exit of the apartment and make a run for it into our van. Josh erupts out of the door after a few seconds and he barely makes it into the van before we head off to our headquarters.

“That was way too close,” Keira says from the driver's seat. “You guys are getting in big trouble when we get back.” I sigh. It was a really close call but we almost got him. All we had to do was keep him there until the police came.

“You did well today Ember,” Sam says from the seat across from me. The van was quite small but we loved it.

“Thanks, Sam,” I mutter back to him. I loved our group. It was the 8 of us on a mission to stop weapon dealers across our city. Sure we all were just teenagers, but we were strong and smarter than most out there. Mike wouldn’t have chosen us if we weren’t capable, but he was definitely going to yell at us today. As we make it to the headquarters I wonder how we’re supposed to make it up to Mike for all the mistakes we made today.

Mike stands outside headquarters as if knowing exactly when we would be arriving. All of us head to the main room and sit down at the table. Sam and Josh are fighting over who gets the comfy chair. I roll my eyes, they were never going to grow up. Kiera sits down next to me and the other four appear from behind. Me and Kiera were the only girls on the team so we usually had each other's back. Soon Mike comes in and has a seat from across us. He has an angry flare in his eyes. Oh no, this was going to be bad.

Mike looks straight at us as he talks. “You guys can’t keep making major mistakes like this!” Mike yells. Yup, he was mad. Mike was the adult and the head of our group. His whole mission was to search for teenagers like us to form a group where we fight evil. “Josh, you knew how dangerous going up to the room was, and yet you still risked it! What have I taught you guys, safety first! If one of you gets hurt it's on me and we have to shut down immediately.” Josh turns red. All of us choose to be here. We had to sign a whole contract and were told that we had high chance of being killed.

“S-sorry sir it won’t happen again.” Mike nods, still mad.

“And for you Ms. Ember. Why the hell did you think it was a good idea to break through inside the apartment? You know how alarms are installed everywhere and yet you risked it.” I look down guilty. Liam stares sympathetically at me from across the table and Keira tries to comfort me.

“It won’t happen again, I promise,” I say. Mike sighs and gets up.

“All of you are dismissed, we’ll see you on Tuesday,” he states. Our group meets every Saturday and Tuesday. We try to complete a mission each month so now we have to try again next month. All of us exit the room and stare at each other. Liam and Blair start talking about the mission and how we did mess up today. Josh appears next to me and pats my shoulder.

“It's so weird to get yelled at by Mike isn’t it,” he says. I nod my head in agreement.

“Yes, but I mean we were wrong in a way it was really risky.”

“I know but what else could we have done, it was the only way in,” he replies.

“I guess.” We talk a bit more and soon go our separate ways once we’re outside. I can’t help but wonder how boring life would be without the TIA.

Lyra

The first day of a new school can definitely be scary but I was definitely more than just scared. My hands were shaking. I hated this place the second I walked in and I definitely wanted nothing to do with it. It was a small school and that meant that they never had new kids who transferred mid-year. I sigh and try to relax.

All I needed to do was get through my classes and this day would be over. I take deep breaths as I walk to my locker. I had already claimed it when I came for a school tour the other day. I take my books out of my locker until I feel someone pocking me from behind. I turn around and I was facing a tall guy who looked like he was in 9th grade and probably played football.

“Hey there, I’m Leo,” He says lifting his hand out for me to shake. When I don’t shake it and look at him in confusion, he continues. “I heard you’re the new girl, I was wondering if you wanted to hang out? I can show you to your classes,” He says with a weird grin on his face. Was this kid hitting on me?

“Uh no thanks,” I say politely and I walk to my first class without looking back. What the hell was that? It hadn’t even been a minute since I had been in the school and the guys were already hitting on me. Lost in my thoughts I lose attention to my surroundings and I crash into somebody.

“Ow-” I yell. Could this day literally get worse? I look up at the person who I crashed into. It was a girl with smooth black hair and light brown eyes. Damn, she was beautiful.

“Can people not watch where they are going? What is wrong with you?” She says annoyed. I take a step back. Why was she being so mean? She barely even got hurt. I roll my eyes.

“Jeez, I didn’t think it was illegal to crash into someone who was walking super fast in a crowded hallway,” I say smugly. Who did she think she was? I watch as she gets even more annoyed.

“I was looking for a sorry but maybe you’re just so full of yourself that you can’t even say that,” She spats. Then she walks away without turning back and I head to my first class. Maybe I should have just stuck with the other dude.

At lunch, I get my food tray and look around the cafeteria. I had no clue where to sit. Suddenly Leo appears right in front of me smiling.

“Hey, wanna sit with us?” He asks. I really didn’t want to sit with annoying teenage boys but what could I do? I smile back.

“Sure,” I say and I follow them to their table. When I arrive with Leo all of them turn to look at me and stare at each other in a knowing way. One of them whispers, “She’s so hot” but Leo nudges him and makes space for me. I sit down. This was going to be super awkward.

“So, you’re new here right?” Leo asks. I nod.

“Yes, I just transferred here.” My parents moved here because of work and enrolled me in the hardest school in town. They knew how smart I was even though they never acknowledged it. I had a pretty high IQ from a young age and it only got better. I used to put my skill into hacking and computer work. Computers were my best friend.

“So are you single?” One of the boys across the table asks. Leo shuts him up just as fast.

“Ignore him, he's just a pussy,” he says. “What's your name?” he asks me.

“Lyra,” I answer. By the time lunch ends a lot of people know that I’m the new girl and even come up to me to introduce themselves. I’m pleased by the attention but I still can’t help but think about how much I’m going to hate this place.

Ember

I come home from school super tired. It was such a bad day. I almost failed my math test and I couldn’t even go to the gym today. The only reason I was in TIA was because of my physical capabilities. I’ve won nationals in many sports and exercise-related things. The TIA stands for the teenage intelligence agency. I thought the name was really cool.

“How was school today, Ember?” my dad asks me. I sigh.

“It was okay I guess.” Dad smiles and sits on the couch. Mom calls me from the kitchen and tells me to come to eat lunch. After lunch, I go to my room and open up my phone. I have many texts from Ria who has been my best friend since 2nd grade. I open up the texts.

Are you coming over on Sunday? Also, have you heard about the new girl, apparently every guy has a crush on her. I roll my eyes. Everyone has been talking about her non-stop today. She's been labeled as the new hot girl. I mean yes she was hot but she had a big attitude. I know I was a little dramatic when we crashed into each other today but what can I say? I was in a rush and in a bad mood and she didn’t help.

Yes, I’ll come over on Sunday. And yes I’ve heard about the new girl. Ria starts typing back.

Have you met her yet?? I think you guys would be cute together. I roll my eyes. I told Ria I was gay a year ago and she’s been trying to find me a girlfriend ever since. I text back.

No thanks, not my type. She was definitely my type but I didn’t want to talk about the new girl anymore so I close my phone and do some homework. Tomorrow was the TIA meeting and I could not wait.

***

I was sitting in math class looking at the equations on the board. I was basically counting down the minutes until school was over and I could go to TIA. At lunch, I sit down next to Ria and our other friends.

“Excited for volunteering today?” She asks smiling. Since the TIA was top secret I couldn’t tell anyone so I just told my parents and my friends that I had been volunteering. They all thought that it was super sweet that I did free volunteering at a senior center.

“Yes, I can’t wait,” I say back. The conversation continues as they start talking about the English test today and the homework we got. I zone out and look around. Our lunchroom was quite big even though we barely had any students. I spot the new girl at the corner of the lunch room sitting with all the grade 9 boys. I almost laugh out loud. She was a senior and she was sitting with grade 9’s. It was way too funny. To be fair she did look very uncomfortable. Well, thats what she deserves for being so rude.

“Y’know you could always ask her if she wants to sit with us,” Ria says. I turn back to my friends not realizing that I was staring too long. I narrow my eyes at Ria.

“No thanks,” I say back. Ria raises her eyebrows like she knows I want to.

“Your loss.” Then she goes back to the conversation with the others about the test. I stare at my food and start counting down till I could get out of here.

After school is finally done I say bye to my friends and head to TIA. I had the whole route memorized and I was proud of it. As I enter headquarters I hear my name.

“Ember!” I turn around and see Keira behind me. I wait for her to catch up and give her a hug. Finally, it's time for the fun to start. Keira starts talking to me about school and then says something that catches my attention.

“Apparently we have a new member today.” Before I could say anything else Mike is calling me from upstairs. I walk slowly to the stairway wondering who the new member could be. I climb the stairs in confusion until I see a familiar face standing right next to Mike.

No way. No way our new member was the new girl from school.

“This is Lyra. She’s a new member here at the TIA with a lot of experience with computers and she comes up with incredible master plans,” Mike says like it's an everyday ordeal that we have new members. So her name was Lyra. Interesting. I look at Lyra. She looks just as shocked to see me and I can see that she's just as happy to see me as I’m happy to see her.

“Hi Lyra,” I spat out. I know it's childish of me to still be mad at her but I don’t care. Mike looks surprised.

“Do you guys know each other?” He asks. I narrow my eyes at Lyra and she does the same back.

“Yes,” Lyra says when I don’t reply. Mike smiles happily and looks relieved. I can’t believe he hasn’t noticed us giving each other a death stare.

“That's even better because I was thinking that since Lyra isn’t as skilled with the physical stuff and is new to the TIA if you could teach her how to fit in. We won’t be having a proper mission in a while so this is the perfect time for you to teach her our ways,” Mike says happily. It takes me a second to process everything he just said. Did he just ask me to teach my mortal enemy? No way. Lyra looks just as horrified by this thought. I’m just about to say no until I realize that I can’t really decline. I need Mike to trust me so that I can keep going on missions and be one of the main heads.

“Ok,” I say reluctantly. Lyra looks shocked as if she was expecting me to say no.

“Great, how about you give her a tour around our headquarters,” Mike says. He hasn’t been this happy since our last successful mission 2 months ago. He leaves us alone and I look at Lyra.

“I thought for sure that you were going to say no,” She says.

“You wish. I’m not trying to be nice, I just don’t want Mike to hate me,” I mutter back. She shrugs like she could care less and we walk towards the main room. All I had to do was show her around and then we could carry on with the meeting.

“So, this is the main room. This is where we have most of our meetings,” I say. Lyra looks around in awe and I can’t help but stare at her. She has nice dark hair and very soft features. Her hazel eyes were shining. She catches me staring and I look away. Ugh, I had to stop acting like a creep.

“This is such a big place,” She says with a smile on her face. I nod, knowingly. When I first joined I loved our headquarters. After a minute we walk away from the main room and head to the only other room we had which was the guest room. Our guest room wasn’t really a guest room but more like a hang-out space where we all played video games or watched tv. As we were walking Liam and Josh were heading our way to get to the main room. Josh looks at me and then over to Lyra and his eyes widen.

“Oh, you’re the new member Mike was talking about,” Josh says smiling. He puts his hand out and Lyra shakes it. “I’m Josh, nice to meet you.” Lyra nods.

“I’m Lyra it's nice to meet you too,” She says.

“I see you’ve already met Ember. She's a pain just trying to warn you,” Josh smiles mischievously. I roll my eyes, of course Josh would say that.

“I can tell. I don’t know how you deal with her,” She whispers back as if I can’t hear her. I narrow my eyes at them. After talking about the most random things Josh says bye and heads back to the main room.

“Everyone here is pretty nice except you,” Lyra jokes. I give her a stare.

“Yes, I don’t really consider myself ‘nice’,” I say annoyed. Lyra rolls her eyes and walks ahead into the guest room. I follow behind.

“This is a nice place,” She says. I nod.

After a while, we both head back to the main room for the meeting.

Lyra

When I thought about joining the TIA I wasn’t expecting it to be this professional. I wasn’t expecting that Ember would be here either. During the meeting, Mike talks about the people on his list that he knows are secretly selling illegal weapons. Our job is to blow their cover and make sure they don’t run away until the police come. It sounded dangerous and it probably was but for some reason it felt exciting to do something like this, to be a part of a secret organization with other exceptionally skilled teenagers. I was already planning out a way to do this in my head. I would probably map it out on my computer when we got home.

After a few minutes of listening to Mike, I look around at everyone and smile. I liked this. Then I look at Ember. She looks so focused on what Mike was saying and I could tell that she was planning everything out in her brain like I was. Mike had told me that she could do all the physical stuff like jumping over stairs, fighting, and running super fast. I had to admit it sounds very impressive.

Ember was wearing a leather jacket today. It was the first time I was seeing her without her school uniform and she looks so relaxed and off guard.

Ember looks around as if she feels someone staring at her. When she finds that it's me she raises her eyebrows and mouths “Pay attention”. I roll my eyes and look back at Mike. I couldn’t believe that Ember was going to be training me. We would definitely be fighting half of the time but a part of me was excited.

After the meeting, a lot of the members came up to introduce themselves to me. They were all really cool and unique in their own way. Everyone had different roles in the TIA and all of them were super important. As we were exiting the building to go home Ember catches up to me.

“How was your first meeting?” She asks. I look over at her surprised.

“It was good, I actually quite enjoyed it,” I say back. She smiles and I wonder why she was being nice to me all of a sudden. Then I notice Mike in the distance watching us. Oh, so she was trying to make a good impression for him. A part of me was disappointed but I pushed that down.

“Ya, I’ll see you at school then,” I say. Her eyes widen a bit as if she was expecting me to continue the conversation.

“Oh alright. Ya, I’ll see you at school. Also, our training starts at 4 tomorrow at our gym, don’t be late,” She says. Then she goes the other way to catch the city bus and I turn the other way to go home. This was going to be interesting.

Ember

At school the next day I make my way to my locker and replay all the things that happened at TIA in my mind. It was really weird knowing that another person at my school knew my secret and was a part of the TIA. Out of all the people at my school, I didn’t expect Lyra to be our new member. Actually, I was more shocked that we even had a new member. We hadn’t had a new member for a year.

As I make my way to my math class Ria comes up to me. I was actually really happy to see her today. She’s always been by my side no matter what.

“Ready for the quiz today?” She asks. I sigh. I had to study for it so late last night.

“I think so,” I say back. She nods.

“Good luck.”

When it was finally time for lunch I was trying to figure out what I would teach Lyra at our training today. She had to learn basic skills like jumping from high areas, basic self-defense and running fast. These were life-saving skills that come to use when we do our missions. I feel a nudge on my shoulder and I turn to see that it was Ria.

“What are you thinking about?” She asks looking at me. I had to stop zoning out.

“Nothing,” I reply back in the least suspicious tone I could manage. Before she could say anything else our other friends come and join us at our table. After a while, they start gossiping about recent news at our school.

“Did you know Brian cheated on his exam and he’s suspended for a full week?” Lydia says. Ria and Nora both pry for more details. A full 5 minutes pass with them talking about how exactly he managed to cheat until Nora says something that catches my attention.

“Anyone know why the new girl sits with the grade 9s?”

“Apparently Leo took her in and everyone is asking him for tips cause seriously how the hell did he manage to pull her,” Lydia says.

“Wait are they dating?” I ask without thinking. Now all eyes are on me. I blush and yell at myself for not thinking before speaking.

“I don’t know but why else would she willingly sit with the grade 9s,” Lydia says. Ria looks over at me suspiciously and whispers in my ear.

“Jealous much?” I glare at her. She is the only one in our group who knew I like girls so I knew she was going to tease me about it.

“It was just a question!” I whisper back. Lydia and Nora have now started talking about something else. After lunch is over I go to my last two classes. It was almost time for the training.

***

School was finally over for the day and I was so happy. I go to my locker and start to put my books inside until I hear someone talking from the other side of the hallway. Mostly everyone had left school by now. Curiously I look over my shoulder and see Leo and Lyra. My mouth almost fell open. Maybe the rumors were true. I knew it was wrong to eavesdrop but I couldn’t help myself.

“Hey Lyra, can I ask you something,” Leo says. Lyra looks uncomfortable but nods.

“Sure,” She says.

“I was wondering if you wanted to go on a date with me?” Leo asks nervously. If I was shocked before I was definitely even more shocked now. I look over at Lyra to see her reaction. She looks so uncomfortable I almost laugh. She did not want to be there.

“Um no sorry,” She says looking a little ashamed. Leo looks a little shocked as if he was expecting Lyra to say yes. How the hell does this idiot not see how uncomfortable she looks?

“That's ok, I’ll see you tomorrow then,” He says then walks the other way. Lyra stays there for a second looking at the wall in front of her and I realize that I wasn’t supposed to be there. Before I could turn around Lyra looks right at me and her eyes widen. Oh, no.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to eavesdrop,” I say guiltily.

“That's ok,” she says looking more embarrassed. I close my locker and walk over to her.

“We have training now, remember,” I say trying to change the topic. I point to my watch which says 4:05. I smile. “And you’re late.” Lyra seems to relax.

“Shut up you’re late too and you’re my teacher so,” She shrugs. I laugh. Then we walk towards the gym.

“Can I ask you a question?” I say. She looks over at me and nods. “Why are you hanging out with grade 9s? I mean I’m not judging,” I pause for a second. “ok I kind of am but y’know you can hang out with seniors right?” Lyra looks away.

“I didn’t really have anyone else to sit next to and no one else really offered,” She says quietly looking embarrassed again. Before I could think about what I was saying I reply back.

“You can sit with me if you want.” Lyra looks at me with her eyebrows raised.

“Oh so now you’re being the nice girl?” She says teasingly.

“You wish, I just can’t stand you embarrassing yourself by hanging out with the freshman,” I say smugly. She laughs and I smile. I was going to bully her about it all the time.

Lyra

By the time an hour had passed, I was breathing so hard and sweating like crazy. This was complete torture, what had I signed up for?

“Ok it's time for you to do one last round for today,” Ember says standing in front of me. We started with running today and I was in awe at how she didn’t even look tired. Then there was me who was panting like crazy and it felt like my legs were going to come off. I hated her for being better and I obviously was not going to admit that I was just jealous.

“How the hell… are you… not … dying,” I say in between breaths. Ember smiles at me like she knows that she's amazing.

“You just got to keep practicing. Now come on one more round around the gym,” She says and then takes off. I follow behind her going super slow because there was no way I had enough energy to keep up with her. After the round, I collapse on the gym floor and lean my head against the wall. I was so tired. Ember laughs watching but soon sits down next to me.

“So how was the first training?” Ember asks. I turn my head toward her and realize how close we were to each other. I suddenly feel nervous.

“It was torture,” I say. Ember nods like she knows how much I struggled. We sit there for a while until she breaks the silence again.

“We should probably get going, I have a lot of homework,” She says. I nod and get up as she grabs her stuff. We walk outside and face each other. It was almost dark now.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Ember says smiling. I smile back. I can’t help but wonder how she managed to look so pretty even after we were running for a whole hour.

“See you,” I say back. And then we walk our separate ways.

***

I come home and put my stuff down in the living room. The last place I wanted to be was here. My mom comes from her room and sees me.

“You’re finally here! What daughter have we ended up with? Useless can’t even come home on time,” She says. I try to ignore her insults even though they cut through me.

“I told you before school Mom, I was exercising. I did some running,” I say quietly. She looks at me with so much shock.

“You exercising? You can’t even run a block! Always on your stupid computer doing who knows what,” She says. I look down. This was a daily occurrence. I would come home I would get yelled at. Then my dad would come home and yell at me more. I’ve learned to block out their negative comments but I still remember a time when I would take it to heart and cry every night. “Go to your room!” I go into my room and take out my homework to distract myself. Even though I was a top student with a pretty high IQ my parents still hate me.

The next day at school I try to ignore Leo for as long as possible. I really hope Ember would ask if I wanted to sit with her because I didn’t want to deal with the guys today. My legs were still sore from yesterday so it was a pain to try and walk anywhere. Maybe the training wasn’t for me. When it was finally time for lunch I stood with my tray at the front of the cafeteria, trying to look for Ember.

“Lyra! Over here!” I look around and spot Ember sitting at the lunch table with her friends. She waves me over. My body relaxes and I’m relieved. I walk over to their table and sit down next to Ember.

“Thank you for letting me sit here,” I tell her. She smiles.

“No problem.” I smile and enjoy the conversations that weren’t about football or other weird stuff. After a while, they started talking about the math test and their math averages.

“Lyra what's your average so far in math?” Some girl with blond hair asks me.

“A 98,” I say back. Everyone looks at me with wide eyes. Ember looks the most shocked. I almost laugh. How did she think I was in the TIA?

“That's so good, you’re like a genius what the hell?” The blond hair tells me. I smile. I don’t get complimented that much on my grades.

“Thank you,” I say.

“And I thought that I could beat you at everything,” Ember says to me. I laugh.

“You wish,” I say back.

Ember

A few weeks had passed as I was training Lyra and we were making a proper plan at the TIA. Our mission would be held in a few weeks and I was really pumped for it. Lyra had improved a lot since we first started and I was getting to know Lyra better.

I head to the gym for our training. Today I was going to do something different. I was going to try to teach her how to do some skateboarding. Lyra had this fear inside of her that I wanted to get rid of. She was getting better at running and even self-defense but I could sense hesitation in her whenever she did anything. I was going to help her with that. As I approach the gym I see Lyra waiting for me outside. She was wearing a cute shirt and jeans. One thing about Lyra was that she could look pretty in everything.

“I can’t believe I come here after school to do exercise,” She says as I walk closer. I smile mischievously.

“Lucky for you I have something different planned today,” I say. She raises her eyebrows in curiosity.

‘What?”

“I’m going to teach you how to skateboard near the boardwalk.” Lyra looks surprised.

“Uhhh, I’ve never skateboarded before,” She says looking away. I smile. I knew she was going to resist but I had to make her more confident.

“That's why I’m going to teach you. Come on,” I say. We both exit the school to take the city bus and end up at the boardwalk in half an hour. It was a nice windy day out and there were so many people at the beach. Lyra walks close to me. I almost forgot that she was new to the town so she probably hasn’t been here before. I look around for a quiet empty spot where I could teach her and spot one next to the beach on the far end of the boardwalk. I take her hand gently and take her through the crowd. I lead her to the spot and finally drop the skateboard on the ground. She leaves my hand and helps me set the skateboard properly.

“So how do you like the place?” I ask. She looks around nervously and nods.

“It's ok.”

“Don’t worry I’ll try to make sure you don’t fall. Or I’ll just push you off when I feel like it,” I say jokingly trying to lighten the mood. Lyra finally smiles.

“Oh really? You think I’m that weak that you can just push me off whenever you feel like it?” She says smugly. I laugh and shove her in a playful way. She shoves me back and I pretend like I’m falling over. We laugh harder.

“Okay I actually have to teach you this or I’ll be fired from the job,” I joke after we both calm down. She raises her eyebrows and I continue. “Ok first I’ll show you how I do it and then you can try.” I step on the skateboard and get my balance right. Then I skate off on the boardwalk and turn around to go back. When I get back to Lyra she looks at me like I just did the coolest thing ever. I look at her smiling. “Trust me it's not that scary,” I say.

“I know but I have horrible balance,” She says back.

“Just try.” She nods reluctantly and tries to get onto the skateboard.

“Here put your feet straight and try to find your balance,” I say. She tries to get her feet right but in doing so she almost falls over. I grab her hands before she does. “It's ok, I got you,” I say softly. She looks at me and gulps. “Is it ok if I hold your hands so you don’t fall over?” I ask. She stares at me and nods nervously and my heart beats faster. I take her hand again and feel tingles all over.

“Ok now try to skate. Put one of your feet down on the ground and push yourself so that you can go,” I say. She looks back at me and I could tell that she was a little scared. “Don’t worry I’ll hold onto you the whole way, you won’t fall,” I say gently. She looks away hesitantly. “I’ll get you ice cream afterward,” I say mischievously. Lyra’s eyes sparkle and I know I said the right thing.

“Oh really? Are you trying to lure me into doing this by using ice cream,” She says smiling. I smile back.

“Yes.” She sighs and finally starts to drive forward. I hold her hand and run with her until the skateboard slowly comes to a stop.

“Ok that wasn’t so bad,” She says. I smile. We keep skateboarding for a bit and then she asks if she could try it herself. She had this hard look in her eye and I couldn’t help but be proud of her. This is why I wanted to do this. She finally looks confident in what she was doing and I hope it would carry over to the other stuff in the training. I watch as she takes off on her own and this time she goes really fast. I follow slowly behind her and she keeps going after the skateboard stops. I laugh and run after her. She was enjoying this. Then I watch as she goes a little too fast and loses her balance but luckily she catches herself in the grass. I finally catch up to her.

“Are you ok?” I ask smiling. I knew she was fine because she had a huge smile on her face.

“Yeah that was fun,” She says. My smile grew bigger knowing that my idea worked.

“I’m proud of you,” I say. Lyra smiles mischievously.

“Ya well you won’t be proud after I ask you to buy me the most expensive ice cream from Mama Rosas,” She says. I laugh.

“Who said I’m going to be paying for it.” I can’t help but stare at her beautiful hazel eyes.

“Hey! You literally promised me,” She says smiling. I end up taking her to Mama Rosas. It was dark now and the wind felt cold against my skin. When we get to the shop we end up fighting over who gets to pay.

“I literally told you I would pay!” I say to her.

“Oh ya but I’m the one that choose this store so I get to pay,” She says back. I roll my eyes and let her pay. I didn’t want to cause a scene in front of everyone. We sit at a booth waiting for our ice cream. I didn’t want this night to end.

“Hey, Ember. I just wanted to say thanks for today I actually really enjoyed learning something new,” Lyra says. I smile.

“So you finally admit that I’m not annoying or mean?” I say to her. Lyra narrows her eyes.

“Shut up,” She says. I laugh. When our ice cream finally comes we dive in. I look over at Lyra as she eats her ice cream. The light from the ceiling made her hair sparkle in the night. She looks so beautiful that my stomach starts doing somersaults. I was staring too long because Lyra looks up at me and raises her eyebrows curiously. I just shake my head and go back to eating. Now that I thought about it, this kind of felt like a date. I remind myself that she probably didn’t think of it like that. She was probably straight anyway.

“Ember?” Lyra says. I look at her again.

“Yes?” Lyra looks away and takes a breath.

“I was just wondering, why did you decide to take me skateboarding today? It's kind of unusual because we usually just do running or other things,” She says. I look down at my ice cream figuring out what to say.

“Because I wanted you to be more confident. Whenever you’re doing the activities I tell you to do you always look hesitant and scared when you’re doing those things perfectly fine. I thought that maybe teaching you a new skill would boost your confidence.” I look at Lyra after I say all that. Hopefully, I hadn’t made her feel bad. Lyra just looks at me with a soft expression on her face. My heart starts beating faster and my stomach was doing somersaults again. Why did she have this effect on me? She puts her hand over mine on the table.

“Thank you,” She says softly. My heart was beating so fast it probably would have erupted but I manage a smile. I was glad that I had helped her today. 

Comments & reviews · 5
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musiclover2006 Comment
Stickied · musiclover2006 commented · Tue Aug 22, 2023 7:18 pm

Hi! I'm here for a review! I love this piece! The writing style is gourgous and I'm really invested in the story. My one question is, it's unclear what the problem of this story is? Will Lyra and Ember fall in love? Will there be a big evil they have to fight? I'm sure this can be solved with a new chapter. Also, I love the way that they have to keep they're identities as members of the TIA secret. Does the public know about the TIA? All in all, amazing book. Can't wait for the next chapter!

Hi! I'm here for a review! I love this piece! The writing style is gourgous and I'm really invested in the story. My one question is, it's unclear what the problem of this story is? Will Lyra and Ember fall in love? Will there be a big evil they have to fight? I'm sure this can be solved with a new chapter. Also, I love the way that they have to keep they're identities as members of the TIA secret. Does the public know about the TIA? All in all, amazing book. Can't wait for the next chapter!

Thank you so much! I really appreciate your review! And yes they have to complete a mission which will be shown in the next chapters :))

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Roxanne
Review
Roxanne wrote a review · Thu Sep 14, 2023 9:51 pm

Greetings Storyteller!

Beyond my beloved horizon, I'm setting sail into uncharted pages with an itch for adventure. Through binoculars, I spy with my little eye a story titled “Secret Agents of Fate” that deserves a good review. Therefore without further ado, let us begin.

Image

I. Unraveling The Opener
Your story opens with a high-adrenaline action scene, more like an unsuccessful mission that seems to have some terrible consequences. There a many characters introduced in this scene, it's a bit confusing at first but later on it gets better. I must say, you have an extremely wide imagination; I mean, kiddos as undercover agents? That is new, but a good kind of new.
The title of your story is also a good one, it is one of the many things that makes a story better.

II. Writing Style & Variety
Your writing style is very descriptive, especially at this part:

“Run!” I zoom through the stairwell as Josh yells over me from upstairs. Adrenaline was flowing through my bones. Obviously, if we hear bullets we’re supposed to run out of the way. I dash through the exit of the apartment and make a run for it into our van. Josh erupts out of the door after a few seconds and he barely makes it into the van before we head off to our headquarters.

“That was way too close,” Keira says from the driver's seat. “You guys are getting in big trouble when we get back.” I sigh. It was a really close call but we almost got him. All we had to do was keep him there until the police came.

The imagery of your story makes everything seem more lively and vivid. For instance; "I zoom through the stairwell" and "Josh erupts out of the door".
Throughout the story you maintain a normal style, but it is okay to throw a bunch more descriptive sentences in there.

III. The Door To Improvement
I feel like you need to consider cutting this part into two or maybe even three other parts, not only will this help to make it easier to read, but also easier to review. That way you can also focus more on certain parts of the story, like the high-adrenaline scene.

As I mentioned before, including more descriptive sentences in your tale can add vitality to your narrative. This simple technique can breathe life into your story, making it more engaging and enjoyable for your readers.
Furthermore, think about more character development and descriptive settings.
These suggestions are offered with the intention of boosting the story's depth and impact, so I hope they are helpful.

IV. All in All
The story can further elevate its impact with a few additional enhancements. By incorporating more descriptive sentences, the narrative gains depth and becomes even more engaging.
With just a touch more refinement, this story has the potential to evolve into an even more compelling and memorable read. Good luck with your future writing projects!

That's it, that's all.
Hoping the review has been of value to you!

Yours in Puzzling Shadows,
Rose

Thank you so much for your review! It really helps a lot, I appreciate it :)

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foxmaster
Review

hey, foxmaster here for a review!
I really liked this piece, and I found it really interesting. It's clear you're a good writer, and I'm surprised that you didn't get many reviews on it yet.
However, I did find errors, which is why I'm here, to correct them!
First of all, I found that you flip-flopped through past-present tense very often here, which kind of confused me, I didn't understand, you could probably fix that.

“It's so weird to get yelled at by Mike isn’t it,” he says.

often, when people speak, or something like that, you don't put commas, making their sentences choppy, and slightly emotionless, if you see what I mean. That could easily be fixed.
“Jeez, I didn’t think it was illegal to crash into someone who was walking super fast in a crowded hallway,” I say smugly. Who did she think she was? I watch as she gets even more annoyed.

here, I had reread that sentence a few times, because I couldn't really understand it.
And, that's about it! I found this really interesting, and I look forwards to continuing this. If you're looking for anything to review, you could do my work, or you could join my RP, "The Mysteries of YWS"
happy writing,
foxmaster

Thank you so much for you review! I really appreciate it :)



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