First off, wow!
Fellow Homestuck here!
Alright, let's rock!
"spinning atoms and an absentminded dedication to nuclear theory" I think you've captured her interest in science here and also her shirt symbol! very well done.
"hair like drunken string physics and a demeanor that's the most wonderful sort of cheery" The looks of her hair? personality? Check! Check! First thing I thought of during this line was string physics at a bar (Laughs)
"widely-rimmed glasses reflecting a brilliant night sky and plants she's grown for years" Here you tie her glasses into the earlier mentioned physics which makes her seem like a nerd. I think you've captured it perfectly. The fact that you used the reflection of her glasses to show she is always looking up is wonderful. This also gives her an air of optimism and a little airy. It could flow smoother from the sky to the plants though but bonus points for adding another interest.
"a fondness for nostalgic shows and the sights of her rifle fixed on strange new frontiers"
I find it Ironic that you used the squiddles show and the rifle in the same line. It is strange but highly effective.
"watcher of the golden towers and the clouds that soar o’erhead"
Ahhh! Prospit! I love love love love how you used 'o'er'
"Jade Harley, Witch of Space and Savior of the Dreaming Dead" It's a lovely closing here. I'm a little confused about her being the 'Savior of the dreaming dead' but besides that, it's great.
Overall, you captured this character perfectly in just a few sentences. awesome job!
Points: 963
Reviews: 6
Donate