Hi, MJenks.
First of all, I'm really sorry you have so many bad things to remember. I'm also sorry you had to lose your father and your grandfather. Having lost my mother myself when I was much too young, I know how it feels. It was actually the anniversary of her death two days ago and I spent the entire day curled up in bed with the headache from hell. The pain never goes away.
I think it's especially hard for people like us, who didn't have a 'normal' childhood because, on top of missing a parent, we have lots of unresolved issues with them. I know I'm sad that my mother isn't there anymore but I'm also angry with her for putting up with my father and the way he treated us, I'm ashamed of her weakness and I'm terrified I'm going to become one of my parents when I grow older and have my own children (which I'm not sure I will let happen).
It seems that you ended up in a decent foster family so that's at least one thing to be glad for.
I was a little confused at times. I understand that the way you chose to tell your story, like showing us snapshot after snapshot of you growing up, makes it hard to do much explaining but it felt like there were holes in the story.
I don't understand why your grandparents blamed their cancers on you. Were they really superstitious or was that the cancer and old age talking? How can abuse have a starting point? Is that simply the first time you remember your parents being violent? And what happened to your sister?
Anyway, good luck, MJenks.
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