I loved this poem. But I almost always love your work. You are such an absolutely amazing writer the way you string the words togather to make such meaningful and beautiful phrases. I wish I was blessed with such an absolutly amazing gift like you have.
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I found the line breaks a little excessive, but then, there could be some hidden meaning there I'm just not getting.
It's good, and there are some excellent lines there (poking my crotch is clever and funny, in a dark kind of way) but there's not quite enough - there isn't enough substance to really get my teeth into. I like it, but give me a bit more and you could make a really excellent piece out of this.
That's my 'umble 'pinion, sir.