z

Young Writers Society


E - Everyone

The Story of Mother Nature and The Slasher

by mothernature10


There once was a town with few crooks, an extravagant amount of nature, and loving townspeople. This town was called Greenville. Mother Nature was a creature who lived in the forest of Greenville. She had grown up in this town with her brother, Nathaniel, and her parents. Although Mother Nature is as powerful as can be now, she hasn’t always been.

Mother Nature, who was called Edyth at the time of her childhood, and her brother Nathaniel raced into the woods to play. Nathaniel ran ahead of her, so she sped with all of her might to catch up to him. In the process of the racing, Edyth fell into a gigantic hole full of vines, diamonds, and many other earth elements.

“Nathaniel!” Edyth wailed, “Where are you? I fell into a deep hole”.

“I See you,” Her brother came to the rescue, “Reach for my hand!”

A vigorous force shoved Nathaniel into the air, far away from Edyth.

“You are mine now,” A horrific creature instructed the young girl, “My life is close to its end. I need someone to take my place as The Nature Goddess. You will become Mother Nature”.

All Edyth wanted to do was escape, “Why me? Why can’t you pick someone who actually wants to be a nature freak? Or at least ask me in a polite way instead of digging a hole to put me in!”

The creature ignored Edyth’s concerns and moved her hands above Edyth in a circular motion, almost like a chant. Strong winds traveled through the trees, a thunderstorm arose, and the ground began to shake.

“Nathaniel! I’m gonna pass out! Help me,” Edyth could barely sit up straight, and neither could The Nature Goddess. She was losing her power, and Edyth was gaining it.

Suddenly, everything came to a complete halt. Edyth and The Nature Goddess both stared into the clouds without saying a single word. They sat up straight, both moving side to side in a demonic, but yet peaceful manner. Nathaniel ran as quietly as he could to his sister without disturbing the goddess.

“Edyth,” Nathaniel jumped into the hole and shook Edyth in hopes of waking her out of her thorough daze, “Wake up, wake up now! We need to get out of here”.

Edyth finally started to awake, “What- what just happened?”

“You don’t remember? How can you not remember what just happened,” Nathaniel asked.

“I don’t know. The last thing I remember is us racing into the forest. Where are we now?” Edyth lost all memory of the trauma.

“What?! You don’t recall me being thrown into the air by a nature freak? And you, being summoned to become something called Mother Nature,” her brother was bewildered.

The Nature Goddess continued to stare into the sky. But out of nowhere, she took her last demented breath, and collasped onto the ground. In that moment, Edyth began to remember everything that had just occurred. She jumped on Nathaniel’s back, and climbed out of the hole, desperate to ask The Nature Goddess many questions.

“Ouch! You could’ve prepared me for that before jumping on my spine,” her brother called out.

Edyth ignored her brother's petty comment and continued to dash towards The Nature Goddess, “Nature Goddess! Nature! Are you alright?”

The Nature Goddess did not respond right away. Edyth called out to her again, “What am I supposed to do? I don’t even know what I am,” she worried.

The Nature Goddess’ eyes opened widely, and her soul jumped out of her body, as her soul stood right above it, wandering in the air. “Do not fear. For everything that you do not know about your abilities yet, will soon come to you. As you go on, you will become stronger and wiser. And as soon as my soul leaves this earth, you will start to feel different. Everything you need to know about being Mother Nature will come to you naturally”.

Edyth was too shocked to say anything, so she nodded her head at a fast pace. The Nature Goddess’ soul gave Edyth a calm smile, and rose slowly into the clouds. Edyth sat on the forest ground in awe as she watched her fly away.

“Edyth! Uh.. I need some help over here, please,” Nathaniel was still struggling to get out of the deep hole, and he wasn’t too thrilled about it.

“Ugh, Nathaniel! I got out of that hole by myself and my brother, who is older and taller than me, can’t get out of it?” Edyth chuckled.

“Shut up, Edyth. It’s not like I have magical nature powers growing inside of me,” Nathaniel rolled his eyes and waited for Edyth to walk over to help him.

“Fine. Give me your hand,” Edyth helped him get out of the hole with little to no effort. Infact, Edyth pulled him up so fast that he flung into the air.

“Ahhhhh!” Nathaniel screamed, “Um, Edyth. That kind of hurt!”

“Sorry! I didn’t know that I could do that”

“No kidding. Let’s go home now,” Nathaniel was glad his sister was okay. Edyth and Nathaniel made their way home. They were safe and sound again.























As Edyth and Nathaniel grew up, a lot changed. Everyone knew that Edyth was now Mother Nature. All of her family members, classmates, and townspeople knew what happened to her, and thought that she was extraordinary. Edyth focused more on nature than she did on school. Nathaniel tried to push it aside, but he became jealous of his sister’s abilities more and more. The siblings fought often, and no one was on his side of things. Nathaniel and Edyth used to be close, but they became people who happened to live in the same house.

After a few more years, Nathaniel graduated medical school and pursued his dream of being a dentist. He moved out and moved in with his girlfriend. Edyth nor her parents heard from Nathaniel, at least not very often. Almost every conversation he had with his family would turn into a fight, so they decided to only speak a few times a year. Edyth didn’t go to college, so she built a gigantic tree house deep into the forest with her powers. Everyone was at peace, or so they thought.

Mother Nature strode down the sidewalk to check on the plants that she had created. Part of her job was to inspect the townspeople’s plants to make sure they were as healthy as they could be, and to take care of the townspeople as well. As she inspected the trees and flowers, she gently lifted her hand up towards the plants that needed her help to stay alive. Minuscule specks of golden dust surrounded the flowers and trees, as they twirled in the dust, growing taller by the second. She heard a strange noise coming from the corner of the street, but she just continued to work. She kept hearing the unusual racket, so she worked quickly. Before Mother Nature could process this trauma, a man dressed in all black with a clown mask and a bowie knife proceeded to dash towards her. She then began to run away from this man. Although she was creating distance between her and the clown, Mother Nature tripped over one of her sunflowers that had grown to be twice its size.

“Who are you?! You’ll pay for this,” Mother Nature screamed.

The man leaned over her and put the knife to her throat so she could not run away, “They call me The Slasher. I’m not frightened by you, and I’ll do whatever I want”.

He had a special victim this time. The Slasher moved his knife towards the innocent creature as she screamed from the scrutinizing pain that the sharp bladed knife had caused. Mother Nature had been lacerated, she started to bleed, and no longer had the ability to stand on her feet.

“Help… Help me! Someone- please!” Mother Nature begged as loud as she was capable of.

The serial killer had struck again. Little did he know that he was torturing the mother of all living things. Mother Nature was still laying down beside the humongous flower she had tripped over. Her torn-off legs started to dazzle with the flower’s golden dust that she had placed on it earlier to make the sunflower grow and bring the dead petals back to life. Since Mother Nature was a part of nature, the golden dust could heal her too. The sparkling specks of magical gold wrapped around her legs, lifting her up from the ground.

The Slasher was confused and afraid of the floating creature at the same time, “What are you?”

She answered his question strongly, as she floated above him in the air, her voice echoed throughout all of the town, “I am Mother Nature”.

The townspeople started to come out of their houses to see what the commotion was about.

“Look! It’s The Slasher! Someone help Mother Nature,” exclaimed a little boy.

“No need child, I am here to protect you,” Mother Nature reassured everyone.

Her legs reconnected to her body, and the fallen crisp fall leaves wrapped around them, along with the gold. She quickly formed into a golden tornado, which blew The Slasher a few blocks away. Mother Nature returned to the ground, and stood with her reattached legs, which looked brand new, and had no scars or blood running down them.

“The Slasher is running back here! Mother Nature, watch out,” the townspeople warned her.

“Don’t worry all,” Mother said, “He doesn’t know what he got himself into”.

The Slasher had an axe with him this time, and started screaming, “You don’t know who you’re messing with, you freak!”

Mother Nature just stood on the road, waiting for him to get closer. The murderer became confused as to why she wasn’t running away yet, but he continued to run, and lifted his axe up above his head to prepare for what he was about to do. He finally got close enough to slash her, so he lowered his axe and swung. As The Slasher swung for her legs once again, Mother Nature thrusted her hands while facing him. Mother Nature had gained enough strength back to propel him into the sky.

“AHHHHHHHHHHHH,” The Slasher screamed as he was thrown into the air.

The Slasher splattered onto the road, unconscious. Blood started to ooze out of his head. All of the townspeople were silent.

Mother Nature sauntered towards the body. She took the clown mask off of the man to see who had betrayed her. It was her brother, Nathaniel . Mother Nature hadn’t spoken to her brother in several years. He had always caused trouble in their family, and had always been jealous of Mother Nature's natural powers, so everyone in their family stopped talking to him. Some townspeople have told her family about what Nathaniel was up to, but never anything this serious. Since they no longer spoke, Mother Nature did not watch out over her brother like an older sister is supposed to do, and she didn’t want what just happened to her to happen to anyone else.

She sprinkled her mystical dust over the masked man. His body turned into a golden statue. Mother Nature lifted the statue, using her mind, so it could stand up straight. She then maneuvered it to the center of the town’s square.

“I have turned The Slasher into a statue as a reminder to love one another, and to stay away from violence,” Mother Nature announced, “Do you see what violence gets you? Nothing. Violence causes death. As the united people we are, we need to watch out for others. Don’t let violence ruin your life. This statue of the deceased Slasher will stay in the square of the town. It will be a reminder to love one another, and to not turn out like The Slasher did.”

The people of Greenville sighed in relief. They had hope that Mother Nature would take action to protect her town from The Slasher, and also find out who he was. Nathaniel’s parents and Mother Nature held a small funeral for him with his family members and a few of his friends. Most of them did not know what he was going through, and how jealous he was. So, Mother Nature made everyone at the event take a vow to always be there for one another to prevent a tragedy like this from happening again.

The town moved on, and hoped that violence in Greenville was a rare appearance. Mother Nature still had many years to live. In those years, she continued to watch after nature, kept violence to the minimum, and watched after the people of Greenville.


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135 Reviews


Points: 4350
Reviews: 135

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Wed Jan 13, 2021 10:51 pm
SilverNight wrote a review...



Hey there! I realized this has been in the Green Room for a while, so I thought I'd help get it out. This was an interesting concept for a story that was more of a legend than a folk tale, which was different than what I first expected, although it was fascinating to see that!

“Nathaniel!” Edyth wailed, “Where are you? I fell into a deep hole”.

“I See you,” Her brother came to the rescue, “Reach for my hand!”

A vigorous force shoved Nathaniel into the air, far away from Edyth.

“You are mine now,” A horrific creature instructed the young girl, “My life is close to its end. I need someone to take my place as The Nature Goddess. You will become Mother Nature”.

All Edyth wanted to do was escape, “Why me? Why can’t you pick someone who actually wants to be a nature freak? Or at least ask me in a polite way instead of digging a hole to put me in!”


This is an interesting, unexpected start. I never would have thought the last Mother Nature would have been scary! I noticed there's a couple of tiny punctuation changes to be made in the dialogue, so I'm adding that here if it helps!

“Nathaniel!” Edyth wailed. “Where are you? I fell into a deep hole.”

“I see you!” Her brother came to the rescue. “Reach for my hand!”

A vigorous force shoved Nathaniel into the air, far away from Edyth.

“You are mine now,” a horrific creature instructed the young girl. “My life is close to its end. I need someone to take my place as The Nature Goddess. You will become Mother Nature.”

All Edyth wanted to do was escape. “Why me? Why can’t you pick someone who actually wants to be a nature freak? Or at least ask me in a polite way instead of digging a hole to put me in!”


The Nature Goddess’ eyes opened widely, and her soul jumped out of her body, as her soul stood right above it, wandering in the air. “Do not fear. For everything that you do not know about your abilities yet, will soon come to you. As you go on, you will become stronger and wiser. And as soon as my soul leaves this earth, you will start to feel different. Everything you need to know about being Mother Nature will come to you naturally”.


I found the idea of a Mother Nature that passes on her gifts to be pretty cool!

“Fine. Give me your hand,” Edyth helped him get out of the hole with little to no effort. Infact, Edyth pulled him up so fast that he flung into the air.


"In fact" is two separate words. The comma after "hand" should also be replaced by a period.

Mother Nature strode down the sidewalk to check on the plants that she had created. Part of her job was to inspect the townspeople’s plants to make sure they were as healthy as they could be, and to take care of the townspeople as well. As she inspected the trees and flowers, she gently lifted her hand up towards the plants that needed her help to stay alive.


I wonder why she chooses to spend all her time focusing on one town when there's a whole world out there that could really use her. I'd be interested in seeing her reasons for saying!

Mother Nature had been lacerated, she started to bleed, and no longer had the ability to stand on her feet.


The first sentence should end after "lacerated", and then the new one begins right after that.

The Slasher was confused and afraid of the floating creature at the same time, “What are you?”

She answered his question strongly, as she floated above him in the air, her voice echoed throughout all of the town, “I am Mother Nature”.


We see later that the Slasher is her brother, and so he does know exactly who she is. He wouldn't really be asking her that, so if you want a question that expresses his confusion in the same way, I'd suggest something like "What are you doing?"

Mother Nature sauntered towards the body. She took the clown mask off of the man to see who had betrayed her. It was her brother, Nathaniel . Mother Nature hadn’t spoken to her brother in several years. He had always caused trouble in their family, and had always been jealous of Mother Nature's natural powers, so everyone in their family stopped talking to him. Some townspeople have told her family about what Nathaniel was up to, but never anything this serious. Since they no longer spoke, Mother Nature did not watch out over her brother like an older sister is supposed to do, and she didn’t want what just happened to her to happen to anyone else.


I was rather surprised by this, because earlier we were told he was dating someone and had graduated from medical school. That's a sign of a successful life, but then he became a criminal. How come? I feel like there's plenty that can be explored more deeply here!

Thanks for the story. I hope you find these comments and suggestions to be helpful!




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7 Reviews


Points: 88
Reviews: 7

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Wed Dec 02, 2020 12:42 am
timestamp wrote a review...



I loved the way you portrayed this piece of mythology. It’s clear that you put a lot of time and care into them, and for that you get a lot of respect. I also really enjoyed the concept that Mother Nature’s power gets passed onto those who she finds worth (or those who stumble upon it). Edyth is a really vibrant character, and I hope this isn’t just a one-shot, because I would really like to see how Edith deals with her newfound power as the goddess of Nature. That would be really interesting to see.

I would usually give some people pointers on their work, but I really don’t see anything grammatically wrong; it flows very nicely, and you use mature, flowery language that really gives this piece a mystical feel. You should be proud of this, really.

Happy writing,

-timestamp





What will live longer, you or your words? Something to think about the next time you abandon a project...
— Omni