E - Everyone

Love

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violets are blue

Roses are too

Hey I think I love you

Maybe I do or maybe I don't

You have to wait, you probably won't

Life isn't always fair

And I really do care

We are the perfect pair

We're as wonderful as air

I wonder if you know the real me

Warning ~ I might sting like a bumble bee

When I think about love

I say that it's the feeling from the world up above

I can't imagine life any other way

When I'm with you, I have a great day

Now you know my point of view

But have you loved at least a few

Comments & reviews · 4
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Purple
Review
Purple wrote a review · Thu Feb 20, 2014 1:07 am

This is actually kind of cute. It's not exactly too romantic but its suitable for this hallmark holiday. Along the lines of literary techniques: there was a scattered rhyme skeme. I could see you definitely wanted it to rhyme but to help it flow more maybe go in patterned paces. What I mean by this is instead of saying something with AAA BB CCCC DD EE FF GG, try to be more consistent like AAA BB CCC EE FFF GG. I liked the little part about "stinging" the person gently as if the experience might be painful but bearable. Have a good day!

User avatar
Willard
Review
Willard wrote a review · Wed Feb 19, 2014 3:21 am

Hey, lilGbabyG, Strange here and I have a review for you!
(Is there any chance you are a Vikings fan?)
I see that you're new, and you're most likely to encounter me a lot. I run on an anti-love basis. I never got why everyone dumbs down what "love" is. Usually, they know nothing. If a guy can get tail from a girl, they are in "love". I know, that didn't start that good. This poem has an adorable factor in it. Yes, adorable. It shows how one is feeling emotions for another. It has this subtle sweetness that improves it a lot. I never really see that in poems. They just over do, "ERMAHGERD YOU"RE SAH PRETTY!!!". You never do that. It's a lot simpler than other poems, and sometimes that's all you need. Time to break down my favorite parts.
"Warning ~ I might sting like a bumble bee." I like that humor.
"When I'm with you, I have a great day." You're keeping it simple. That's what you need to do.
"Hey I think I love you." Over used, but.. "Maybe I do, maybe I don't." Bingo.
Overall, good job. Adorable, sweet, AND SIMPLE.
P.S You need to capitalize Violets.
Strange gives you...
8.01/10
Good job
Keep writing
Stay groovy, my amigo

Awwwwwe thanks so much. To be honest, I don't even like this poem, this was a poem I wrote for Valentines Day a few years back. I'm glad you liked it, I hope you enjoy more of my work when I post them up.

Okay I won't be long.
Maybe you could go and reword a couple of sentences.
The poem was really good overall.

Hey I think I love you

Maybe I do or maybe I don't

You have to wait, you probably won't

This phrase could be reworded.
Other than that this is really good.

Thank you it means a lot and I actually don't even like this one I just put it up to see what people think of it

Hey Tiny here!

I just a few comments about this poem to help the over all flow.

Hey I think I love you

Maybe I do or maybe I don't

You have to wait, you probably won't


It would flow better if maybe I do and maybe don't was separated into two lines.

I wonder if you know the real me

Warning ~ I might sting like a bumble bee

When I think about love


separate Warning~ and I might sting like a bumble bee into two lines.

violets are blue

Roses are too


violets on the first line should be capitalized.

Over all this was a fantastic poem.

Rates: Grammar- 9/10
Spelling 10/10
Overall: 10/10

Keep writing 8)



Sometimes I'm terrified of my heart; of its constant hunger for whatever it is it wants. The way it stops and starts.
— Poe