Ice Cubes #19

Hey Meevs. This was a really good chapter. The dialogue seemed natural in its awkwardness, if that makes any sense at all lol! And I only caught a couple of things.

“Yeah there defiantly is.

*definately

“Oh ok. Your single then?”

*you're

That's all I got this Chapter. I'm straight off to the next one now. xD

“Complicated” by Avril Lavinge oh dear… is my initial thought.

Thanks,” I take a sip; it was cold “What were you trying to say up there?”

Posted Ice Cubes #20 its rated so it wont be on the main page, its also very short but hey, it builds tension that way

Well, I have to make all this shorter for the creative writing portoflio thing, they put together everyone who took the course's work and put it into a book i think, but I don't know how to shorten it!!!

anyway, thanks for the crit again Alianna as always

I have deicded to keep posting this, I think that my writing has improved so much since joinging with site and al the feedback i get for this has seriously helped and i think it can keep helping

Meevs
x

Yay!! Another great piece, Meeves!
Loved this:

Its strange, the girls all dance provocatively, trying to attract the boys, when they do they saunter off into a corner and make out for about half an hour. Its like a giant mating stadium or something.