MUSANG COFFEE’s WONDER
Melvin Banggollay
From the mountainous region of Kalinga,
Mt. Magallaya harbors untouched forest
Where hunters used to behold wild aroma
Of coffee beans scattered upon its breast
By wild cats known as musang or civet cats
That loved to eat and sip the ripest cherries
as they enjoy the sweet nectar to get stamina
to explore the wonder of the verdant forest.
The hunters pick the droppings of the cats
scattered upon the ground of the wilderness
as they were truly enchanted by the aroma
of the berries scattered by these wild civets
after processing them in their stomachs.
What a wonder, it had distinct taste
after roasting and brewing these beans
proven to give stamina with magic and aroma.
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125,017 Literary Works • 672,850 Reviews
Hey there!
I really liked this. It's an interesting subject choice, and you've made it all the more interesting with your poem. It's kind of quirky and cute, which I love.
One thing I would say is that you don't need to capitalise all of your lines. You don't have much punctuation, so treat it like prose and only capitalise the lines which follow the necessary punctuation.
But, it was a really nice poem! Well done!
~Amy
You reuse a lot of the words... I don't like it, it became boring and annoying at the end. Sorry. I do think you could do without some of the second stanza.
Here's how I'd fix it:
It's basicly the samething without the repeat. To me atleast.
Other than that. I liked it.Good job.
Good luck, keep writing.
Silented1.
I'm so sorry this went for so long unnoticed.. it makes me sad.
But I found it now.
It was a cute, whimsical poem that made me want to have some coffee.
I understand what you mean here, but it's oddly worded.
Enjoying the sweet nectar of the cherries and the cherries giving them stamina don't flow very well in this line. Try another word for stamina, and then change it at the end of the poem as well.
Besides that nitpick, great job and I hope this gets more critiques.
~Empress