Hello, my name is Abby Merton, I am 15, a sophomore student at Lancaster High School and I am at the Lancaster Police Station. I am in the questioning room with Detective Kate Scott right now while Jami, Ashley, Eva, Nadia and Jasmine are in the waiting room so they will get questioned. I volunteered to be first because nobody else would have the guts. Well Detective Scott started asking me questions saying if my real name is Abby Merton and going through my background, school record, my record, and my grades. I am a straight A student and have been from Kindergarten all the way to last year in ninth grade when my friend Eberey went missing. She even asked me if I have ever lied before and I said yes and she asked when was the last time I lied and I said eight and the lie detector said I was telling the truth and I was.
Kate asked, "Do you mind if you could tell me everything that happened five days before her disappearance to the day she disappeared?"
I said, "No problem but my side of the story will take a while...I was, just standing there. I had no idea what was going on. I was just minding my business and talking to my friend Nadia, then all of a sudden we saw some girl running after the other. Security was not around to stop them because they went off campus. Well every adult was gone and it was just us kids at school alone. Well when the two girls got closer to me and Nadia we noticed it was Ashley running from Eva. Ashley, my best friend, was running and then she saw the group and came to our group. She hid behind them and then they saw Eva coming there way. I was away from our group because I was with Nadia getting some lunch but we were coming back and we were about ten feet or so away so Eva didn't know we were hurrying toward the group. She asked them which way Ashley went and Jami said the bathroom so she went to the bathroom running all madly.
Me and Nadia reached the group right when she left and we all turned to Ashley and asked her what the heck was going on and she said something about Eva heard from someone that Ashley was talking about her even though she wasn't. Eva got mad so she wants to go after Ashley and beat her up because she heard thousands of times about Ashley saying stuff and this time it was really bad stuff so she got mad and now wants to beat her up.
We saw Eva coming out of the bathroom and she saw Ashley was with us and saw I was there. Eva is afraid of me for some reason. I find it kind of funny because I am not mean at all. I am all purely nice like Ashley. Ashley and I don't talk about anyone behind there back at all. Oh, um, I think Eva might be afraid of me though because my mom is the 9-1-1 operator and my mom knows all the cops here in this town.
She just yelled from the bathroom to Ashley saying that she is going to pay for saying stuff about her. Eva left to go to Jasmine's group even though every one there hates her. They hate her because she stole one of Jasmine's boyfriends away from her because she was jealous and she did the same with Ashley. Most of all of our friends, well most of Ashley's, Jasmine's and my friends knows that Eva is a bitch. She over sings and she shows her fat. It is so nasty. We can't believe her mom lets her daughter wear shirts like that. I mean people do talk, if you know what I mean."
Kate asked, "You mean talk about her behind her back, and make fun of her because she is showing her fat to the world because she wears too tight of shirts at school and in public?"
I said, "Yes, exactly. People at school do but not my group of friends 'cause we're not like that. Oh, um, I don't know if you need to know this but people say Eva is jealous she can't get a guy. So the day past and it is after school. I am not there yet and she just starts saying crap to Ashley and Eberey just comes out of no where and this is were I show up and so Eberey says to Eva, well long story, short, she said get the heck away from her and back off and called her little girl. Ashley is to nice to say anything like that. Eva killed over what Eberey said to her. Eva was in so much shocked when Eberey called her a 'little girl.'
Eva said, 'Don't call me little girl, little girl.'
Eberey just punched her and, well, we all new it was going to come soon because she does not take crap from anybody, epically Eva. They were fighting and security came and they went to the office. Since it was Eva's doing she got suspended for a day and Eberey was off the hook. The next day when Eberey came back to school she was kind of happy but I knew something was wrong with her.
So I asked her, 'Hay, Eb, is something wrong, cause if anything is you can tell me. I won't judge or say anything if you don't want me to.'
She told me that she got a text message from an anonymous number and it said that she was going to pay for saying all that stuff about Eva and if she told anyone she would tell everyone her deepest secret that only Eva knew because two years ago they were really good friends."
Kate asked me, "So, you think that either Eva or one of her friends or family that she told killed your friend?"
"Yes."
"If I asked your friends what happened five days before she went missing do you think they will say the same thing?"
"Well not the same thing because they were in the group when she cached Eberey and after school the rest either ride the bus or walk home and that is the opposite direction where me, Ashley, Jasmine, Eva and...Eberey walk and Jami, Nadia herd what happened since Nadia rides the bus and Jami walks home in the opposite direction."
Kate asked in a supition voice, "And where did Jami and Nadia here from?"
"They herd from Ashley, Eberey and I. Why? Oh wait do you think either me or Ashley killed her? Come on, we don't lie, we don't kill anybody. We just kill little animals like flies and ants and bees and other little things like that. We wouldn't kill a dog or human being."
"It is just protocol. Even the nicest kids may have a dirty secret like killing things that matter like dogs and human beings."
"Well not me or my friends. Plus I know none of us didn't kill her because we were at Ashley's and Jasmine's house spending the night except for Eva and Eberey. Eberey had to go to home and do chores and Eva well we don't like her so no way we would invite her to come over."
"Abby, this part is really important, ok?"
"Ok."
"Did Eberey ever say she was going to call right when she got home or did any of you guys tell her to call when she got home so you guys know she got home safely?"
"Yea, she said she would call right when she got home before she did her chores. But...she...never called. Not even one ring."
"And it never accord for you guys to call her?"
"Yes, it did. We called her but she didn't answer after four rings so we figured that her mom took her phone away so her phone didn't distract her from doing her work."
"And she couldn't call right when she was in front of her house?"
"Well, yea she could have. It never crossed our minds."
"Ok so could do tell me what happened a on the third day?"
"Yea...we all came to school and we met where we usually meet by the cafeteria in the morning. Eva hangs with her friends which is over by our group, but that day she didn't come to school. She didn't show up on the third day or fourth or fifth. There was one rumor around school saying that she was planing a party. Another said she was out of town for a family emergency. The third one said she was sick. And the last one said that she was so beat up from Eberey hitting her, which is not true cause all the damage Eberey could have done was minor bruises. Oh but on the sixth day, when she went missing, Eva was at school all happy and cheery trying to be nice to us epically Eberey. She said sorry a thousands times for starting a physical fight and for chasing Ashley around school. We thought something was up. So on the seventh day when her parents called me telling me that Eberey was missing I told them that Eva was acting all nice and stuff yesterday the day she went missing."
Kate said, "Yea, in the statement paper is says that Eva was being nice to your friend."
Well, how do you like my story so far? I got the police report format part from ziggiefred because right when he said police report it gave me the idea of someone should be murdered and someone finds the body a year later and you get the idea.
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Hello there
Well, this was a little off for me. Firstly, I think you should try and separate your paragraphs first.
And now we get into the story. I spotted a few spelling mistakes in there. As for what I thought about the story, it was a bit off as I mentioned before. The whole thing was as if I was reading a police report. There was not much of storytelling going on...I hope I don't sound mean or anything.
The first few lines of the story were good and they got me thinking, OK, I want to find out what exactly what was 'going on'. But as I continued reading, your communication with me (the reader) seemed to just break away. Maybe you should try another approach. Try reading a lot of texts to get the feel of telling a story.
PM me if you are misunderstood by ziggiefred
Keep writing
Ziggie